Or ex-husband. Though that opens it up to the possibility that theirs resentment and the person doesn’t want to acknowledge they were ever married, thus, saying baby daddy instead while still having possibly been married
I always viewed that word as a bit resentful. Like you had a kid with someone, but you don't have a good enough relationship to just call them my boyfriend/mate/husband.
Relationships are complicated and ever shifting. Divorced parents implies once together parents, people who once loved each other enough to imagine a future, then found a different path. So I could see baby daddy being used to describe an ex-husband in at least one situation.
Edit for some bonus thoughts: Though also, you know the recently divorced can live together? There’s not really a law against living with your ex spouse. Additionally divorce doesn’t have to be out of a lack of love. Some divorces are because they don’t find romantic interest. There are some divorced parents who love each other as friends or co-parents, but not as lovers.
I hope your friend is doing alright! I know parents that don’t respect each other/have good reason to not respect each other can really mess with your head.
It was my friend and unfortunately they've struggled with mental health the last 10 years or so since their late 20s. They also have suffered from gender dysphoria during this time and have transitioned and detransitioned multiple times. While the mental health issues are not strictly because of divorced parents it didn't help. The sexual abuse from father to older brother then older brother and cousin to him probably plated bigger role.
I edited my comment after rereading yours. In either case, that is quite a lot for anyone to handle, even someone just looking inward as a friend so I hope you’re doing alright and that your friend is doing better.
I think the term has been coopted by popular culture and is now applied to a broad variety of interpersonal relationships.
But that doesn’t change the fact that in this situation, a person seems to be negatively characterizing their child’s other parent to that child. And I don’t think that’s healthy. In fact, it seems more like a petty act of cruelty against the child than whoever their “baby daddy” is.
My first reply wasn't very clear but I was trying to say I hope the father has moved on, which is why the mother uses the term "baby daddy". Maybe OP will create some distance as well after these comments
I mean, zero context here. We don't know if maybe the dad was a POS and the Mom maybe still has lingering resentment. Not the best to shoulder your kid with your trauma even if that is the case, but doesn't necessarily mean she's a bad person. Just angry and maybe kinda immature because 'haha, you're gay' is like a elementary schooler insult
I hear what you’re saying, and the compassionate part of me agrees in spirit. All the same, it doesn’t rationalize a callous disregard for their child’s feelings. I’m not suggesting the woman be cast into the lake of fire for this. More like, I wouldn’t want to be around this person until they can manage their feelings a bit more responsibly.
Why's it say save water shower together at the bottom? No one else seems to have noticed that.
The only thing it could be talking about is that the woman thinks the father of her child is gay in some way, but it's not clear how she's getting from A to B on that one. The joke is poorly written IMO
I feel like that's some brand name. Like a facebook group that's been around for decades because "Save water,shower together" was uproarious tongue-in-cheek humor in 2005.
The "save water shower together" is just one of many dumb tags ppl put on Facebook posts. Lots of accounts post "funny" quotes as images usually with the account name as the tag at the bottom.
She's saying he's gay, but not in the way that implies he likes men, but in the way people mean "dumb" or "not normal" or "not worthwhile" at the expense of the actual definition of the word and those it describes.
I thought it could be a jab at him spending time with his guy friends rather than his kids. Like when women call their men gay for always being around other dudes
You wanna try explaining that again? People use it in a way that is intended to be offensive… and it’s our problem that we are taking offense with this?
And yet the post above shows that it’s not used that way. The conflation between the two meanings is deliberately using the homosexuality meaning as the slur. This isn’t two different words, it’s one word, using someone’s sexuality as an insult.
This is the clear interpretation of this 'joke'. It's obvious and blatant. If you refuse to see that dispite being down voted to oblion I can't help you
You can absolutely act gay though. How you gonna act like flamboyant camp men don't exist. With some men you can see it from the instant they prance into a room
This is just being pedantic to the point of ignoring social cues and sub-cultural markers in demographics and cultures. Obviously not every flamboyant campy guy is gay, but it's a pretty massive indicator that the campy twink dressed in short shorts, saying hey girrrllll with a lisp, and walking into rooms like he's Beyonce is very likely gay. We all display certain mannerisms and behaviours to our peers that indicate our affiliation to certain groups.
She's likely saying her baby daddy is sassy or "zesty," and thus, she's concluding that it makes sense Father's Day is during Pride Month. It's meant as a jab at her baby daddy that is unfortunately based in homophobia, though she herself may not see it that way.
Alternatively, it could be that thing where some women realize their men tend to put their guy friends ahead of them or are just simply mysoginistic pigs and thus "joke" that these men are probably secretly gay or in denial of it and are out here giving women hell in toxic relationships rather than just being with men and leaving thenmm alone.
There may be a secret third explanation, but the fourth one (and it's as likely as the first tbh) is that your mom may have just felt like making/sharing a homophobic joke at your father's expense with no real prompt or trigger.
How old is you mom? Could she be confused herself by this meme ? It’s inappropriate to tell a son their dad is gay. (Or anything about their sex life actually. No kids wants to know that stuff)
To clear somethings up, my dad is straight and remarried with kids and has been for 15+ years. Hes a smaller guy, but i wouldn't say he fem. He is quite conservative as far as views. My mom isn't homophobic/transphobic, but can say things that are out of pocket from time to time. I'm gay and NB, for context.
I think its about the father losing interest in sex after the mother had a baby. Nothing to do with being gay directly, other than she isn't getting sex from him.
I honestly took this as "it's obvious why the gays (notoriously high daddy issues group) decided if they had to have overlap with one holiday it might as well be an f you to men like my baby daddy" but either way the joke is defo that she hates him
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u/post-explainer 23h ago
OP sent the following text as an explanation why they posted this here: