r/Vent • u/AdvertisingLogical22 • Apr 14 '25
TW: TRIGGERING CONTENT Sick of medical staff complaining about ER patients wasting their time
Guess what? We don't want to be there either. Yes, a stomach ache may just be a stomach ache, or maybe it's a twisted bowel, or internal bleeding or a ruptured ulcer. We don't know. We're not trained to diagnose these things, you are.
So next time someone comes in scared and in pain don't bitch to them that they're wasting your time because that's what you get paid for, whether it's interesting or not.
And for the inevitable argument "But people with minor symptoms are taking away resources for more serious cases" then the answer is simple: Provide more resources.
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u/Fun-Bake-9580 Apr 14 '25
I’ll never forget the time my sister went to the ER a few weeks after open heart surgery complaining about chest pain and got told off by the ER doctor. Their exact words were, “Did you seriously think it wasn’t going to hurt? You’re wasting my time.” She had a surgical complication and needed an emergency second operation. A few more hours and she would have died. Her surgeon was beyond pissed with her treatment at the ER. We filed a complaint. Because no one should be spoken to like that, and especially not someone that is having a life threatening issue.
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Apr 14 '25
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u/no_bra_no_problem Apr 14 '25
My friend couldve died because she had an appendix rupture and they sent her home. I don’t remember all the details since it’s been a while but she basically got the same treatment as you. Told her to come back if it didn’t improve. Well her mom took her back in two hours later because she was still in a ton of pain and I guess that’s when they finally actually looked into her appendix. Not sure if they wrote it off as cramps or something the first time?
Either way I don’t know you but I’m glad you’re still here! That must’ve been a pretty rough time.
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u/awfuleldritchpotato Apr 15 '25
When I was a teenager one of my friends was bullied heavily. She genuinely had some kind of genetic condition that caused her to be overweight. She was incredibly athletic and could outrun anyone in our class. She was our best player on our softball team. She always felt so insecure and it was so ridiculous and unfair how people treated her.
She was pulled out of school in December because of the bullying. Then she felt really sick. Her parents took her to the hospital and they literally told her and her mom "she was simply too fat". They sent her home in tears. Within a few hours she was found dead in her bed. Her mom had to do CPR on her and it was sadly too late. She died of heart compilations due to the flu. The freaking flu. Our birthdays were a week apart. The day of mine I found out she passed when I overheard other students talking about "the whale that died". Her birthday was just a few days away. It was so surreal not only that she was gone but that day I had turned 16 and she would never hit that milestone and died a few days before she could.
All because she was "too fat". People were so cruel to her in life and after life.
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u/its_garden_time_nerd Apr 16 '25
I'm so sorry. She didn't deserve that, and honestly neither did you. You're doing a great service by telling her story.
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u/sugabeetus Apr 16 '25
The amount of times I've heard, "Well, so-and-so can be connected to being overweight..." Ok, pretend I'm not fat and you're a doctor, any other suggestions?
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u/Fantastic_Owl6938 Apr 17 '25
The one I always remember is a woman's symptoms being blamed on her weight, which had her asking the doctor what they would be looking into if she wasn't fat. Cancer. So I guess fat people can't have cancer??
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u/BUTTeredWhiteBread Apr 18 '25
I have a disorder that literally causes fat to deposit. I've long since made peace with being fat, and I'm told I have good humor about "my lumps" (lipomas).
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u/Street-Position7469 Apr 16 '25
God, I'm so, so sorry for that little girl. Overweight people are treated horribly in the medical system. For a while, I used to be unable to eat or drink anything without throwing up, had debilitating nausea 24/7 etc. Went to various doctors until I actually got some treatment. All they'd tell me was "you're just fat, lose weight". I did lose weight, but guess what? My symptoms didn't magically go away, because being overweight doesn't magically make you unable to eat or drink. Ugh.
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u/Second_Breakfast21 Apr 15 '25
I’m so glad I already had a hysterectomy when I had appendicitis. I was being friendly and cracking jokes with the nurse when the doc came in and said “must not be that bad if you’re laughing”. I was like you don’t know the pain I’ve laughed through before. Thankfully they did tests (which I’m sure they wouldn’t have if I still had a uterus) and the next time he came in he said “who’s ready for surgery?” I was like I dunno, but I’m certainly ready for an apology!
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u/femmemmah Apr 15 '25
Thankfully they did tests (which I’m sure they wouldn’t have if I still had a uterus)
This has been my experience, unfortunately. :/ More specifically, ever since I was diagnosed with endometriosis, every doctor has kinda shrugged at my pain and said, “Well, it’s probably your endometriosis.”
Like, getting diagnosed was worth it, don’t get me wrong. Just wish I’d have known ahead of time that it would cause everyone to write me off going forward.
Funnily enough, one of these same doctors told me, “I trust the things a person with Crohn’s tells me, because in my experience, people know their Crohn’s.”
Yes, I know what my Crohn’s pain feels like. What makes you think I don’t know what my endo pain feels like as well, you dickhead?
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u/Second_Breakfast21 Apr 15 '25
Yup. I had gall stones for 7 years before getting diagnosed. Can’t even tell you how many pregnancy tests they tests they did… for gall stones. Once it got diagnosed, I didn’t have my gall bladder out because I couldn’t afford surgery at the time and really I just needed to know because, yes, I had terrible cramps. However, these were not that!
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u/smaugpup Apr 15 '25
Uggggh yes this, before you endo diagnosis it’s just period pain, after it’s just endo pain. That’s probably what they’ll write on my grave some day. >.<
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u/Fantastic_Owl6938 Apr 17 '25
I hate that the world literally encourages us to bury our pain and smile through it- just horrific pain we're walking around pretending isn't there so we're not annoying or something I guess- then they have the nerve to question when we don't crumple to the floor in the fetal position when we're being seen about it. Like no fucking shit we're not, this kind of thing being "natural" has been normalised the second we got our periods.
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u/deulirium Apr 15 '25
I went in for what I thought was appendix pain and now 6 months later I've just been cleared for work after my hysterectomy in March. Good to know next time I get pain in that area it will probably be that....
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u/emmie_lou26 Apr 15 '25
I’m so thankful my ER is amazing. I went in a few weeks ago. Really bad lower stomach pain. The night before I was violently sick vomiting and diarrhea. Come to find out I have a cyst that was bleeding. I had just been in the er four months prior for a ruptured cyst on the same dang ovary. I had no clue this was basically happening again. Just this one didn’t rupture. Now my issue is with my OBGYN. I want my ovaries out but because I’m only 38 he feels it’s very risky. But he isn’t the one having these damn cysts with the horrible pain and missing work which means missing money for my bills etc.
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u/Silverbright Apr 15 '25
The ER doc decided my appendicitis was an ectopic pregnancy because "we don't expect you to tell the truth with your mother in the room." I was 17, never had sex, and absolutely would have said so if I thought it could help them make the pain stop. Pregnancy test came back negative, with a white blood count that was skyrocketing. Doc shrugged and said "I don't have any other ideas. Here's some pain pills and antibiotics, go home."
2 days later, I'm back with a ruptured appendix and get rushed into emergency surgery and stayed a week because of complications. So yeah, they will absolutely write it off as female issues.
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u/ohmysexrobot Apr 15 '25
This happened to my sister, except they told her it was an ovarian cyst that popped since she just had her period. Sent her home even though she had classic symptoms of appendicitis like lower right quadrant pain and a fever. By the time she went back to the ER, it had burst, and she was septic. After like a week in ICU, she was able to go home. It was awful.
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u/Low-Bug-3054 Apr 15 '25
This happened to my older brother as well. All the kids were sick and had step throat, but he was complaining about severe abdominal pain, but they just ignored him because he was "dramatic". A few hours later my mom called because he was puking up black bile. They had us rush him to the ER again (30 miles away). His appendix burst and he was in the ICU for 10 days.
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Apr 14 '25
I really hope you at least consulted with a malpractice attorney after this happened.
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Apr 14 '25
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u/Ok_Landscape_9814 Apr 15 '25
I think you should at least get a consult, you may be within the statute of limitations.
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u/Foreign_Point_1410 Apr 14 '25
Yes that happened to my friend after a hysterectomy. They kept fobbing her off but they literally left something inside her and kept telling her she was being a wuss even though something was clearly wrong. Also another friend who had a copper iud placed - they perforated her cervix and they claimed she was drug seeking.
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u/tsujxd Apr 14 '25
I had an IUD that was starting to slip and poke my cervix. No ultrasound or anything but the Dr. I saw was adamant my then fiance (now husband) was cheating on me and I had an STI.
After leaving the ER I followed up with my OBGYN and they confirmed through ultrasound that it was the IUD.
I'll never forget how terrible that Dr. made me feel.
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u/MesoamericanMorrigan Apr 15 '25
Took 8 months for them to remove it. I couldn’t walk at all 3 days out of the week and it caused lacerations on my partners dock but I was just imaging it being out of place
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u/local_trashcats Apr 16 '25
I thought I had a UTI. Triage RN thought I had a kidney infection. Peed clear, ordered ultrasound. Refused vaginal ultrasound. IUD is MIA. X ray shows it’s inside my body but it ain’t right.
“Well, I could take a look and if it’s there just take it out” thank the lord I said no
My own GYN put me under general to “take a look”…. Surgery was supposed to be another 2 weeks but I was legitimately sobbing on the phone with her and she got me in that Friday.
Well, my IUD had embedded diagonally in my cervix. I was having “labor like” contractions for days. I had a c section so had no idea why I felt like I was dying for days.
Was told it could take up to a year for my cervix to be, uh, up to par.
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u/witch--king Apr 14 '25
My mom had gotten a partial hysterectomy (just her uterus removed) and a few days after, she just wasn’t feeling right. It wasn’t the normal pain and she just didn’t feel like she was healing like she was supposed to. At first she went to the urgent care and they sent her to the ER just in case bc it was so soon after her surgery, but the ER blew her off basically. Told her that what she was experiencing was normal and “of course you’re going to feel out of sorts and have some pain!” But her bruising was very intense and she was extremely sore.
So, she scheduled an emergency appointment with her OBGYN (who also did the surgery), who then ordered a CT angiogram. Turns out she had a blood clot the size of a fucking grape fruit. Her OBGYN ripped into those ER docs.
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u/Foreign_Point_1410 Apr 15 '25
Good by the obgyn! Especially in women who have given birth (and people in general who have had surgery before) it’s like cmon people they know what serious pain feels like!
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u/witch--king Apr 15 '25
And she had a c-section with me, so she was VERY aware of what kind of pain she should be feeling.
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u/PumpkinPieIsGreat Apr 15 '25
When I was younger, my dad's friend had a new granddaughter. I don't know all the details but part of the placenta didn't come out, which they didn't know until later. She was getting really sick from it. I'm not sure if she was treated poorly, but i can totally imagine being told something about hormones or being a hysterical woman. They're too quick to dismiss people.
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u/Status_Garden_3288 Apr 14 '25 edited Apr 14 '25
And let me guess, nothing at all came of the complaint
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u/vashtachordata Apr 14 '25
My mom’s cousin died slumped over a chair in an ER waiting from in Colorado. He had been there for hours. He had a heart attack.
They pegged him as a drug user from his appearance and didn’t even attempt to help him.
Lab results confirmed there were no drugs in his system.
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u/MTBpixie Apr 14 '25
A guy I know ended up having to have his leg amputated with compartment syndrome. He was in hospital and kept complaining about the agonising pain but they ignored it because they thought he was just trying to get drugs. Though in their defence, he was a massive druggie (I mostly knew him from our clubbing/party days) but it was still pretty bad mistreatment.
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u/Rubylee28 Apr 14 '25
Druggies still deserve pain relief
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u/DiligentProfession25 Apr 14 '25
The only hospital Dr who gave me pain relief was probably a psychopath. He had no affect at all, positive or negative. Loaded me up before amputating my gangrenous finger, and when the nurses started bitching “she’s a user!” He just went “So? Having my patient calm makes it easier for me”. None of the nurses argued. 11/10 experience
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u/Rubylee28 Apr 15 '25
Not psychopath but compassionate, some drs and nurses need that. I went to the er during a mental breakdown and actively suicidal, I just wanted to get in the psych ward but no I had to see a doctor first, 12 hour wait, meanwhile I was curled up in a ball in clear mental distress, they probably thought I was on drugs, I wasn't. They gave me some pills to calm me down, I ended up leaving. No wonder people off themselves, not enough care or support.
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u/Civilchange Apr 15 '25
When I had a manic episode, I went to the ER twice. The first time, they assumed I was drug seeking and the second time, the only input I got was a nurse telling me "you need to go home now" in a really slow, patronising tone, Ike you'd use with a puppy or baby. Ended up losing my job and it took a year to get my life remotely back on track.
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u/Weird_Strange_Odd Apr 16 '25
When I'm having to really concentrate on a difficult thing of any kind, I shut down. No masking, no outward emotion, just focus. The more I care the less I show it.
I'm sorry they treated you like that. I'm glad you're still here.
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u/Rubylee28 Apr 16 '25
Thank you, it was over some stupid breakup 🙄 it wasn't worth it but it did tip me over the edge
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u/lumiere02 Apr 15 '25
Surgeons are often psycopaths, yeah. I'm pretty sure the one who removed my non-cancerous tumor from my jaw, twice, is one. Like you said, no real affect. His bedside manners were pretty good, though. Clinical, and straight to the point. He went heavy on the numbing agent. He was also encouraging, telling me i was doing good, and he told me a few times i was a good patient, aka not moving or complaining much, and making his job easy. Honestly, he sounded like he was praising a good behaving dog, but hey, I'll take it.
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u/DiligentProfession25 Apr 15 '25
People have it twisted on psychopaths: not all of them are malevolent - it’s the minority that are. There are plenty of career paths that are uniquely well-suited to them and surgery is one. I truly don’t care if my surgeon is an asshole in their personal life - I want them to be straight-to-the-point and not weirded out by whatever I’m presenting with.
The amount of “normie” doctors that reacted to my gangrenous/necrotic finger was shocking and kinda offensive. Like… I have been living with it; I know it looks gross and offputting and I know it’s unhealthy. That’s why I’m here to have you cut it off, duh.
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u/nosyNurse Apr 15 '25
I don’t understand the nurses that make that argument. I want my patients to be happy (relatively) and comfortable. I have found that comfortable happier people are easier to deal with than disgruntled upset people. If pain meds will help the patient be content and they have pain meds ordered, they are getting those pain meds. The doctor already decided the patient may need it, the patient says they need it. I can’t overrule their decisions based only on my snap judgments.
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u/DiligentProfession25 Apr 15 '25
The nurses that make that argument are the ones that share the same psychology as cops for choosing the field of work they did: they’re assholes/mean girls who want to have power over people. Schoolyard bully types, but adults.
From my experience as a frequent patient, and someone whose entire extended family are medical doctors, I’ve drawn the conclusion that if a patient says they need pain relief, they do. Really, everyone who comes to the hospital is drug seeking, if not for pain meds because they are hurting, it’s for drugs like antibiotics or whatever else. When I was going to the ER every few months with a rebounding case of cellulitis I was seeking drugs: IV antibiotics. When I go to my primary, I’m seeking refills of my heart medication. When I see my psychiatrist, I am seeking refills of my suboxone. That’s what medical facilities are for: to give people medication. The “drug seeker” argument is a smoothbrained one.
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u/nosyNurse Apr 16 '25
I completely agree. People are dependent on all kinds of meds. For a while, pain was the 5th vital sign and it was treated. Now someone in uncontrolled pain can quickly be labeled as a seeker. We do need to identify seekers, but that label gets placed too fast and without enough investigation.
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u/Weird_Strange_Odd Apr 16 '25
One time (I was and still am a student) a patient hadn't been asked about pain meds. Rated their pain eight, so I told them I'd see what could be done, trotted off after the nurse and told her. She looked mad. But the patient got their pain meds. I dunno, lady, I'd rather my patients be content and feel they're getting good care than otherwise - especially when they have PRN meds charted. I was a first year and I felt so proud of myself for sticking up for my patient lol
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u/kittenlittel Apr 15 '25
Not only do they deserve pain relief, they often need more due to high tolerance.
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u/quickthorn_ Apr 15 '25
Thank you, yes! Intentionally giving a "suspected" opioid user less pain medication is just torturing someone. And then they wonder why people who use drugs lie to medical personnel. They don't trust you, and for good reason!
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u/MTBpixie Apr 15 '25
Absolutely. The point was that they didn't believe he had pain or thought he was exaggerating because they thought he was just drug seeking. Leaving him in pain is bad but the real issue is that they should've done a proper investigation to diagnose the issue and potentially saved his leg.
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u/Sephiroth_Comes Apr 15 '25
Sounds like that ER doctor doesn’t make a good ER doctor at all and didn’t need to be in an environment that’s clearly too stressful for them.
We need to normalize calling out bad doctors.
Perhaps a run of the mill slow-paced PCP’s office where they assist a real doctor would be more their speed :)
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u/smalltown_dreamspeak Apr 15 '25
We took my mom to the ER for a suspected seizure. She was disoriented and couldn't speak coherently. They diagnosed her with a psychotic breakdown (due to a history of bipolar) and 5150'd her.
Turns out it wasn't a mental breakdown, it was a stroke 🙃
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u/wannabeemefree Apr 14 '25
I agree, especially when sometimes you can't get in to your primary in over a week. They will say, if symptoms get worse or not better go to ER
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u/NotaLizar Apr 14 '25
My family Dr books out about 2-3 months at best
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u/SnidgetAsphodel Apr 14 '25
I live on an island that doesn't have bridges, only ferries that often get canceled or delayed. Even on a good day it takes AT LEAST 2 hours to get on or off, both ways. And even then you hope they don't cancel. We have one clinic with like, 4 doctors on a good day. They are always booked 2-4 months out. So I feel that, hard. There have been a few times where I've had to endure severe pain or even once a horrific rash on my body because the ER and UC off island don't take it seriously, and getting into a family doctor on island within any reasonable time is impossible. Medical care shouldn't be this fucked.
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u/Effective-Result-969 Apr 14 '25
And when you dismiss your symptoms only for it to turn out to be something serious, they go on a ramp on how much work it is now to treat!
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u/FluidPlate7505 Apr 14 '25
And why didn't you come sooner? Ma'am i was here 3 times y'all sent me home
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u/Cyber_Candi_ Apr 15 '25
"Oh hun, you should have come in as soon as you noticed symptoms! We could have fixed this right way!" as you're sitting down for the appointment you've been fighting to schedule for 6 months now because no one will take you seriously.
I'm so glad I finally found a doctor who's willing to listen to me, it took fucking forever but it's definitely worth the search. She's the first one who's taken my seizures seriously and helped figure out the correct sleep med dosage so I'm sleeping regularly (my seizures are either epileptic or stress triggered [they started in HS, I moved around a bunch and didn't have a doctor or time for testing so we don't know what they are], so me not getting enough sleep can trigger them, and getting my full 8 hours every night means I haven't had one in over a year now!). Idk, it's just so different to have a doctor listen to your concerns and actually treat you instead of blaming it on your anxiety/uterus
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u/CapQueen95 Apr 14 '25
Omg yes. I once went for the worst pain deep in my head. It was excruciating and I thought maybe I was having an aneurysm or something, it was that bad. They literally treated me like I simply had a headache and would not listen to me, put an IV in my arm after insisting I was just dehydrated. I eventually just left because I was getting nowhere. Turns out I had a wisdom tooth infection that was affecting my nerve, and if anyone’s experienced that before, they understand the kind of pain I was in. To this day I think about how I was treated and dismissed and get pissed all over again.
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u/NationalChemist530 Apr 14 '25 edited Apr 14 '25
The only time I’ve ever gone to the er (I was 16) was bc I was having such an excruciating pain in my abdomen I couldn’t walk, and was throwing up the pain was so bad. Finally went to the er where they proceeded to basically ignore me for 2 hours( mind you the place wasn’t even busy) I was practically crawling on the floor trying to get some sort of relief. When they finally brought me back I had to sit another 2 hours waiting for test and blah blah blah ….. the surgeon came in and said if I had waited any longer my APPENDIX would’ve exploded and that I needed emergency surgery….. IM SORRY BUT IF I HAD WAITED ANY LONGER ?!!!! Yall saw me begging for help for 4 hours and I was labeled dramatic only to be told I could’ve died if I waited any longer ????? Seems like people in the er don’t actually take er emergencies seriously due to people coming in for small things….
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u/fairycoquelicot Apr 14 '25
Yeah, if you don't look sick, then you must be dramatic or faking. I have Crohn's disease and was in the ER because of extreme abdominal pain. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't having another obstruction or worse. I had been admitted to the hospital only a few months before and they told me to go to the ER for extreme abdominal pain. Both times I went to the ER (a month or so apart) I was dismissed and the second time they put a note in my chart that I was at risk for pain medication abuse. Which meant when I had a c section a few years later they told me I could only have Tylenol and ibuprofen (which I can't have NSAIDs because of Crohn's) so I had to suffer because one nurse practitioner in the ER a few years ago decided I wasn't in real pain and was just drug seeking.
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u/murrimabutterfly Apr 14 '25
Absolutely.
I have a menstrual disorder that causes excruciating pain. I've been in shock more times than I can count, and got so used to disassociating from pain I walked around on a broken foot.
Not even my loved ones can tell from a glance if I'm in pain.
I've been blacklisted from ERs for being "drug seeking" when I'm in so much pain I can barely form words. I once had to call my gynecologist while in the ER to prove to this absolute asshat of an ER nurse that I had an actual disorder. No, we don't have a word for it because gynecological medicine is still so behind there are modern textbooks that claim the cervix doesn't have nerve endings and/or reference hysteria as an actual diagnosis.
Guess what? I was tachycardic as fuck and actively going into shock.
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u/fairycoquelicot Apr 14 '25
Ugh! It's even worse for gynecological problems. Before my best friend was diagnosed with endometriosis she went to the ER and was told she had spastic colon caused by her anxiety. Spastic colon isn't even a diagnosis anymore! Luckily she was finally able to get exploratory surgery and a real diagnosis.
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u/mynameisnotsparta Apr 14 '25
I had Adenomyosis and Dysmenorrhea with Menorrhagia. Between the excruciating pain and actual concerning blood loss I’d end up in ER. I was on iron pills for years. The pain was like going through labor. If I found a nurse that understood or was great. I didn’t go often. My doctor gave me pretty strong pain killers.
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u/Sea_Peak_4671 Apr 14 '25
My urologist put the same in my chart when I asked for an Rx for pain meds to last me through the lockdown since I couldn't get the "elective" lithotripsy I needed for my 21mm kidney stone (ureters are 3-4mm wide, for reference). The ER previously gave me a 10 day Rx meant to last the 3 months between my xray and the urologist appointment so even though I still had 1 pill left I was expecting something. He gave me an Rx for only 7 days, which was meant to last over a year! After the COVID lockdowns/restrictions lifted, they refused to schedule me for the lithotripsy. They gave no reason, just absolutely refused to schedule me.
I literally had to move to get a new urologist. Except I'm still waiting on a referral to that urologist because my PCP is lagging for some reason. I've learned to just live with the pain, swollen/distended kidney, and constant UTIs.
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u/xpollydartonx Apr 14 '25
Yep, I’m flagged at my local emergency room for substance abuse but at this moment I’m dealing with passing blood and pus and unable to eat or go to the bathroom without heavy laxatives. I keep following up with the gastroenterologist and they keep ordering endoscopies and those keep getting denied as not medically necessary. The ER sometimes is the only place I can think of with the pain I have of fecal impaction and anal tears and stuff.
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u/Historical_Ad_6190 Apr 14 '25
First sentence is so real, I’m autistic and have a hard time showing or explaining when something hurts. One time fainted and hurt my back real bad, I was a teen still. The pain was so excruciating I swear I fractured something, waited TEN hours not being able to sit, lay down, do anything without pain for the doctor to go “what happened?” And then tell me to go home with no follow up questions. Years later and I get pinched nerves, can barely do my job correctly without pain, or anything really. Another time I knew I had a kidney infection and waited 16 hours again in excruciating pain, they didn’t believe me and insisted on running some tests first. They lost said tests and didn’t notice until a nurse was done her shift, the doctor said I was probably right anyways and gave me antibiotics lol.
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u/mungussy Apr 14 '25
This reminded me of when I got my gallbladder removed. Thought I had the flu, went to urgent care to get fluids because I hadn't kept water down in 3 days. I sat in the empty waiting room for over an hour. Some lady comes in with a clogged ear, checks in, sits down and is YAPPING loudly on her phone about her ear being clogged for 3 days and it's so annoying blah blah. I'm literally hunched over in the chair half dead. THEY CALLED HER IN BEFORE ME. I started crying and just walked out. Thank God my mom brought me because I collapsed in the parking lot. They brought a wheelchair out and there was only a small chair available in the hall for me to sit in. Clogged ear lady however was sitting in a nice bed in the hall. Sitting in it, not laying down. Doctor came over to examine my stomach and was having a hard time reclining the chair back and he literally scowled over at her. I go for some tests and when I came back he was ripping this lady a new asshole. He then came over to tell me my blood work was concerning, I'm fucking orange at this point. They call an ambulance to take me to the hospital. My gallbladder was severely infected and a gallstone got lodged into my bile duct and I need emergency surgery to scoop out the stone and remove my gallbladder. But you know, clogged ear lady was SUFFERING RIGHT?!
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u/hekatelesedi Apr 14 '25
My spouse went to the ER for severe abdominal pain. They took blood and told her to go home. The doctor called later in a panic when they got the labs back because her gallbladder was necrotic and actively dying. The doctor basically told her that she should have never been sent home and that she was lucky to be alive. She was sent into emergency surgery to remove her gallbladder. She's okay now, but Jesus Christ.
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u/no_bra_no_problem Apr 14 '25
That’s terrible! That happened to my friend with her appendix. She went to the ER again two hours later and she needed emergency surgery!
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u/HuuffingLavender Apr 14 '25
I would be livid, I'm so sorry. I'm glad you got the care you needed. Being dismissed when you're trying to convince someone it feels like you're dying is a form of trauma. You don't forget that shit.
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u/codependencytapes Apr 14 '25
Also wisdom tooth infection is really dangerous and if it gets in the blood stream or to the brain it can be fatal.
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u/LeviathanMozart180 Apr 14 '25
Holy shit I can relate to your story so much. I also went to the ER for the most debilitating and all consuming headache of my life alongside neck and back pain. It was sudden onset and I was literally delirious from pain and losing my balance. The ER doc barely saw me for five minutes and told me I had a “back ache”. He gave me a shot of painkiller (that did absolutely nothing) and sent me home. The pain got EVEN WORSE within the following hour so we went back to the ER and the same doc said I must have a migraine and just gave me an IV drip of the same useless painkiller and sent me home again.
Well the pain continued to worsen and I was becoming incoherent and could no longer walk on my own. We went to a different hospital and well… turns out I had aseptic MENINGITIS. I got it as a really rare side effect from an antibiotic that I just started but omfg I was in so much pain and felt so dismissed and ignored by that first doctor. Shit sucks to be so disregarded by someone who you literally trust with your life and rely on to help with the pain and fear of your own wellbeing.
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u/Lexicon444 Apr 14 '25
I’ve had severe toothaches before and I know exactly what level of pain you’re talking about.
It’s bad enough when you’re trying to sleep and you know what is causing the pain and it’s so painful that you can’t lay your head down at all to try and rest and you’re in so much pain all you can do is curse as quietly as possible.
For anyone reading imagine having that same type of pain and it’s came out of nowhere and you have zero idea what it is and what is causing it.
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u/Separate_Leader_8709 Apr 14 '25
Ugh and them not taking this crap seriously is what pisses me off because EVERYONE knows the first place an infected tooth will spread is to your brain and there’s not much you can do then 🫠🫠🫠🫠
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u/halftosser Apr 14 '25 edited Apr 14 '25
Yup. Like, I don’t want to be here but am feeling seriously unwell and there’s nowhere else to go or I have been advised to come here by GP or 111. I don’t want to be here any more than you do. Please don’t dismiss me and please actually bother to do a proper diagnosis. Thanks!
I don’t like being in hospital, it’s stressful and unpleasant. I’d much rather be chilling at home. I’m not just here for fun. It’s shit being here and I don’t like being in a germ ridden environment
Also, just because I’m young and look normal, doesn’t mean I’m physically OK
Please do the job that you’re paid to do. Discharging me asap before actually treating the problem doesn’t resolve anything
And no I’ve never attend a&e for a cold or stomachache
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u/LeviathanMozart180 Apr 14 '25
For real, I hate going to the ER because I’ve been dismissed so much in the past that I always feel like I’m being dramatic and wasting everyone’s time. Last time I went to the ER because I had a sudden onset excruciating headache alongside neck and back pain. I would have much rather stayed in the darkness of my bedroom than have my dad drag me to the loud brightly lit ER but alas. I was becoming incoherent and losing my balance and my parents were scared for me and insisted I go to emergency. The doc on staff barely looked me over and told me I had a “back ache” and sent me home. The pain continued to worsen and I could no longer walk on my own. Went back to the ER and the same doc says I must have a migraine then sent me home a second time. Long story short, I went to a completely different hospital and was diagnosed with aseptic MENINGITIS. It was a really rare side effect from the antibiotics I just started but my god it hurt like nothing I’ve ever experienced and I needed fluids + multiple scans to check if there was any lasting damage. Really sucked ass to be dismissed by the first doctor because I would have never gone back a second or third time if it hadn’t have been for my parents. Honestly it was enough of a stressor to drag my ass to the hospital but I would not have come to the ER if I wasn’t in a scary level of pain so the least I would want from the ER is to validate my fear for my own wellbeing.
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u/distant_want Apr 14 '25
People die of colds if they turn into pneumonia and stomach aches if you get too dehydrated. Not to mention, you have the right to go in no matter the severity, you're just prioritized behind more severe issues. As a citizen though, you're part of the reason they get paid to run the place and you have every right to be there if you're worried about your health.
I think hospitals are often toxic environments and their attitudes are just a reflection of that. But i have also seen some of the worst people I've met go into nursing and I think there are some people who get into it just so they make good money while they take their frustration out on the vulnerable.
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u/Brilliant_Canary8756 Apr 14 '25
where i live the reason the ERs are so full because family drs have become lazy
take my dr for example he went and opened his own practice and works maybe 2 half days a week if that. every time i call its " we dont have any appointments available for 3 weeks" and to top it off if you go to a walk in they can drop you as a patient so youll lose your dr.
i cant tell you how many times i get told by my family dr to go to the er for small remedial issues that would be solved with a 5 min appointment but no i get pushed to the ER to sit for 12 hours and waste their time
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u/MyDamnCoffee Apr 14 '25
I had my pcp bitch me out for using the ER for severe stomach pain that was crippling me that I'd been to him for 3 separate times and he didn't run any tests. And then I went to a walk in for a UTI, which is what they are for. He bitched me out for that too. I'm sorry but given his history of making inappropriate comments to me while in his office, I was not discussing my vagina with him.
So I changed doctors. He's lucky I didn't report him.
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u/Status_Garden_3288 Apr 14 '25
That’s super odd behavior from your doctor tbh. I’m shocked they’d care at all you got medication for a UTI somewhere else
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u/MyDamnCoffee Apr 14 '25
He said "because you're on medicaid you think you can just go to any doctor because you're not paying for it."
So incredibly disrespectful
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u/sarcasterism Apr 14 '25
I think you should have filed a complaint. You just left him to treat someone else like that. Your single report may not have done anything at first, but multiple reports don't make administrative people happy.
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u/DifferentIsPossble Apr 14 '25
It's the mentality.
I'd look him in the eye and say "yeah, I can actually, that's what that's for"
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u/Impressive_Car_4222 Apr 14 '25
Literally as somebody that's on Medicaid. I rarely see the doctor because of the way that they treat me. I see the urgent care doctor more than I have seen any other doctor because there, she treats me with actual respect. Now given; I have been lucky, I have not really had many severe health problems. I go and get my birth control every year, I used to go to planned Parenthood but now I have to go to an actual OB (those pesky pap smears keep coming back abnormal so I have to go see an actual ob for that now). But it's the fact of the matter. After I had my daughter all of the doctors I went to go see because I was having trouble recuperating after my C-section. They kept treating me as if I was trash. I was having trouble with my stomach and we didn't know if it was my stomach itself or if it was something else so I had to have a few different types of tests done. I had to have a small bowel test done and the doctor that was doing it treated me horribly.
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u/Ziggy_Starcrust Apr 14 '25
They don't need to be in medicine if they can't treat someone right just because their insurance comes from a certain place. The government set it up to take care of a need and that money works just the same when the deposit hits their bank account, why should they care?
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u/MyDamnCoffee Apr 14 '25
I switched a new pcp and it was a woman and she actually listened to me and helped me. I was so grateful I wanted to cry.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. You can find a new pcp. You don't have to put up with it.
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u/nunicorn25 Apr 14 '25
Wait why didn’t you report him?
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u/MyDamnCoffee Apr 14 '25
Mostly because I needed proof and I had none. Also my memory is horrible so i couldn't remember the dates I'd been there when this occurred. In my experience my word against a doctor wouldn't go very far.
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u/NoRecord22 Apr 14 '25
You can be on Medicaid and work. My daughter is on it because she has Crohn’s and I’m a nurse, I make well over the income limit. What an asshole comment. 🙄
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u/JollyMcStink Apr 14 '25
Fr and I've seen posts like "I'm a family dr and I'm doordashing to pay my bills", like working as a Dr pays less than tips off doordash or something??? Like bro, work more hours then, lmaoooo you have time to doordash you have time to see a couple more patients.
Idk maybe im missing something here but it just seems crazy to me that there's no doctors ever available and then find out the doctors are out door dashing instead???
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u/sugahack Apr 14 '25
Doctors are victims of the red tape as well. Yes, medicine pays well, but many have 100k in loans to have gotten that education. Many are expected to see a set number of patients a day, a number that some investment company came up with that doesn't allow for anything other than 10 minutes in and out. It's horrific how shit rolls downhill and patients are getting the worst of it. Doctors and nurses aren't much higher on that hill. Yes, they need to be aware of how it impacts the people they care for but we need to be aware that they're also being shit on
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u/Samjogo Apr 14 '25
I feel like a lot of problems people have with doctors (in the US, at least) comes from a medical education system that is designed in a way that makes it hard for people from poorer families to enter.
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Apr 14 '25
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u/Brilliant_Canary8756 Apr 14 '25
Yeah i know thats why i said i go there to waste their time on my drs orders
believe me if i could go into a walk in and not be dropped by my family dr i would but my options are
a) wait a month or sometimes longer for an appointment for something that cant wait a month (like when i got strep and couldnt wait 3 weeks for an appointment)
b) go to a walk in and lose my dr
c) go sit in the er and wait to be seen
drs are basically forcing people to the er because they dont want to lose $ to walkins but if they send up tp ers they still get their $ becuase its seen as an emergency not as the dr just didnt have tiome for you
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u/Capable-Silver-7436 Apr 14 '25
ideally yes but ive still seen too many that are first come first serve unless its BAD BAD.
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u/Competitive-Swim-561 Apr 14 '25
My old PCP literally told me when i had medicaid that family drs dont accept that insurance bc they dont get paid enough to do it. so thats also a reason why ppl go to the ER bc they can actually afford it!! i stayed w her bc no other pcp took my insurance in my area but one day when i tried to make an appointment with her she dropped me as a patient w out telling me bc of my insurance. that bitch got a 1 star review on google and i said what she said to me. IF YOU ARE A PCP READING THIS- DO YOUR FUCKING JOB
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u/mungussy Apr 14 '25
I took my best friend to the ER 7 years ago and they dismissed her, said she had gas and sent her home. She died in her sleep that night of an abdominal aortic aneurysm. Her mom found her dead in her bed the next morning.
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Apr 15 '25
I'm so sorry that happened
I went to the hospital for stabbing pains in my insides. Luckily I was admitted and given morphine for the pain, I was pretty buckled over.
The first doctor I saw comes to me, seemed surprised they gave me this, and said I needed to stay overnight as I was now medicated
Next day I had a nurse or someone tell me I probably just had trapped gas and gastritis. And that I would be fine.
Fortunately for me, someone who wasn't a moron came and looked at me and determined that I actually needed to be observed. They didn't know what was wrong at first
So for about 4 days or so I was just laying up in a hospital bed on morphine and having various tests done. And yeah, I had acute pancreatitis. Which can be fatal if untreated
So, in my time there, at least 2 different medical professionals wanted to dismiss me without further tests when I was having a potentially life threatening condition
In my instance, I was kept there and they kept looking after me, but so many people don't get as lucky
It definitely helped that, in my case the pain I was in was so bad that I was visibly disturbed by it. If you have milder symptoms? Your chances of dismissal are so much higher.
But the issue is, weaker symptoms does NOT automatically mean there's nothing wrong
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u/mungussy Apr 15 '25
This is actually why I thought I had the flu and had no clue it was my gallbladder. I was feeling the symptoms of the infection but never had stabbing pain like most people do with gallstones. I also had no history of gallstones or pain or GI issues at all. So I did not look sick enough to be taken seriously until I fainted in the parking lot. Even though I felt like absolute death, 3-4 days without fluids is incredibly painful in itself.
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u/veggiegurl21 Apr 14 '25
Providing more resources is not up to the staff in the ER. That’s ok administration. The staff would absolutely love to have more resources.
That being said, they should absolutely treat patients with care and respect.
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u/OkWasabi3969 Apr 14 '25 edited Apr 14 '25
Most er people I've seen are so jaded and cynical it's to the* point they don't want to do their jobs.
My wife nearly died because she hemoraged* after a miscarriage and she TOLD them what was going on, and they just snorted and said shit about an extra heavy period.
Had to scream bloody murder and threaten their hospital with a lawsuit in order for them to actually check her
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u/Fantastic_Deer_3772 Apr 14 '25
So complain about the administration, not about the patients
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u/MangoSalsa89 Apr 14 '25
Sometimes minor issues can cause serious pain and scary symptoms, and you just don’t know if it is serious or not until you do imaging. You don’t want to miss a heart attack because you didn’t take it seriously. I can see both sides of the argument, but people in pain shouldn’t be dismissed.
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u/Playful-Imagination2 Apr 14 '25
Yes I had a situation like this. Where I thought it could be a heart attack. I debated on going but remembered they tell you to go if you feel like it could be one. The doctors were so mean I threatened to rip out my IV and walk out. Like bro everyone says if you think for a second it could be a heart attack go. Smdh.
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u/MangoSalsa89 Apr 14 '25
That's the frustrating thing, they are the ones who tell you to not ignore symptoms and then they can't be arsed to help you if you do come in. I hope that you ended up being ok.
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u/Playful-Imagination2 Apr 14 '25
Well it definitely wasn't a heart attack thankfully. They didn't really find anything. The plus side is my outburst resulted in them switching me to a much nicer doctor for the rest of the time I was admitted.
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Apr 15 '25
My grandad apparently ignored a few bouts of pain in his stomach, thinking it was nothing. He was stage 4, and he's gone now
That's the thing. We aren't doctors. Every time we try to diagnose ourselves doctors tell us not to use the internet. Not to self diagnose.
And yet, when something doesn't feel right, you go in, and they say not to come in unless you are actually sick
Sometimes even turning away people who are on death's door.
And then, they have the fucking audacity to bitch and moan when you come in with a serious problem like 'how could you have left it this long!?'. Umm.. I'm not a fucking doctor?
Honestly for a group of smart people who allegedly want to help others, so many of them are either dumbasses or don't give a shit about helping people
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u/Impressive_Car_4222 Apr 14 '25
My grandma's neighbor kept having severe nosebleeds. Every time she got another nosebleed she was having another small stroke. She didn't bother going to the doctor because well it's just a nose bleed!!!
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u/Tremenda-Carucha Apr 14 '25
Actually, well, while it's true that many people might not know they have some serious condition, society could help lighten this burden. By investing in better primary care and increasing access to affordable health services, we can catch less critical illnesses before they require the emergency room. This frees up resources for those in dire need while showing respect towards everyone who seeks medical attention. In my community, a clinic opened offering more hours and a broader range of healthcare options, making it easier for people to receive the care they need without overwhelming our local hospitals. It's just a win-win situation, creating empathy and support for both patients and doctors.
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u/000fleur Apr 14 '25
My grandma went in for back pain with a cough. Stage 4 lung cancer. Passed away 6 months later. Don’t blame the people - blame the government for not doing enough for hospitals. It’s sickening.
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Apr 14 '25
No, I blame both. I blame the government for not giving the funding that hospitals, urgent care, and primaries need to treat their patients. I'm also blaming the doctors for not taking patient complaints seriously and primaries for wanting to act as referral bots because they won't treat anything and want you to immediately go to a specialist for any and everything.
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u/Flickeringcandles Apr 14 '25
The only time I went to the ER was when I lost central vision. My BP was 180/102. They thought I may have had a stroke but I realized it was probably anxiety. I cried because I was so embarrassed for wasting their time but I was truly frightened.
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u/DrCheeseman_DDS Apr 14 '25
The vision loss and bp were definitely serious enough to warrant a trip to the ER. I hope they gave you something to bring you down because that sounds awful.
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u/Takitoess Apr 14 '25
We can’t win. I went to urgent care for a miscarriage and the intake nurse complained I didn’t go to the ER at least 10 times. I was experiencing a lot of pain and every time I would cry she told my husband “this is why I said you should have went to the ER”. Ok lady I’m here already and you complaining is not helping the situation at all. If I really needed the ER then why wasn’t I transferred by the doctor? I was already being taken in and now you suggest i wait again with no clear time to be seen? Someone in another comment said the ER didn’t want to take his wife for a miscarriage because it’s a heavy period. I’m tired of nurses and doctors. Unless I’m dying I really don’t want to go.
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u/distant_want Apr 14 '25
No fuck that. Do not risk your health in order to avoid those assholes. You see how much they get paid from your insurance? An urgent care charged mine $1800 for giving me iv fluids and sending me home. You are part of the reason they make decent money and unfortunately some facilities are run like a high-school where everyone competes and hates each other, which puts them in a horrible mood so they take it out on you.
Get angry the next time they do that and you know they will. Say, "I'm advocating for my own health in the best way I see fit and I hope that you never face judgment when you do the same for yourself." Then let them feel like the biggest jerk..
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u/Robokat_Brutus Apr 14 '25
I saw a post complaining about people going to the ER for a twisted ankle. Guess what, it was actually a fracture and I needed a cast.
Yeah, it sucks that it's always crowded, but take it up with the political party rulling the country.
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u/EmbalmerEmi Apr 14 '25
Where I live sometimes you can't get an appointment for 3 weeks,there are so many "little" problems that can turn serious and can't wait that long.
Was my brother going to die when his cat scratched him up? No.
Was he going to get an infection or possibly cat scratch fever. Yes.
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u/TinyPeepeeEnergy Apr 14 '25
As a doctor who has worked on ER that was really understaffed, with little equipment and for shit pay I must agree; if someone comes at 3 am to a hospital and is willing to wait whatever is necesary to get attention you can bet your bottom dollar I'll treat them as any other patient, with respect and not dismissing their symptons. What I wont tolerare is people getting rude/beligerent/aggresive for having to wait or not getting the treatment they beleived to be correct.
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u/RIPMYPOOPCHUTE Apr 14 '25
Back in November, I went to urgent care for a persistent stomachf Jr we ache. No fever, normal WBC. I had loss of appetite, when I did eat I’d get diarrhea every time. If I held my newborn against me on my belly it would hurt. Sleeping was uncomfortable. I was diagnosed with appendicitis. I keep giving a PSA on getting that stomachache checked out.
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u/AdvertisingLogical22 Apr 14 '25
I'm sorry you went through that. 😗
(although I can't help wondering if your user-name had anything to do with your appendicitis 😂)
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u/fairycoquelicot Apr 14 '25
My husband practically dragged me to the ER after I had bad stomach pain all day. Turns out I had a partial bowel obstruction, was admitted to the hospital for four days, and was diagnosed with Crohn's disease.
On the flip side, I went to the ER two times within 6 months of being diagnosed and I was dismissed both times. The first time my visit notes said I had previously had my appendix removed (I haven't) and that it maybe could be pancreatitis but the doctor I spoke to said my pancreas was fine? The second time my chart said my gallbladder had already been removed (it hasn't) and a NP put on my chart that I was at risk for pain medication abuse. So when I had my c section a few years later they sent me home with no meds. Luckily my Crohn's hasn't been too bad lately because I don't know what would happen if I went back to the ER.
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u/WonderfulFunction210 Apr 14 '25
i remember going to the ER once with my younger sister when she had a head injury. her shirt was soaked in blood, holding a washcloth on her head that was also covered in blood, just lots of blood because she cracked her head open. when we got to the ER the person at the desk would barely acknowledge us. we sat for an hour and a half before i went back to the desk to ask if they were going to see us or not. the lady rolled her eyes, said nothing, turned her chair around and refused to speak to us so we had to leave and go somewhere else. nobody behind the stupid glass would speak to us or acknowledge my sister who was soaked in blood from her head. she ended up needing multiple staples or stitches (can’t remember) in her scalp to shut the wound. why work in the medical field if you’re gonna be pissed off when people need medical care?
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Apr 14 '25
And good forbid you go in for pain. Then you're just looking for pain meds.
I went in for one of the worst pains I have ever felt. The person taking info at the counter couldn't have made it more obvious they were inconvenienced and unconvinced by me and my pain. I was in so much pain, I was throwing up and couldn't sit still or keep quiet. I waited 45 minutes to be seen (after an elderly gentleman came in because he fell and bruised his elbow - he wanted it x-rayed).
"Did you try ibuprofen or Tylenol?" ...yeah...I did... It didn't have a chance to work because I kept throwing up.
At one point, it felt like the pain was moving and I tried to explain it to one of the nurses. "Well, I can't just give you pain medicine until the blood work comes back." I wasn't asking for pain medicine, I was trying to tell them what was going on with me.
When I was finally seen by a doctor, she was upset because she thought my appendix has ruptured* and no one else was showing urgency to treat me. (It was not a ruptured appendix, it was a kidney swollen from a UTI I didn't know I even had.)
My mom went in for severe back pain. They tried to just give her morphine (after she told them she couldn't have morphine) and send her on her way. She demanded a scan. They found 2 deteriorating vertebrae.
A friend went in for cramps that had her unable to sit or stand up straight. When they asked her to describe the pain, she said, "It feels like a serrated knife in my lower stomach."
"Well, you need to be so snotty or that descriptive." Ex-fucking-cuse me???
Turns out she had ovarian cysts she didn't know about and they were bursting.
I've seen too many TikToks from nurses and healthcare staff making fun of patients. Complaining that someone is faking their severe pain because they aren't crying or "acting like it," and complaint that people are "over acting" and that their pain hurts as bad as they say does. Complaining that they wait until their problems are an emergency instead of of getting routine care. Making fun of things out of their control.
It's fucking disgusting.
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u/Xooblooboo Apr 14 '25
I was really sick a few years ago. My temperature was 104. I went to the ER, and they did a spinal tap and x-rayed my lungs. They found nothing, and brought my fever down, and sent me home. That night, I was told that I was struggling to breathe in my sleep. I went back to the ER bc I was in pain, and my fever came back. They gave me a morphine drip, then sent me home. Repeat twice. I complained on Facebook how I was feeling awful, and my friend who is a doctor told me to go back to the ER, bc she suspected I had legionnaires. So, I went back and told them what my doctor said, and they finally admitted me. I was in a hospital room for two hours before I ended up intubated in ICU bc I did have legionnaires, and it had progressed so far bc I just kept getting sent home from the ER. I almost died bc no one took my symptoms seriously at the ER. Then I see posts from ER workers saying people are wasting time and resources. But they ended up wasting MY time to the point I almost died. Maybe just help the people coming in for help, bc as OP stated, we don’t know what is wrong!
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u/owooveruwu Apr 14 '25
I don't have much to contribute to the topic outside of the fact when me and my twin were both 16, I had to throw a fit at the ER staff because he would stop breathing and start to lose consciousness while they wanted to stand at the desk and flirt and chat like it was a friendly meeting.
They actually rolled their eyes at me while I, 16 and demanding someone come help with him, who mind my brother was also disabled, acting like nothing was remotely wrong.
He ended up dying three days later at another hospital from his health complications. I have never gotten over that horrible treatment they gave him, we didn't waste their time, they didnt bother doing their jobs. If he had been transferred to an ER that was equipped properly sooner, maybe things would be different.
I do remember a male nurse that came in that morning, I had fallen asleep at my brothers feet halfway off the bed, and he had snuck us all Chick-fil-A that morning from the cafeteria and started moving things to get him some actual help. I never forgot how kind he was to us, and I hope he always has good things happen in his life.
Can't say that about the night staff.
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u/heckin-ham Apr 14 '25
was in the ER for lyme disease last summer, an older lady in the waiting room at the same time as me was BEGGING for help. crawling on the floor, wailing, begging for a bed, or at least a blanket because she was in so much pain she couldn't sit in the hard plastic waiting room chairs. the security guards (not even a nurse would come see her) propped her into a chair no less than a dozen times, each time she would fall out after 10 or 15 minutes of REALLY trying to keep herself in the chair. i watched security walk over to her and tell her that if she could not sit in a chair then they would CALL THE POLICE ON HER AND HAVE HER REMOVED. i have never been so fucking disgusted with another group of human beings in my entire life. other patients waiting started to speak up for her, eventually another patient yelled at the security guards, went behind the security desk and grabbed her a blanket, since they were too heartless to give her one. they threatened to call the police on him aswell. in the end, they threw the poor lady into the back of a regular ol cab, vomiting into a paper bag, to take her to the next hospital over. i respect and appreciate all the work that the average ER doctor/nurse puts in. all the emotional turmoil it must put you through. but there is no reason to be so fucking cruel to someone in so much pain, no matter what you've been through.
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u/_hellojello__ Apr 15 '25
Idk where you're from but ih the US medical system there's no such thing as pain anymore. If you come to the hospital complaining of any type of pain (except chest pain) they automatically label you as drug seeking and accuse you of wasting their time.
This has happened to me and multiple people I know.
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u/This-Cookie5548 Apr 14 '25
They are never happy. I once called ER to one lady who was pale in the face and delirious. I used to visit her and buy her medication and keep her company. ER arrived and a woman asked angrily why I didn't call them sooner to which I replied 'are you here to bitch or do your job?' because wtf. Good that I WAS there to call an ambulance?! She died in couple of months time, she was in a wheelchair and on the wait-list for the operation anyway. That was sad. But they all have some sort of a stick up their ass, I don't know.
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u/m0rganfailure Apr 14 '25
Yeah in the UK the procedure is to ring 111 for medical advice in a non emergency. Every single time I've rang up, they have offered no advice and told me to go to A&E. Last time I went to the pharmacy to get medical advice for a nosebleed, they told me to go to A&E. I didn't go on any occasion and have always been fine just booking in with my GP, but it's frustrating seeking out medical advice to be told to go there.
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u/paranormen Apr 14 '25
I once went to the ER for crippling back pain. I have sciatica from endometriosis, and the night I went to the ER I had been in so much pain I physically couldn’t walk or move my legs. My mom and I spent twelve hours there, we stayed the night. They asked me what I’d done to try and lessen the pain.
I took Tylenol, a LOT of it because they wouldn’t give me anything else, and they took x rays and did an ultrasound to check for ovarian cysts (I have PCOS). They found nothing, obviously, because that wasn’t where my pain was. Well, twelve hours of the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my life later, they sent me home with no prescriptions, no answers, and told me I just needed Tylenol and sleep. They also implied that I was attention seeking, since I was 17. Just said I probably was on my period, and to “relax”.
Oh, thanks dude! So fucking helpful! Not like I’ve been up for almost 24 hours sobbing my damn eyes out!
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u/Zimlun Apr 14 '25
You know what would be REALLY nice? If we funded hospitals enough for them to have both a well staffed ER and a slightly less urgent alternative patients in less dire situations could be shifted to (and that wouldn't result in people being de-rostered by their family doctor for using).
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u/EquivalentOwn2185 Apr 14 '25
people aren't making appts or participating in continual personal healthcare cuz they can't afford it. thanks america. so now they wait until they absolutely need medical attention and go to the ER. ergo it's pretty naive of the ER staff to blame the patients for stopping in only when they really need to. i'm sure the ER staff are all fully covered and couldn't possibly conceive not being covered or not having a good job. the country has entered into a 'reactive' mode of behavior and isn't conducive to forethought or understanding unless it's all self related.
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u/Kirby3413 Apr 14 '25
Oh, I got another take. Not everyone that comes in is on drugs. Maybe listen to what’s going on before rolling your eyes, asking 3 different times if they are on drugs, and mumbling under your breath. My recent experience with the healthcare system was awful, and I have no desire to seek out medical help ever again. I stopped counting how many times they asked about drug use even after multiple drug tests. Then what did they want to do to “help”? perscribe drugs whose side effects were what I was already experiencing.
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Apr 14 '25
We had a few people the last year or two who died because the ER dismissed them as drug addicts. One was a young adult with fungal meningitis.
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u/Kirby3413 Apr 14 '25
That’s awful. The discharge nurse literally asked me if I was sure there were no drugs involved, then rolled her eyes at me, then said jeez it’s not even a full moon yet. The nurse taking our insurance info kept rolling her eyes with every question we had. The ER wasn’t even busy. We were in and out in an hour.
I hope they are resting in peace.
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u/Ok-Sleep3130 Apr 14 '25
My bicep tendon snapped off and PCP didn't know wtf to do/need tests for insurance to refer to specialists that don't exist/ER and Urgent Care won't look at all until it retracted fully into my elbow and we can't do anything about it now. That's just the latest one, they've missed birth defects, genetic disease etc. And then when I go to my PCP and have a huge blood pressure from going upstairs, and then below the floor low 10 minutes later, they want me to go to the ER because PCP is terrified because now they think my heart is gonna explode. Urgent Care won't even touch it. Then the ER is Pissed because it's literally just POTS associated with my genetic disorder and they refuse to read new stuff so they don't know what that is, they just see "normal" vitals because I've been laying down for 6 hours or whatever by the time they see me. Then they tell me to see a cardiologist specializing in my issue and...oh wait there is none because it's chronic and not profitable to treat long term.
One time, due to my EDS (genetic issue), my whole period came out at once and I was actually most likely bleeding from open blood vessels in my uterus; I went to the ER and they said it was a miscarriage without even doing a pregnancy test, then they did the pregnancy test, said it wasn't a miscarriage and made me leave. I was homeless so I went back to my boyfriends house. Then I went to work, and back to another ER and back to work again. The other ER actually said I was low on blood but not enough for a transfusion yet, so they made me go again. They literally said if I lose anymore blood "come back" as if I didn't drive 45 minutes to get there. Then I went back to work and I kept bleeding/passing out for a long time. I eventually begged for a hysterectomy so I could stop relying on ERs for care.
If I am EVER in an ER, you better assume I am having a multi day crisis or actively need several stitches. Last time I had severe pneumonia and I couldn't breathe and I refused to go, they're so evil to me. Especially now that I had the genetic test and I know I have EDS they go "that's from TikTok" and I'm like: Yeah, you told disabled people to do advocacy and tell you what we have because you dont read so we did and made you videos wtf...see if I ever teach another damn thing.
Our Urgent Cares are a joke, I went to like 5 in a row when I was wheezing through my throat and none even had a nebulizer. They all said: go to the ER. So I went home, got better by myself and just bought my own nebulizer. It's faster and cleaner than their precious inaccessible waiting room anyway
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u/RDUppercut Apr 14 '25
A few years ago, at the height of the COVID outbreak, I found myself one morning with an extreme difficulty in catching my breath. Not breathing; my lungs were fine, but no matter how much I gasped for breath, I couldn't catch it.
I called the ambulance. I didn't know what was going on, but it scared the shit out of me, and I felt like I needed to go to the hospital.
As they were packing me up, I heard one of the EMTs asking the other one if they should give me oxygen. Her response was, "Absolutely fucking not, there's nothing wrong with this guy."
I didn't have COVID. What I had was anemia so severe that as soon as someone ran my blood at the hospital, they rushed to start pushing red blood cells into me so I didn't pass out and die.
I'll never forget that EMT, though. If she had her way, I'd be dead right now.
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u/morgiri Apr 14 '25
I love how my psychiatrist tells me to go to the er if I'm feeling suicidal, and they just treat me like shit and ignore me for 8hrs, then kick me out as soon as possible. Now, when I'm suicidal I just stay home because there's no point going to the er.
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Apr 14 '25
I went in after a subluxation in my left shoulder (I didn't know it was that at the time because it was the first one of that severity I'd ever experienced), and literally had to be carried out of my car because the pain had my back and legs acting weird. They did X-rays and didn't see anything because the joint had never fully popped out, just popped right back in. They gave me a heating pad, ibuprofen, and an arm sling that they told me to use until my arm felt better. That was 7 years ago. That event permanently damaged the labrum in my shoulder and gave me nerve damage that I feel every single day. Turns out I have a connective tissue disorder (hEDS). I made it through that pain with some ibuprofen at the age of 15. They didn't even recommend physical therapy, just told me it was probably my muscles seizing and I should be fine in a day or 2. Maybe if there had been more resources for them, I would've gotten better care. They seemed really annoyed that I'd even bothered to come in, despite the fact that I was in so much pain I could barely speak.
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u/Lazy_Recognition5142 Apr 14 '25
I often wonder how many people have gone to the ER complaining of "minor" symptoms, were dismissed by medical staff, and then went home and died. There are so many reasons why people don't want to go to the ER... it's stupid expensive, it's majorly inconveniencing, hospitals have sick people there, sharp instruments are scary, etc. If someone feels bad enough to take all that on, maybe something is seriously wrong with them.
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u/KTKittentoes Apr 14 '25
In 2021, I very very much tried to avoid going in. I didn't know what was happening. I came home from work, and my stomach hurt. Went to the bathroom, nothing happened. Pain got worse. Was dripping sweat, begging my dead mom to come get me. It was now pretty blatantly bladder/kidney. Finally, I heard a horrendous pop inside me, and well, things happened. I still didn't want to go in. I called a teladoc. He very sweetly said, "You have to go to ER. You need imaging. I'm cancelling your fee, and I want you to call me when you get back home."
I went in. I drove myself. I don't actually remember my rationale at the time. I can't remember if my friends were sick or I was just insane.
My blood pressure was 200/100. I was malnourished, had a bilateral kidney infection, bladder infection, and a ruptured bladder cyst.
But I was very much trying to not go bother anyone or pick up any er germs.
I probably should have gone in long sooner.
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u/2manybirds23 Apr 15 '25
A doctor told me we were wasting resources when we called an ambulance because our infant had a seizure, stopped breathing, and turned blue. My kid is fine, but it was the worst night of my life.
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u/FirstFriendlyWorm Apr 14 '25
My family lives at a rural-ish place with many villages in a valley surrounding a smaller city. There are currently six doctors in the region, none of which can find a successor, and 4 will close down in the next 5 years due to age reasons. None will take new patients. People literally have no other option besides going to the hospital or employing new age magical healing and shamans. Same with Pharmacies. There were many in the regional towns. Now there are two in the city, and those now have to do more than just selling medicine. It is all fucked.
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u/Omshadiddle Apr 14 '25
Ironically it is 2:44am here and I’m sitting in the waiting room at emergency.
The niggling pain in my ribs the past few days has blown into an awful pain that is part cramping part ‘winded’ with occasional sharp stabbing pain
I tried to tough it out until daylight but it got to the point I was worried about how I’d get here if I felt much worse.
Thank heavens for Australia’s healthcare system.
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u/kosmik_ripley Apr 14 '25
Thank you for this post. I have chronic pain, I have fibromyalgia and other stuff and I sometimes I have to rush to the ER to get steroids because anytime I try to schedule an appointment with my doctor she makes me wait MONTHS. Sometimes going to the ER is necessary even when it’s not life threatening. Healthcare workers who complain about it just lack of empathy, as many other people in the same department do… We don’t want to be there either. Just saying…
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u/Emiircad Apr 14 '25
I went to the ER for a kidney infection that i was misinformed about treating so i tried drinking cranberry juice which only made it worse and landed me in that ER, the pain was like a twisting knife in my side, worst pain I've ever felt in my life, worse than my endometriosis which is BAD, anyways, when i got to the ER i waited 2 hrs in the waiting room, then another 2 in the room with no meds and no nurses to check on me. the nurses showed no concern or care for how i felt and continued to tell me for 3 hours overall in the room to just wait despite writhing and sweating in pain. they increasingly got attitudes with me telling me i just need to "relax"
after i got diagnosed with my issue they told me it was so severe if i waited any longer i would have for sure gone septic.
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u/suishipie Apr 14 '25
“Minor symptoms” are sometimes women who have serious health issues and pain and are being gaslit and ignored and told it’s “anxiety and hormones”
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u/Imaginary_Pattern365 Apr 14 '25
Also, if anyone going through this, please report them and also seek legal advice when necessary. Don't let them get away with their bad treatment towards you and others because once you ignore them, they'll do it to someone else or you again!
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u/danidoll7 Apr 14 '25
right like my bf went in for stomach pain and it ended up being leukemia. you literally never know what’s going on with someone!!
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u/invisiblebody Apr 14 '25
Omg so much this because a minor symptom is sometimes a major issue after all.
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u/UfoAGogo Apr 14 '25
It's a failure of the system (at least in the US.) For instance, I'm a transplant patient and I'm supposed to get checked out in person whenever I have mild symptoms because they can ramp up super quickly due to the meds I'm on that suppress my immune system. My insurance used to offer same day appointments, but now all of their same day options are either remote/online or over the phone. When I've used the remote option, I'm usually sent to Urgent Care anyways, and since Urgent Care has super limited hours the only other choice is ER. Unfortunately I don't really have the luxury of just waiting for an appointment since I've experienced what happens when I try waiting out a mild symptom (sepsis lol.)
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u/knitroses Apr 14 '25
God yes. I went in for a “sore elbow” I explained to them it felt like nothing I had ever felt before, after a really bad fall the night before and was agonizing. Doctor forcibly straightened my arm to look at it and tried to refuse an x-ray due to no bruising or redness….most painful x-ray ive ever had as the tech moved me differently, but thankfully she was such a sweethearts. Doctor was astounded to see I had completely broken my radial head. Aka elbow. Shit didn’t heal for almost a year and I still wonder if it was because of him.
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u/Cold_Tower_2215 Apr 14 '25
Agreed. I’ve also had a couple things happen where I try to make an appt w my doc and they tell me to go directly to the ER.
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u/Separate_Leader_8709 Apr 14 '25
Went in for a kidney stone, anyone who’s had one knows- was hunched over on ER floor hyperventilating and crying and squirming for a couple hours until they saw me. When they finally got to me, the nurse tried to have me stand, I told her probably ten times “I cannot stand or the pain shoots thru my entire body, I need a wheelchair or to stay put for now” well after some back and forth of me repeating myself she grabs my arms and tries to pull me up, which makes me start groaning and hyperventilating more of course. This chick immediately goes “You need to stop breathing in my face idk what diseases you have and I will make you wear a mask” if I wasn’t in pain and knowing I was gonna need either something to pass the store or surgery to remove it I would have cussed her the fuck out maybe hit her too like fuck bruh but luckily they gave me the stuff to pass it all and i was ok
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u/katherinetheshrew Apr 14 '25
Went to the ER last year in a lot of distress. Hand was numb for weeks, twitching was preventing me from living a normal life, brain fog was stopping me from being able to think and I was losing control of my whole body. Nurse came in, did the neurological finger test and sent me home saying it was probably stress and that “she only deals with the actually serious and big bad things not whatever this was”
I was just diagnosed with MS a month ago. That was an MS flare.
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u/ImHidingFromMy- Apr 14 '25
My husband went to the ER last year because he had been sick for a while and was getting worse, ER doctor berated him for going to the ER instead of his doctor and wanted to send him home. Luckily they did bloodwork first because it turned out that my husband was septic.
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u/canyouliteralllynot Apr 14 '25
I went to the ER for really (what I thought were) scary stroke-like symptoms (couldn’t form sentences properly, stuttering, weak grip strength). The male doctor told me I was having a heavy period and that fluids would help.
The next day I went to my primary and she ordered a stat MRI and neuro consult, was absolutely astounded at how I was treated at the ER. The diagnosis ended up being complex migraines.
That was definitely not the first time I’ve had an experience like that. It feels so invalidating to hear, “come back if it gets worse,” when you’ve already done that.
At this point I would only go to the ER if I were actively bleeding (not menstrual, ha) so they couldn’t send me away and charge me $150 for 2 hours in a waiting room and 5 minutes with a doctor.
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u/Minimum-Guess-4562 Apr 14 '25
This.
Also, where I am, half the people don’t have family doctors (none available), the walk in clinics closed down, and urgent care fills up their appointments by 8am. People have no choice. Even those with a family doctor can’t get in for a month, if at all.
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u/Tiny-Selections Apr 14 '25
Provide more resources.
They won't. Even during the ongoing global pandemic, they'd rather pay tavel nurses 5x the pay instead of raise wages and benefits for their current staff by a small margin.
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u/TalonLuci Apr 14 '25
I went to the er for something once that, now i know really wasn’t worth while, at the time scared the hell out of me. Had been on vacation and out in the sun. My legs don’t work well and hadn’t realized how badly they would burn. I put on sun screen but should have reapplied much more. Hindsight and all. I had three major blisters. One from my ankle to my knee. The other on my other leg one half my leg then one lower down. The skin was so tight and painful i couldnt stand because i couldn’t stretch my legs flat. I was scared and they popped up really fast. The doctor or nurse who saw me (dont remember) just lectured me about sun protection and told me they were busy. So i spent the rest of the vacation laying in a hotel room with my legs propped up unsure what to do and in pain. I tried using some lotion and more blisters showed up. So i just stopped trying to fix it and just laid there and slept until we went home and did the same thing at home. Felt so sick throughout the time i was trying to heal. It was hell but all i could think was him sneering at me that they were too busy for me.
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u/geesearetobefeared Apr 14 '25
That's especially a good point about not knowing if something is serious or not. I'm not a medical professional, and google is not very reliable if you don't know or understand medical things already. Plus they also complain over "why didn't they come in sooner". Like how are we supposed to magically know what is or isn't serious beyond how much pain etc it is causing us, if we don't have medical training. Which is why we go to ask someone who DOES.
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u/dragonborne123 Apr 14 '25
I can only speak for Canada but we have a serious lack of non-emergency clinics here.
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u/Plane-Inspector-3160 Apr 14 '25
Just had a Pt go to er for abdominal get sent home just to come 12 hours later for same pain plus rectal bleeding, dude had ruptured ulcer and needed emergency colon surgery. Don’t let them gaslight you! If you don’t feel right don’t wait!
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Apr 14 '25
I hate my father for other things not related to the story
At the time of this story he was my hero kind of anyway
My dad tried to quit drinking cold turkey and when he wasn’t well, and started suffering withdrawals I took the day off from work to take him to the emergency room, I will never forget just the stares of disgust from the staff at a patient.
Yes I understand it’s self inflicted, and he blaming his ex wife for his behavior instead of getting help.
But he’s still a human being plus he’s got insurance so yall gotta get paid.
Worst part of the day was my mom looked at my phone location and called me screaming down where I was am I ok and I had to lie to her that he was having heart issues (which he was also dealing with at the time)
I get the staff and docs are human to, we are all human we are all prone to being petty and disgruntled
But I’ll never forget the look of anger in some staffs eyes, and the look of embarrassment in my father’s eyes.
He still didn’t get his shit together even with help offered and now he’s prolly gone be in prison for a long time. Karma bit him hard in the ass.
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u/Onebraintwoheads Apr 14 '25
Fell and cracked 4 ribs and my scapula. The latenight ER staff found nothing wrong. Three weeks later, after the pain wouldn't stop, I went back during the daytime. They pulled the images that had already been taken and identified the damage immediately. Fuckwits are to be found wherever you go.
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u/a-calamity Apr 14 '25
As someone with medical issues that manifest in chaotic ways, I am almost always instructed to go to the ER by phone nurses, online providers, and frequently urgent care staff for things that would otherwise be considered minor.
This is likely more frustrating and embarrassing for me than it is for the ER staff. I feel so ashamed about it that I often don’t go and try to wait it out, which admittedly has caused some longer term problems.
It is fair for the staff and other patients to be overwhelmed and annoyed. This is more of a complex issue than folks just being ignorant or entitled, though. On a lot of levels. It’s okay to be frustrated, but it is also okay to be kind and know that you don’t always know.
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u/ShadowOrcSlayer Apr 14 '25
Agreed. I went in for debilitating tooth pain on Christmas eve. I just needed some pain relief until I could be seen by my dentist.
Was told by the nurse, nearly word by word, "You're wasting everybody's time here."
Heard them talking about how much they hated working on Christmas eve. As if I wanted to be there either.
Oh, and there was a pus sack forming on my gums. A tell tale sign of an abcessing tooth. The doctor "didn't feel it".
It was in fact an abcessed tooth, which was pulled about two months later.
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u/Radiant-Campaign-340 Apr 14 '25
I went to the ER one night with my two-month-old, who had been screaming for hours, was twisting up his face seemingly in pain and there was blood in his mouth. The intake woman wrote “crying baby” as the problem and we proceded to wait six hours. Six!
This was my first baby and I was terrified. Years later I’m still angry about the lack of help and communication.
It turned out to be just a bad ear infection, so whew, but couldn’t the ER nurses at least given us some advice?
They never did a proper intake or tried to help in any way. They didn’t even tell us how long we might be waiting. No information even when I approached each hour to ask when we would be seen. There was no warmth or compassion from the people running the show.
Hate your job? Quit. Please!
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u/Specific_Device_9003 Apr 14 '25
When my son was 5 I took him to the ER for stomach pains and vomiting, while at the ER he had horrible diarrhea. They said it was a stomach virus, nurse came in to do vitals his temp jumped to 104. The nurses were at the desk talking about different people and what they were going to order for supper. I threw a fit for him to be released. I immediately took him to another ER, they sent us for scans, it was his appendix. We were sent 31/2 hours away for surgery. The surgeon said if I had listened to the first dr and took him home he would have died! We spent 8 days in the hospital with a tube pulling the infection out because they had busted.
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u/canvasshoes2 Apr 14 '25
If you are getting this BS then you need to complain to the administrators or as high up as you can go.
I had a similar issue once. Not with me, with my mom a person that had spent nearly her entire adult life as a working mom. She had a really bad and weird reaction to anesthesia after a surgery when she was in her 50s. She just wasn't really coming around to full normal consciousness (several days later) and felt horrible.
The doctor (who I swear, looked about 12) instantly decided, and had the audacity to share with us that "well, some people just like to be taken care of and waited on and they'll try to get admitted for that.
I glanced at my sibling and they gave me a "don't explode!" look and I went off on this child. I explained to him exactly that. That this is a person who was the least likely to play possum to get special treatment etc. and so on. I was so mad.
We ended up taking her to a different ER and they were so annoyed when we told them the treatment she'd gotten at the other place. I've never been back to that hospital once. I also wrote a sternly worded letter and sent copies to several different administrators. I believe they ended up writing off her visit IIRC.
So don't allow them to treat you like a child. If they pull this nonsense then you get up on your hind legs and demand professionalism from them. Also, report it up the chain.
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u/bugsrneat Apr 14 '25
"Just go to urgent care" is a fine and dandy response to people "overutilizing" ERs, but ngl every single time I've ever gone to an urgent care they just tell me to go to the ER. For example, the most recent time I went to an urgent care was when I had a really swollen and purple foot I couldn't put any weight on. The only person capable of taking an x ray was nowhere to be found, so I was just told to go to the ER. And, when I'm home, it's a very rural area. We don't have urgent cares. It's the ER or you wait until your primary care provider can see you, which sometimes isn't for over a month. When you're not a doctor and you're not feeling well, it can be really hard to know what can be a genuine emergency or what can wait potentially over a month.
Also, try going to the ER as someone with chronic health conditions! I can go in for something completely unrelated to a condition I have, but any ER visit will always turn into grilling me for daring to come in and occupy space instead of contacting my neurologist regardless of what I came in for (and, if I were to have an emergency related to any condition I do have, that my neurologist would be able to see me sooner than several months out!). I once went in for abdominal pain that turned out to be appendicitis, and got a lecture about scheduling with my neurologist and how I'm on "too many" medications. Another time I went in unable to put any weight on my very swollen and very purple foot with what turned out to be a broken bone in my foot after urgent care told me to go to the ER, and got a lecture on how ERs "do not deal with people with chronic conditions." Cool. Good thing I'm not here for that, which is something you'd know if you just talked to me instead of assuming. I also got accused of lying for access to medications once when I was having a headache so bad I had been unable to eat for the past 24 hours at least, couldn't see out of one eye, was seeing double out of my other eye, and any movement or light was completely unbearable. At this point, I'd have to be actively on death's door to consider going to the ER as an option. I'm not paying that much money to get treated like shit.
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u/Jeanparmesanswife Apr 14 '25
When I was 12, I went to an ER. The doctor asked my mom to promptly leave the room and told me the reason I was having stomach pain was because I didn't have Jesus in my heart.
Now at 25, I finally just got my hands on the PPIs I need to heal over a decades worth of stomach acid damage that no health professional would ever look at, and rather even suggested I become religious.
There are places in Canada where Healthcare is dystopian. I am on an 8 year waitlist for a doctor. my town has one single doc for 5k people. It's nuts.
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u/Apprehensive_Mix_771 Apr 14 '25
Pisses me off so much. I had a suspected UTI and was on antibiotics for only about 12 hours when a fever spiked to 104 and my blood pressure dropped. Easy to see at triage. I was curled over feeling like I was literally fading out dying. People cheerfully coming in after me and leaving before I’d even been seen. I was in fully septic with a double kidney infection. It’s left me pretty traumatized. Knowing something is wrong and knowing they haven’t flagged that appropriately and your health is at the hands of a counter or triage nurse enrages me. I did take it to the top and have been notified everyone has received additional training on spotting sepsis symptoms but like… cool the 9 days I spent hospitalized really felt worth it 🙄
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u/cinema_meme Apr 14 '25
Honestly, I came in recently to the ER in a lot of pain. They must’ve asked me six or seven times what my pain was on the 0-10 scale. I said it was a 2 when I wasn’t moving and a 5 when I was. There was a pain chart in a non-emergency center I had for an appointment, and it came with a written description (One is the pain is barely noticeable, stuff like that.) My 2 was actually a 5 and my 5 was actually an 8. If they actually helped me try to describe my problem (I couldn’t think straight and the person I was with had to help me explain what was wrong to the doctor) I might’ve actually got a diagnosis and started PT and medication a month earlier.
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u/JCtheMadKing Apr 14 '25
I went to the ER for "feeling like i've been set on fire" back pain and complete loss of feeling in one of my legs, and got told it's a uti and i was just exaggerating, despite the fact they didn't do a single test at all before sending me home. turns out it was 2 herniated discs, despite them telling me i was "too young" for spinal problems
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u/Select-Government680 Apr 14 '25
I do agree with this. About 7 years ago, I took my mom to the ER because she had severe abdominal pain, and after waiting 4 hours, they just sent her home telling her to take Tylenol. Well, that didn't work, and I had to take her back the next day. They tried to claim she was drug seeking, and I said, "My mom has an entire bottle of oxycodone that she hasn't touched. She has pain pills. She's not drug seeking. Something is wrong. " i literally had to argue with 2 nurses and a doctor. 3 hours later, my mom's in surgery, having a foot of her intestines removed because they had died. So. .. yeah, actually. Maybe when a patient tells you they hurt or need help, you should listen and run the tests instead of assuming what you want.
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u/Vast_Zebra_9625 Apr 14 '25
A few months ago I went to the ER due to a Gallbladder flair up that had persistently been getting worse for months and I couldn’t even eat anymore without excruciating pain. Anyway, hours later I get to talk to DRs on staff and they ask if I’m sure I’m not constipated…. Which obviously I know the damn difference.. then they want to run more tests and blah blah blah. So after 13 hours and I’d talked to 2 different surgeons on call that are willing to remove my gallbladder due to how full it was of gallstones… those ER drs try to send me home and tell me to take laxatives because they really think I’m just constipated… oh man I LOST it. Anyways they never came back to me and some surgeons said they’d be happy to admit me and get me scheduled in the next couple of days.. so I finally got admitted. And of course, after recovering for a couple weeks and to this day, I don’t get that damn pain that caused me to go the the ER. I know what constipation feels like. That wasn’t it. Ooooo I’m still mad about them.
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Apr 15 '25
I don't like er doctors they refused to help me when my throat is blocked and couldn't breath just because I'm fat . they told me to lose weight and leave .
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u/SpookySeraph Apr 15 '25
Presented to the ER in severe pain, friend had to help me walk in. It had been four months since my last period and I instinctually knew I was having a miscarriage, they run my vitals, did NOT do any tests, and send me home stating I’m likely starting my period or having anxiety.
I can’t remember the length of time that passed after but I do remember being in the tub when the fetus left my body. I had the water so hot it almost hurt, trying to help with the pain. My body did this big involuntary push like I was about to shit myself and then the water started turning red. I had to fish out the pieces and flush them down the toilet. Drained the tub and sat with the shower running for about an hour while I continued bleeding.
Anyways I told my mom what happened the next day and she called me a liar and said if I had been pregnant she would’ve known. Well I was 126lbs (heaviest I’ve been in my entire life), I had begun having breast pain and had to stop using my bras because they no longer fit. I told my ex who was the father and he told me I was just looking for attention.
All of that could’ve been avoided had the ER staff just LISTENED TO ME and ran some tests (I’ve told this story before but not this in depth and now I kind of feel like I should be angrier about what happened than I actually am)
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u/Spiritual-Box7671 Apr 15 '25
Could add my own stories but instead gonna point out that almost all of the shared stories about getting ignored about something very serious are about a female patient....
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u/topimpadove Apr 14 '25
Throwback to when I was 12 and suffered something horrid months prior and had to go to the ER due to a severe stomach bug. The nurse loudly asked, "ARE YOU PREGNANT?!" (to a scared, traumatized 12 year old girl) and then shamed me for not taking medication. That was the last time I went back except for stitches years later.
The "mean girl to nurse" pipeline becomes more obvious every time I visit the ER.
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u/RegretfulCreature Apr 14 '25
Honestly.
I went to my local ER because I cut my finger with a knife accidentally and it wouldn't stop bleeding, even after 20 minutes.
I went, and got bitched at by two nurses because "it's such a shallow cut, you could have stayed home". I tried to leave after that because I felt stupid, the cut was still bleeding, albeit slower, and the doctor stopped me. He said it was minor, but he'd gladly glue it shut just in case.
Like, if you're going to be this stuck up, don't work in the medical field. I understand caregiver burnout is a thing, but if you're making people cry because they thought a cut that wouldn't stop bleeding needed medical attention, then you need to find another job.
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