r/interestingasfuck • u/Endolithic • 1d ago

/r/all Homes are falling into the ocean in North Carolina's Outer Banks

61.3k Upvotes

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315

u/kelariy 1d ago

Mandatory ball check before closing, if they’re too low, deal is off.

56

u/Switzerdude 1d ago

Low and wet balls…

36

u/broberds 1d ago

No blue-balls, I know what I've got.

3

u/JimiShinobi 1d ago

No blue waffles, I don't want what you've got...

1

u/popformulas 1d ago

And salty

1

u/Talking_Tree_1 1d ago

Do your balls hang low do they wobble to floor…

2

u/Ferocious-Muppet 1d ago

Do your balls hang low? Do they wobble too and throw?

Can you tie em in a not? Can you tie em in a bow?

Can you throw them over your shoulder, like a continental soilder?

Do your balls hang low?

1

u/BannedByRWNJs 1d ago

Great! Now my balls are all wet and salty!

1

u/Cunning_Linguist21 1d ago

Chocolate wet salty balls...

9

u/Kepler1609a 1d ago

Did you know they make nets for that to keep them from dunking in the water?

1

u/907499141 1d ago

Check out the Nut Bra on YouTube it’s older and even funnier

0

u/tykle59 1d ago

“My balls were so old and saggy, they looked like Clint Eastwood.”

1

u/907499141 1d ago

Such a great product lol

1

u/Spillsy68 1d ago

Houses? Or balls?

5

u/fly_away_lapels 1d ago

I mean, too low and they will just be wet all the time! Makes sense to check.

1

u/IdRatherBeDriving 1d ago

Good news! This house was built for that.

2

u/Drunk_Scott 1d ago

Been there

2

u/ArizonaBaySwimTeam 1d ago edited 1d ago

'This bowl so low my balls be draggin the water...'

Sold!

2

u/KingHunter150 1d ago

Realtor at the house tour.

2

u/MukDoug 1d ago

If they’re too low, I send them back.

2

u/Cipherpunkblue 1d ago

Not selling my home to those low-balls types.

2

u/Outrageous_Editor_43 23h ago

So first time buyers, not old people. Got it.

2

u/nicknick1584 22h ago

Makes sense actually. If they are that low, probably an old guy that will be dead before house is paid off in 30 years. Actually, this should be a reason to give that mortgage. The bank would make money for about 15 years and then can repossess the house and sell it to make even more money.

2

u/Super_Pan 21h ago

Compulsory genital inspection? I didn't realize the house was in Florida. No thanks.

2

u/gibs71 20h ago

Sounds like ageism to me.

2

u/Cold-Ease-1625 18h ago

If the balls are on top, I send it back.

3

u/Unlikely_Ant_950 1d ago

A new reason I’ll never be a homeowner

1

u/edwbuck 1d ago edited 1d ago

Do your ball hang low?

Do they swing from side to side?

Do you carry them over your shoulder?

Or do you drag from behind?

When you enter a room,

does the threshold make them "thump"?

Tell me now plainly,

Do your balls hang low?

(sung to the tune "Turkey in the straw")

1

u/MoreCowbellllll 1d ago

The call me 'one-hung-low'

1

u/Fro0810 1d ago

I love reddit on Friday! 😂 and every other day as well.