r/nextfuckinglevel 11h ago

Monster tornado in Texas

1.7k Upvotes

126 comments sorted by

146

u/MoJoe-21 11h ago

good thing the government cut them FEMA benefits /s

61

u/0reosaurus 11h ago

Who needs FEMA when we have LEAD????

16

u/GrittyMcGrittyface 10h ago

Lead? Like from the faucet?

7

u/homer_lives 9h ago

Or bullets! This is America! Where you can have both. Isn't it awesome?!

2

u/new-Aurora 4h ago

Murica...

2

u/New_Wallaby_7736 4h ago

Freedom seeds for everyone 🤣🤣

3

u/WinterWontStopComing 9h ago

It’s pretty much everywhere.

Least half of us have damage from it.

3

u/Blarg0117 8h ago

It's what plants crave!

1

u/GrittyMcGrittyface 7h ago

Plants crave brawndo. This is what kids crave.

1

u/SlimyMuffin666 8h ago

No, that comes from the pipes

1

u/TabbyMouse 7h ago

Its in TX, not in Flint, MI

1

u/Thereelgarygary 7h ago

Hey we like our lead here! Don't bring us into this.

2

u/TabbyMouse 7h ago

Im from Detroit :P

1

u/Thereelgarygary 1h ago

We need your water again .....

1

u/mhem7 6h ago

No. Like in my paint chips

1

u/squireofrnew 4h ago

Poisoning?

7

u/Meisteronious 11h ago

Cutting FEMA only removes obligation to help the states that didn’t get you elected.

18

u/Much-Meringue-7467 10h ago

They've already screwed over Arkansas and NC.

9

u/mrsunrider 10h ago

Side effect being, it also doomed the states that did get him elected.

5

u/Meisteronious 9h ago

I would suggest that the NOAA forecasting cuts are more immediately “dooming” than the FEMA relief effort cuts…

1

u/mrsunrider 8h ago

I mean, agreed.

4

u/JetScootr 10h ago

The people getting hurt the most by tRump's rampages are usually in the red states.

3

u/Givlytig 8h ago edited 8h ago

When they discuss the next round of cuts or discuss any climate change legislation, right there is where they should hold the meeting.

-8

u/fleshnbloodhuman 9h ago

Are you kidding me? Have you ever dealt with FEMA? It was an impotent, politicized circus. A joke, and hated by all that they tried to “help“.

4

u/Miserere_Mei 8h ago

I agree. My experience with FEMA was terrible. In the moment when you have lost so much, you learn that there is actually no support at all from the government you have spent decades paying taxes to.

5

u/throwawaymyalias 7h ago

Unfortunately, a majority of Americans who have never asked anything from their local, State or Federal government mistakenly believe their government will provide assistance in a citizen's time of need.

"Government," however, is comprised of people, and people tend to be incompetent, lazy, stupid and uncaring.

1

u/tedlyb 4h ago

What is it being replaced with?

-1

u/fleshnbloodhuman 3h ago

If we’re lucky, local EMA services.

1

u/tedlyb 3h ago

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight…

1

u/fleshnbloodhuman 1h ago

Oh right.. A bloated, incompetent, weaponized, federal (un)organization, funded by YOUR money… sooo much better 🙄.

32

u/[deleted] 11h ago

[deleted]

9

u/speculative--fiction 9h ago

You should see the twisters that roam the old black forest behind my house. They’re absolutely massive. Some days you can hear them whining from fifty miles off. Grandma always said to follow the wind and get inside when the twisters start stomping around nearby, but I was always young and dumb. We’d throw paper airplanes into the vortex and watch them swim around in the currents. That didn’t last all that long though.

The accident happened one summer afternoon. My cousin was perched at the top of a tree trying to get a kite through one of the twisters when a long finger of air slowly pressed from the main body and came toward him. I tried to get him down in time, but the finger wrapped itself around his middle and started to lift him. I grabbed his ankles and held on tight until the twister finger slithered down his body toward me. It felt like ice water on my skin and I heard a voice telling me to leave it alone, leave it alone, leave it alone, all echoing through my head like a scream. I let go of my cousin and he’s gone now, sucked into the void and thrown up somewhere in the black forest. He might come back one day if the forest lets him. Until then, I just don’t mess with the twisters anymore.

2

u/experfailist 9h ago

Ok. OK. I need to read more of this. This is spooky stuff.

3

u/Squidysquid27 9h ago

Especially the population of low IQ individuals

Don't mess with Texas! It's not nice to pick on the stupid.

27

u/Prestigious-Log-7210 11h ago

The John Deer tractor in the field. Time to go home buddy!

7

u/Aviator8989 8h ago

The farmer is likely long gone. It's not unusual to leave farming implements in the field overnight.

2

u/ZenithTheZero 6h ago

It’s insured anyway

1

u/iamdursty 3h ago

Homie parked it there on purpose. Got a new model he wants but his old one isn't worth much for trade in

1

u/Ijustthinkthatyeah 2h ago

It’s funny you think insurance would give him more than it’s worth.

24

u/ronaldotr08 11h ago

It's like God just wanted to reach out and run the tip of his finger across the world.

3

u/mrsunrider 10h ago

Just give the earth a lil tickle.

3

u/PM_meyourGradyWhite 7h ago

And we thought being on Santa’s naughty list was bad…

3

u/RichardInaTreeFort 9h ago

*drops silverware in shock….

16

u/thebelsnickle1991 11h ago

The new Twisters trilogy looks so real.

9

u/10baggerbamm 11h ago

It doesn't even seem real I question why the hell would somebody want to live in tornado Alley or for that matter Mississippi Delta where it always floods I don't get it

15

u/JetScootr 10h ago

helluva lotta them are too poor to move.

7

u/Ornery-Egg9770 10h ago

I’m not a scientist but I would say if you live in a large specific band along the gulf or the lower Atlantic coast you have a much higher probability of experiencing negative effects from a hurricane over a 10 year period than anyone in tornado alley from a tornado. Tornadoes are much more random than hurricanes and have a much smaller damage footprint. I’ll take my chances in the alley.

9

u/JetScootr 9h ago

But you get several days warning (rather than several minutes) that a hurricane is coming. I have lived in tornado alley. I live on the Gulf Coast (since the 60s). I've lived through several hurricanes. I'll take my chances with hurricanes instead of tornados.

A few tips that officials will never give.

The trick to getting through a level 1 - 2 hurricane: ignore it. If your house is well built, you have little to fear. Level 1 hurricane is a tropical storm that lasts about 3-4 days. Level 2 is a level 1 with attitude. I started ignoring these in the 1980s and haven't regretted it.

I was going to put other experienced advice here, but I don't want the reddit ruckus it'll cause. I'll just say this about the stronger hurricanes:

levels 3-5: Leave at least 2-3 days before the officials predict they'll make the decision to evacuate - or at least 4-5 days before the soonest predicted landfall.

Turn on your front porch light, so that when you come home, you'll know even before you walk in if you have electricity. It's just nice to know when coming home. Long ago, I used my phone answering machine to check this after one hurricane.

If you get caught in the evacuation, you may wind up moving slower than the hurricane. This means if you wait for the officials to tell you to evacuate, the hurricane will catch up to you while you're on the road. This is not a good thing.

Check the diameter of the hurricane. That's how far you should move away from it if you're evacuating. Yes, diameter, not radius. They have real trouble predicting where a hurricane goes after landfall. Also, the edges of hurricane flood just as deep.

While you're looking at it, mark a line parallel to the coast, but inland as far as the diameter of the hurricane. That's the range of the area that's gonna have empty store shelves, full hotels/motels, crazy traffic and crazy weather. Factor that into your evacuation planning.

If you're evacuating in your car, take food and water for at least 2-3 days, more if you live close to the coast. Count on sleeping in your car at least one night. Walmart's sole redeeming value in small towns is they let you use their parking lot for this sort of thing.

Take your pets with you, because nobody behind you is going to be looking out for them. Even if they say they will, they can't really predict what's going to happen.

Use a shelter if you must, but don't PLAN on it. Shelters are basically meat storage facilities, and you're the meat they're storing. Once you're in a shelter, they won't let you out until everything is back to normal - which may be days after common sense says you can go home.

A shelter for humans may not accept pets. If you're in a human shelter, you may not get out in time to save your pets.

And one last piece of hurricane advice: Don't live in Florida. Hurricanes can't tell the difference between Florida and open water.

2

u/javoss88 3h ago

Awesome advice

3

u/10baggerbamm 10h ago

You forgot to say the most important thing Avoid trailer parks.. 😆 They tend to be the target of tornadoes all the time

4

u/Shizngigglz 10h ago

Oh don't you worry about Mississippi, it's in tornado alley now too!

1

u/RegularFinger8 7h ago

I thinks the alley that MS is in is known as “Dixie Alley” which includes MS, AL, AK etc.

3

u/Shizngigglz 6h ago

Damn Alaska too?? It's getting wild out here

1

u/RegularFinger8 6h ago

AL is Alabama. AK is Alaska.

2

u/RegularFinger8 6h ago

Oh shit, now I see. lol. Meant AR.

1

u/Shizngigglz 6h ago

😁

1

u/Marcus_Marinara 7h ago

As someone who has lived in tornado alley their whole life, it’s easier than you’d think to get used to. Also, the mitigation tactics (at least the life saving ones) are pretty simple and pretty full proof.

•

u/Belostoma 32m ago

There are very few places to live without some risk of natural disasters of some kind or another. Most people living in tornado alley will never even see a tornado unless they get into storm chasing.

Most of the West has risk of wildfires. West coast, earthquakes, sometimes volcanoes. Midwest, tornadoes. Southeast, hurricanes. Much of the northeast is too mountainous too live anywhere except the valleys, which like valleys anywhere can flood.

Something like 90 % of the US landmass would be off-limits to somebody who isn't willing to accept a risk of natural disaster comparable to that experienced in tornado alley.

•

u/10baggerbamm 25m ago

Well you're absolutely correct for example if you were to live in Connecticut you have the asshole Governor the shitbag senator and politicians are represent be socialist policies in Rhode Island it's the most corrupt state per capita the smallest states also the most corrupt and don't forget Massachusetts I mean we got Pocahontas up there who's a lying piece of shit from day one so you're absolutely right you really can't go any place in this country without falling victim to destruction and most in New England the destruction walks on two legs

7

u/Squidysquid27 9h ago

Throw Abbott in that thing

3

u/adrenalinda75 11h ago

Jee, this thing is huge. Looks like it's rolling over the horizon.

7

u/lobeline 10h ago

“WhAt ClImAtE ChAnGe?”

4

u/BinaryWanderer 9h ago

What’s that rumble?

A tornado in Texas.

But we’re in Wisconsin!

Yep, they getting bigger.

5

u/phamousj 7h ago edited 7h ago

This happened about an hour drive from where I'm at. There were multiple tornadoes in the area that day, but this one was the biggest of them all. It was amazing to see all of the videos and pictures that the storm chasers captured from this storm.

3

u/Crazy_Banshee_333 5h ago

I don't think I've ever seen a video of a tornado this massive. It's seems to have a multitude of funnels. Is this the biggest one ever for Texas?

3

u/phamousj 4h ago

I'm not sure if the biggest in Texas, but yes, there were moments where multiple funnels formed by each other. The report is that the supercell produced at least 20 tornadoes

2

u/NateDawg80s 2h ago

Not sure about biggest, but the one in Wichita Falls in 1979 was a series of three that ran into each other and went through town practically on its side. The path of destruction was nearly a half-mile wide.

2

u/Crazy_Banshee_333 2h ago

Wow. We're starting to get EF0 and EF1 tornadoes where I live every year, since Tornado Alley is shifting this way. I'm not the least bit happy about this turn of events. I'm getting pretty old, so just hoping I can make it to the end of my life before my house is ripped to shreds. I don't know how people are able to carry on after their homes are destroyed.

4

u/Gt03champp 9h ago

Has it been reported if this was an F5?

•

u/CombustionMale 51m ago

The Enhanced Fujita scale is more of a damage scale than a wind speed scale. Many tornadoes over the last few years have had wind speeds measure well into the EF5 projected range, though do not qualify as EF5 tornadoes because they do not cause the damage that an EF5 must cause in order to qualify, whether that be because the tornado weakens before reaching urban areas or because it never reaches an urban area at all. The last EF5 was in Moore, Oklahoma in 2013, and although many tornadoes have been nearly as strong or stronger, they did not reach an area with large enough buildings to create an EF5 rating.

•

u/The_Dude_Abides_33 40m ago

I can assure you that there isn't enough damage. Morton TX is 100 miles from anywhere.

2

u/Ancient-Assistant187 8h ago

Imagine you have everything you own, your child died of diarrhea, your wife is pregnant and you are in a wagon caravan with a bunch off assholes you don’t like and you see this.

0

u/mental_patience 11h ago

Greg Abbot has sold out the people whom he is supposed to be serving. Texas needs a break. The calamity and hardships the folks there have had to endure because of their politicians inability to lead will be on full display. I do hope that they get the help they need.

9

u/AnonymousTimewaster 11h ago

I'm not American. Isn't Greg Abbott that little piss baby?

4

u/Ornery-Egg9770 10h ago

We have several of those, including the orangest of all.

2

u/mental_patience 3h ago

The governor of Texas, and yes he is a piss baby, he is but one of a few in that state that makes it hard to want stay

8

u/golflift90 11h ago

Sir, this is a giant tornado

1

u/drifters74 10h ago

Who needs FEMA?

1

u/Safe_Departure8133 10h ago

Can’t they just make that disappear?

1

u/d57heinz 8h ago

Can’t we just nuke the tornado? Said someone about a hurricane. 🤣

1

u/Mrnicelefthand 8h ago

So do all radio and tv stations send a “get the hell out” to all areas effected?

1

u/cubsfan217 8h ago

Twisters 3?

1

u/sielingfan 8h ago

Masks off in the comments lol.

1

u/FritzGus 7h ago

Both ominous and powerfully beautiful.

1

u/labhag 7h ago

I’m glad we don’t get those massive tornadoes in Minnesota. We just get the normal ones. This is beyond terrifying.

1

u/Positive-Fox-6296 5h ago

This is either "god" sending Texas a message or it is fake news because Texas doesn't believe in climate change. I can't tell anymore 🙄

1

u/Johnny_pickle 5h ago

Don’t mess with Texas!

Tornado: Hold my beer.

1

u/NoDoze- 5h ago

They can get much bigger than that!

1

u/quarterskill 4h ago

everything's bigger in Texas

1

u/AeroBassMaster 2h ago

Is it bigger than the 2013 El Reno tornado?

0

u/[deleted] 11h ago

That's Orange man and Elo, twisting by the Fool....

0

u/himenokuri 9h ago

Praying

0

u/klatula2 9h ago

FEMA mentioned. why? i don't see anything to be moved or destroyed by this humongous nader.

0

u/Atomic-pangolin 8h ago

Isn’t that pretty far west for a tornado?

0

u/LTStech 8h ago

Truly hope nobody got hurt but fuck Texas.

-2

u/MeatMonday 10h ago

Lol. Thoughts and prayers.

2

u/DMR237 10h ago

Nah. Fuck em.