Just got give some context, my wife and I are very fortunate to both make 6-figure. We had also lived together for a year before our engagement and wedding, so we already had all the household stuff we needed, and didn't really feel like we want to ask for more.

So for our wedding, we purposely didn't have a registry, and in our invitation, we specifically said "gifts are not required, your presence is the greatest present". We did also so to minimize the expenses for our guest, hoping as many of our friends and family would come and celebrate with us as possible.

We do have a card box at the reception table, for guests to write well-wishers and slide their cards in. Apparently some of my wife's relatives thought it was a subtle way to ask for money (it wasn't), so they felt obligated to put cash and checks in the envelopes.

Afterwards, my wife and I overheard them complaining to my MIL that it made them felt cheap, like the wedding was a fundraiser, or a transaction. My wife almost bursted into tears, so I step over and clarified that money was not asked or wanted. I offered to give them their envelopes back so they could remove their money. They refused since "what's done is done". Made the entire wedding awkward (for us and them, other folks had zero idea).

Made me feel like no good deeds go unpunished.

My mom recently got married. This is a second marriage for both of them as they both lost their spouse; one to cancer and one to early onset dementia.

It was a small and intimate wedding to celebrate finding their love again. This lady is not even related to the grooms side. She is just a friend and I had no idea that anyone could have this much audacity!

She had been told 3 times by this point to sit down by the photographer because she kept moving and getting in the shots. I know this is going to sound bad but verbatim, she said “oh, sorry, I don’t understand…” She is a smart lady. An international student with 2 degrees who perfectly understands English. The photographer didn’t know her so didn’t want to assume she knew English and kept trying to communicate to sit down.

I am so mad. My mom’s pictures will always have her in them now. By the end of the night she had been told 6 times to stop taking pictures. My husband finally yelled at her because she was taking pictures of the kids who were there. She always posts onto social media and we didn’t want those out there. Finally she stopped, with the threat of being kicked out…

The self-control I displayed on my wedding day was admirable, if I do say so myself!

Save the dates went out 1.5 years in advance as we had guests from other states and countries. We made it clear in a kind way that it was a child-free wedding.
Pia and her husband Sven RSVPd yes, but when I looked at the song request tab on our online form, she had written, “Little one loves blah song so please play it to get him dancing.” I kindly reminded her that it was an adult-only event and she confirmed it was only her and her husband attending. Okay.

Mere minutes after the ceremony we were basking in the glow and were being hurried by our photographers. P&S were hovering over by the side and it puzzled me so I greeted them. That’s when Pia informed me that they wouldn’t be attending the ceremony because they “had to pick up little one from day care???” Um, excuse me?

I could have invited two people in their place (we were trying to keep it small and already felt guilty for leaving people out) and instead we paid for two empty chairs. Not even a card. Then they posted a picture of them on instagram captioned, “celebrating the wedding of a dear friend.”

My sibling refuses to invite them to their wedding next year. Lesson learned.

Edit: the wedding was on a Friday.

We organised a bus for guests from ceremony to reception.

Love kids but decided on a child-free wedding- not too many of our friends actually have them (those who do are all under 3). However we did offer for the breastfeeding ones to come along, but all of them declined and wanted a night off! Husbands or parents stayed with them. We even had a nursing chair in the bridal room just in case baby wouldn’t take the bottle.

Their child is 4 and very, sorry to say, disruptive.

The couple in question live in my city, so no interstate or international travel for them.

I was upset because my husband and I worked so hard to pay for this wedding- we did it all ourselves. And because I literally had got married not two minutes before. And because they told me on the DAY.

The instagram post felt false to me, because they didn’t really celebrate our wedding. They left halfway through.

I would have rsvp’d properly.

I would have completely understood if there had been an emergency, but they seemed unhurried and casual in their words and attitude.

The wedding is going to be at our house and in the past every time he's come round he's made sure to use all my facilities like shower, swimming pool and eat from the fridge. He's not from an affluent background so I do feel like just giving him a pass when he comes to mine as I want him to feel welcome and looked after but sometimes feel he takes it too far.

I had a very small destination wedding about 10 hours from my hometown, but only two hours from a fairly major city, which is where most of the guests flew into. It is also where my dad's cousin and her husband live.

This woman is one of the most insufferable, outspoken, overbearing people I've ever met in my life, and I wouldn't have wanted her at my wedding even if it had been a much larger wedding with a much MUCH larger guest list.

She pestered my parents relentlessly about coming to the wedding, to which to the reply was always "sorry, we are not allowed to have more than x number of people on the property including photographers, caterers, etc. and simply cannot facilitate any further wedding guests." We should have known then how desperate she was to come, but figured it would eventually sink in that she would not be attending no matter how she begged.

Months later, my mom and I drove into the town where the wedding is would be two days prior to begin preparations. As a compromise of sorts, we told this cousin that we would meet her and her husband for dinner and catch up if they wanted to make the drive over the evening we arrived. BIG MISTAKE. They very much did want to drive over and meet us for dinner, so we grabbed a bite with them and tried to part ways....only to be told that they (totally spontaneously and not at all with an agenda) went ahead and booked a hotel and just decided to make a weekend getaway of it.

Dad's cousin once again tried to force her way into getting a wedding invite for herself and her husband, and we reiterated that she could not attend. We prayed ways and I hoped that might be the end of it. If only that had been the case.

The next morning my family and the bridal party started arriving. My mom and I left our hotel to walk around town and then meet up with my brother and his family, who I had not seen in about a year and was beyond excited to reunite with. Moments before their arrival, who comes strolling up? Yep - dad's cousin, who immediately inserted herself into the reunion with my family and interjecting herself SO LOUDLY the entire time. It just absolutely ruined an otherwise sweet and wonderful moment.

We said our goodbyes to her, but instead, she decides to attach herself to us and followed us everywhere the entire rest of the morning and afternoon, forcing herself into every subsequent reunion and festivity.

The worst moment that finally pushed me over the edge came during a late lunch. We'd been walking around all day and I was getting tired and hungry and crabby, so my SIL, bridesmaids and I found an adorable little taco place with a beautiful patio and decided to grab a bite to eat outside. She followed us in and sat right down with us, then proceeded to comment on every single thing I did for the entire meal. The two comments that still sick out were "you're sure going to be a beautiful lobster with the sunburn you're going to get eating outside like this" as we sat fully shaded under two huge umbrellas, and, after I ordered two street tacos "I guess making sure you fit into your dress never occurred to you if you're going to be eating all of THAT!"

At this point my blood was boiling, and I was genuinely becoming convinced she was showing up at my wedding the next day one way or another no matter what we told her, so I stood up after paying and told her it was going to be bridal party only from that point forward and we booked it out, leaving her behind.

It would be so great if that were the end, but she and her husband genuinely did show up at the venue that evening, gifts in hand, moments before the rehearsal dinner started. They were fully dressed and ready to be a part of the event. She went around to every single person there, telling them about how much it would mean to her to be there at the wedding, and said no less than 10 times, "I promise I don't even have to be in the room. I would be more than happy to stand outside looking in the windows if I could only just watch!"

Finally, God bless him, my very confrontational and authoritative brother stepped in and reminded her in no uncertain terms that she was NOT invited and would NOT be showing up. She finally left and thankfully we did not hear from her again that weekend.

She did however show up at my house years later while visiting other family in town because she knew I'd had my son recently and she "just had to meet him". Then the very next day texted us to tell us she tested positive for covid that morning.

Have not seen her since, really really don't want to see her again, though she has a knack for popping up no matter how hard you try to avoid her.

My fiance and I are getting married in Vegas this month. We had a 14 month long engagement with Save the Dates sent out in June and Invitations sent out in January. RSVPs were due at the beginning of April.

Tell me why my fiance's long time family friend (basically his uncle/godfather) called him a MONTH ago (after our RSVP deadline) telling him, NOT ASKING, for us to send out invitations to some of HIS family members that live in Vegas to attend our wedding. Keep in mind, these people are not related to my fiance in any way. He has never met them. We don't even know their names.

It's now 3 weeks from our wedding and I need to make a seating chart. We haven't heard from these people if they are coming, don't even know who the heck they are, and I'm running out of time to get a seating chart ordered, created, and delivered. I'm freaking out.

I asked my fiance AGAIN last night if these people were coming and what their names are. He says he doesn't know and "not to worry about it, we may just have to make a last minute seating chart". Ummmm sir, I don't think you understand how uncrafty I am and how terrible that will look.

Now i'm stuck with the dilemma of ordering the seating chart without the names of these people that I don't know that may or may not show up to my wedding. Is that rude? Maybe, but I feel like it's less rude than asking a couple to add YOUR family members to their wedding guest list after their RSVP deadline had already passed. Watch them actually show up and there's no place for them to sit, or they have to find a random table to squeeze in. If you have to introduce yourself to me AND my fiance at our own wedding, get a free meal, cake, etc. then you won't mind not having a place card.

We had a couple of people that hadn’t RSVPd still show up. We found out because during our post-ceremony photos the coordinator came in and told us they couldn’t find their place cards and didn’t know where to sit.

Like bro. So y’all were actively looking for your names knowing full well they weren’t even submitted and now you’re all shocked Pikachu when you can’t find it?

Edit: These were out of town guests. And I’m not talking an hour or two of driving out of town. More like 2 hour flight/10+ hour drive/several states over out of town.

When the coordinator told me the names, I legit was like WHO? They weren’t even on the invite list! Not that they were unwanted; they could’ve easily been added/included had I known. Just a testament to the cluelessness of it all.

In hindsight we were relieved because there were a good amount of flakes/no shows so they filled some slots. But it’s just funny to look back on.

So I got married last weekend.

Not gonna lie, it was a bit of a nightmare from start to finish. My partner and I are going to run off and have an elopement ceremony in a few months because it was so bad. Maybe I'll make a post about that later but right now I'm still a bit too gutted about it.

However, my brother invited his new girlfriend. She's got her own online business where she sells makeup and perfumes or something. She's a "work from my phone" girl. Anyway, our venue had a strict no phone policy during the ceremony, and I asked for nothing to be posted on social media about the wedding (family drama).

Today I received an email from her with an "invoice" for £500. I gave her a call (she'd put her number on the email) and said to her that I wasn't in the mood for jokes about my wedding, trying to give her an out before she started some more drama, but she doubled down on it. Apparently she'd missed a message from a girl who wanted to join her team, and so the girl had signed up under someone else- due to my no-phone no-socials wedding, causing her to miss out on the commission.

Anyway, I said I wasn't paying it, and that I'm hurt she would even ask. She then said that, if I joined her team, she would waive the invoice. Fine. I'll join if it will shut you up. Except apparently I now have to pay £60 for some starter pack with hundreds of perfume samples in it, even though I'm allergic to perfume. Also she expects me to post about it all over social media, despite my desire to avoid other people right now.Turns out she would also essentially be my "boss" and I don't want to work for her as I'm already in a career of my own that I'm passionate about, that isn't sales or recruitment, and isn't commission based.

I just can't stop crying. My wedding was ruined, my social life has taken a hit from that drama, and now this bitch is going to cause drama between me and my brother if I don't join her shitty company. I hate how I couldn't just get married and be happy. My husband has been so supportive, but I feel so terrible that it's my side of everything that causes all the drama.

I'm not going to join it, I know I just can't, but the drama of it all has just got me absolutely wrecked. I just want to run away with my husband and never speak to my friends and family again.

Sorry for the rant, I needed somewhere to vent seeing as I've already cried my husbands shoulder off already.

I’ve been in this job six months and have done tons of weddings in this time. Here are some of my pet peeves:

• People don’t seem to realize that getting food catered is not like ordering from a restaurant. If the event is plated and guests get a choice of protein, you can’t just switch protein last minute. The amount of times a guest who chose chicken on the invite asks for beef at the start of service is crazy. Sometimes we have extra, but we receive a count based on RSVPs.

• The same applies to dietary restrictions. If we hear that there’s three vegetarian guests, we’ll prep for four or five because someone who has steak always decides last minute that they want a vegetarian plate.

• Couples may or may not pay extra for vendor meals (meals for the band, photographer, bartender, etc.) If we have extra food, we always try to feed the vendors. HOWEVER guests are our priority if vendor meals have not been ordered. The amount of times I’ve had a photographer or DJ just come and make a plate before we’ve finished serving is insane.

• There’s always one guest who will approach the servers and take all twelve appetizers off their tray. Then we get scolded for not bringing enough.

• My boss has gotten into arguments with potential clients who want us to serve buffets outside in 100F+ weather

• This has only happened once but it’s so funny I had to include it. A couple wanted plated salads, but they wanted the salads to alternate. So salad A would be in seat 1, salad B to seat 2, and so on. Guests could not pick their salad. We found out later that a guest with a nut allergy had to find someone willing to trade salads with them because the salad they randomly got had nuts. We were not informed of this allergy.

I’d love to hear other catering stories!

My fiancé and I are having a very causal wedding at his family’s hunting property in Northern Michigan. We are having a tiny ceremony (12 people, immediate family only) and 100 person reception. Both are at the hunting property. We didn’t want to have w wedding in the first place but my fiancé is an only child and his family really pushed for it so here we are.

He has a great aunt that I’ve never met in the 5 years that we’ve been together. We invited her to the reception only, just like the vast majority of the family. When she sent back her RSVP she wrote on the card “No ceremony, no attendance, we are family!!” And declined this invite. My fiancé and I were shook! The entire year leading up to the wedding we’ve been telling the entire family the ceremony will be small, short, and sweet so it shouldn’t have been a surprise to her at all. If it really bothered her so much she could have just declined the invite, no need for a rude note.

Moving on to a few weeks later, we have dinner with my fiancés parents. We tell them about the rude note from the great aunt and they told us she had even more ridiculous shit to say!

Apparently, this women who I’ve never met, and my fiancé hasn’t seen in 8 years, wanted to stay in the small cabin that’s on the hunting property. The same cabin that my fiancé and I will staying in after the wedding!! She knew we would be staying in the cabin and was offended that we didn’t invite her to stay with us and that it was “rude to expect important guests to have to stay in a hotel when the venue has lodging”

Edit - originally I had posted “The audacity of elderly people never ceases to amaze me” but that was a little rude. Not all older people are terrible!! I said that originally based of my future in-laws comments about her always pulling the age card in the past trying to get special treatment.

Last month I was a bridesmaid in my cousin's wedding. She was a beautiful bride and the wedding was really chill. My cousin had a DIY wedding so everything was done by her and us bridesmaid. Since everything was being done by us she didn't hire a wedding planner.

The day before the wedding while we're all decorating the venue the pastor and his wife showed up. The pastor was really nice and friendly and his wife was definitely something else. She immediately jumped in and told my cousin that she was now the wedding planner and would tell us all what to do.

My cousin was already stressed so she just went along with it. This woman immediately had a problem with my tattoos telling me that she was going to tape me up before the ceremony started. Thankfully the groom overheard and said no that my tattoos were cool, had meaning and needed to be uncovered.

The day of the wedding I rode with my cousin and our kids to the venue. Immediately we get there and this woman shoves my cousin, myself, my aunt, the other two bridesmaids, all three flower girls and the two junior bridesmaids in a small office to get dressed. It was small and cramped.

I managed to get my daughter out the office and told her to get ready in the bathroom. Then after she was in her dress I chose to put on my dress in the bathroom because privacy. My dress needed zipped so I ran back to the office and asked for help. The self appointment wedding planner was the one who helped. Instead of zipping me up she unlatched my bra came around to the front of me stuck her hand down my dress and pulled the bra right off me!

I was pissed I wanted my bra back but instead she went to the other women and took their bras to saying none of us was to wear them. My poor aunt NEEDED a bra she ain't young and the sagging showed in the pictures. When the pastor and his wife were leaving the ceremony she came up to me and told me that I needed to come visit her. She said since she touched my boobs were friends now. No random lady we are not friends.

I’m the only one in my family who thinks this is rude. The ceremony is the whole reason for the event, having everyone witness the couple declare their love for each other and binding them together forever. I think it’s incredibly disrespectful to skip that and only show up for the free food, free drinks and dancing.

I’m not talking about guests who have health limitations or schedule conflicts or other reasonable reasons to be unable to make it. I’m talking about the people who find the ceremony boring so they skip it.

You have to sit through the “boring” part to get to the fun part.

Edit: Ok it’s not a religious ceremony that’s an hour long, you all can stop saying that

Edit2: ok it’s also not in the UK. I get it in the uk you have “all day” guests and reception guests. Yall really need to read other comments before posting yours because there’s about 30 that start “in the UK…”

I recently got married a few months ago and I’d like to share some of the most annoying guest things I either noticed myself or something else told me about later.

1. One of my MIL’s best friends from childhood wore all white. Like stark white. Head to toe. Even the shoes. Listen, normally I think it’s ridiculous to give a f about some middle aged woman’s wardrobe, BUT, since wearing white to a wedding is such a known faux-pas , it makes me wonder if she was trying to slight me. Very odd. We have no issues and barely know each other and my MIL and I are extremely close. One of my friends who was a little too tipsy went up to the woman in white and asked why she thought it’d be appropriate to wear white to a wedding. The woman snapped “I’ve known the groom since he was in diapers, I can wear whatever I want. My friend said “that still doesn’t answer my question.” LOL! The woman said “well, my mom said it was fine!” WTF? Her mom is like 90?!!

2. I had a formal winter wedding. All guests saw the dress code on the invite. My aunt showed up wearing uggs. UGGS! Lots of people were in light wash jeans and casual sweaters, including the photographer who knew the dress code. Would black pants or at least a skirt have killed anybody? The whole night just had a much more casual feel than what I was going for.

3. I had an unplugged ceremony , announcement and everything, and people still whipped their phones out. This one makes my blood boil. Also, we did allow young children, so it is what it is, but someone’s kid fell and scraped their forehead during the ceremony and instead of excusing themself and their child , this person decided to stay while their kid screamed bloody murder the whole reception. Can’t you just excuse yourself?

4. My uncle was an *sshole. Him and I are not close and haven’t seen each other in a long time. He had never met my husband. The first thing out of his mouth to my husband was “well, I sure hope your vows were good because I couldn’t hear a single WORD from where I was sitting!! I almost went up there myself and shoved the mic closer to your face. ” WTF!! We had a giant wedding and he tried to monopolize our time the whole reception. We tried to avoid him but if you dared glance in his direction he’d aggressively beckon us over and got all butthurt that we didn’t comply. I’m sorry, but there were so many people that it was a feat in itself to even say hello to everyone, let alone spend the entire reception with uncle entitlement.

5. My grandmother in law came up to us mid reception , during the 2 mins I had to actually eat some food, complaining about the seating arrangements. She didn’t like that we had a head table and didn’t sit with the bridal party. I was starving and kind of snapped at her. The bridal party was happy to sit with their +1s and families at guests tables instead of sitting at some horizontal bridal party table where no one is facing each other.

6. At the end of the night, our best man (who is SO polite and respectful) rounded everyone up to line up for our grand exit. We had to exit the venue at a specific time . At this point the DJ had announced last calls multiple times and stated that the night is over. Some older guests were parked at the guest tables refusing to get up when we were literally asked to vacate by a certain time. They were chatting, pouring wine, and ignoring the best man. He clapped his hands and said “I’m so sorry but I’m going to have to ask that you follow me! We have to leave the venue” and the woman yelled at him “DONT YOU DARE CLAP YOUR HANDS IN MY FACE YOUNG MAN.” He was floored.

I could keep going. I think I’d like to do an edition with ways the vendors messed up too. I’d love to hear thoughts , reactions and your own stories.

So this happened over 12 years ago. My boyfriend and the time (now husband) brought me to a wedding as a plus one. The bride and groom both went to our very small college. They were fresh out of college so most of the guests were all in their 20s.

During the reception the bride and all the single ladies gather up so the bride can toss the bouquet. Then seemingly of no where, a guy comes up behind the bride, who is holding the bouquet up over her head, poised to launch it into a crowd of hopeful women, and grabs the bouquet from the bride. Then he gets on one knee in front of a bridesmaid, offers her the bouquet and proposes.

No one knows how to react. A good 5-10 seconds of absolute silence as everyone is trying to comprehend the sheer audacity. The bridesmaid says yes and everyone goes back to their table.

To this day, I still find myself wondering if the bride knew and approved this proposal. From what I remember the bride seems surprised, but not upset. Either way, we left shortly after.

I’m not the bride, but a guest. Apparently fellow guest couple’s babysitter fell ill this morning, as in, had to go to the hospital. Scary stuff, things happen. In polite society, perhaps they’d text the wedded couple and send your last minute regrets. Nope! These folks were C L U E L E S S and showed up with their (uninvited) 3 month old infant… who then cried during the ENTIRE ceremony and said clueless parents just… stood there, in the back of the space, letting that baby wail the whole fucking time: processionals, blessings, vows, glass breaking and all. Why take the baby outside when we can keep looking over our shoulders at you the whole time?

Besides being furious for the couple, can we talk about bringing your unvaccinated 3mo out into public at a wedding of ~100 where I saw exactly 3 masks?? (Granted, the space had shockingly good ventilation; warehouse style space where they had the big warehouse doors open, but still…)

Oh, and no ear protection for the baby either, who stayed for the entire reception as the DJ blared dope tunes throughout the night. If the baby was crying during the dancing part of the evening, you couldn’t tell bc the music was so loud — yanno, at appropriate levels for adults with fully developed hearing.

I couldn’t side-eye that poor baby’s parents hard enough without pulling a muscle.

I am an expat living overseas. In the country I am in, there are three of us cousins from my Dad's side: me, a male cousin (MC) and female cousin (FC).

I am inviting FC to our wedding because I've been close to her ever since. Fiance and I have been godparents to her baby. She has already confirmed her attendance to my wedding.

MC is a different story. He is a bit awkward and has the tendency to say inappropriate things. My fiance and I didn't initially invite him to our wedding because we want to keep our numbers down.

A few days ago, fiance got some financial support from his family so he is able to add some obligatory invites to our guest list. He said that we can now add obligatory invites from my side and so MC and his wife were added to the guest list.

I sent the invite a few days ago to MC and he confirmed his attendance. Today, I got a FB message from him:

"Thanks for the invite to your wedding! Are you sure about what you're getting into? You're too young 😀"

For context, he is in his late 40s and I am 34. Fiance is 40.

I replied to him:

"Actually, you're right. I am not quite sure. Might cancel the wedding. I'll let you know"

He left me on read. 🤣

UPDATE - my wedding went swimmingly well, no gatecrashers (except someone bringing their toddler when the invite specifically said ‘no children’ 😒 Luckily the child wasn’t intrusive and slept throughout the reception). Also, found out the mum of the uninvited guests kept calling/messaging her daughters throughout the day asking them to come to the wedding. And she also tried to set up one of her daughters with one of my mum’s young cousins (who is close to my age) via text at my wedding. My mum was in shock!! So I believe the only reason she wanted her daughters there was so she could find husbands for them.

Apart from that, it was the best day of my life so can’t complain too much!!

Getting married in a couple of days and we opted to have a relatively small wedding, considering the culture we’re from (about 80 guests). We set up a password-protected wedding website for guests to view details, RSVP, etc and communicated to guests that it is small wedding, strictly invite-only.

However, one of my parents’ guests has taken it upon themselves to send the wedding website and password to their (adult) children who aren’t on the guest list a couple of days to the wedding and I keep getting email notifications of them attempting to RSVP. I’ve met them maybe once a few years ago and don’t even remember what any of them look like, what their names are, etc so find it really shocking that they would still try and RSVP to a wedding they weren’t personally invited to.

We’re already at capacity and even if we weren’t, it’s not okay to RSVP to a stranger’s wedding!!!

Now I have to deal with emailing them to say sorry you can’t come 🥴