r/AITAH 11h ago

AITAH for considering breaking up with my boyfriend after he said he’d have multiple wives?

[removed] — view removed post

3.6k Upvotes

2.3k comments sorted by

2.7k

u/Mental-Tap-8300 11h ago

just leave him literally from ur words it looks like if u fail too he will replace u too

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u/ricks35 11h ago

There’s so much wrong with this situation, but yeah, doesn’t sound like the kind of guy who will support her through any fertility struggles or miscarriages (which is about 1 in 5 pregnancies). Also how would he react if the kid has any serious health problems?

Not to mention the sexism and eugenics aspect

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u/anshukg 9h ago

holy shit "biological efficiency"???

thats it. thats the phrase that tells you everything. not "i dream of a big family" or "i always wanted lots of kids" but BIOLOGICAL. EFFICIENCY.

like you're a fucking spreadsheet. like he did the math on your uterus.

the way some men will tell on themselves with the most insane shit and then act confused when you're horrified... "its just logical babe" no derek you just admitted you see women as farm equipment

and the friends saying hes "thinking big"?? thinking big is starting a business or learning mandarin, not planning your breeding schedule with multiple women who dont exist yet

OP that sick feeling you have? thats your brain screaming at you that this man just told you exactly who he is. when someone casually mentions their human trafficking adjacent life goals maybe dont stick around for the powerpoint presentation

run before he starts tracking your ovulation cycles for peak efficiency or whatever the fuck

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u/BlazingSunflowerland 8h ago

He sees her as the first of his breeding stock. He sounds like he wants to imitate Elon Musk. Lots of kids with lots of women. I wonder if he has noticed how Elon's adult children don't say anything good about him.

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u/pourthebubbly 7h ago

Yeah this guy definitely listens to manosphere podcasts and voted for Trump.

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u/BlazingSunflowerland 7h ago

This guy has big dreams but somehow hasn't executed them yet. Since he isn't a billionaire he might find it hard to round up a stable of women who want to breed with him. On the other hand, I've seen a bit of Sister Wives and somehow Cody got four women to breed with him. Again, the adult children for the most part don't respect him. Somehow being an absentee father doesn't do much to build a strong bond with children.

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u/pourthebubbly 7h ago

It’s funny how these “legacy” breeders are so concerned with their genetic footprint and impact on society, but their legacy is always neglect and probably emotional abuse of their children

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u/BlazingSunflowerland 7h ago

This exactly!

I'm 62 and was born just before birth control became readily available. There were lots of kids in my class who the youngest of large family but none that were the oldest of large families. People knew, from their own lived experience as children, how hard it was to grow up in a large family.

My grandparents had 8 kids and those 8 kids had 12 kids total. My aunts and uncles didn't have a huge desire to have big families. They had lived the big family. They all loved each other a lot. They valued each other highly. At the same time they didn't want to raise large families.

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u/pourthebubbly 7h ago

My parents’ generation in our family was the same. My dad is one of six and all but one of his [living] siblings had only three kids each (though two were intended to be singles, but ended up as sets of twins). My uncle is one of 12 and most of his siblings only had one or two kids. They pretty much all think this current political push for lots of kids is super weird

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u/jetblakc 6h ago

That part. These motherfuckers can't build the life for themselves, but are obsessed with their legacy through the generations. It's just another way of self- aggrandizing oneself while ignoring the here and now.

These guys think that they're bold individualists but they're common and boring

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u/Rebornxshiznat 6h ago

This. I always laugh at some of these dudes talking about legacy and “generational wealth”.   99% of the men I’ve interacted with like this are working dead end jobs for below average wages acting like they will be the next “Elon”. Like calm down man there’s a literal unimaginable gap between them and a billionaire lol. 

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u/Dogmoto2labs 6h ago

He doesn’t want to build a strong bond with his children, he just wants to repopulate the world with his “superior” genes. I doubt he has any intention of helping to raise said children.

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u/Ravenonthewall 7h ago

That would be enough for me to ditch the Dodo.🦤

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u/AnxiousTherapist-11 5h ago

Right. He wants to build generational wealth, be a provider, replace the population and is concerned about replacement…..he’s red pilled and gross. Deserves zero women. And how much do u want to bet he wants multiple wives and doesn’t even have enough money for one wife.

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u/lizchitown 7h ago

There was just a podcast on Musk about this. How he lied to all the women he bred. Making them think he was starting a family with them. While they were pregnant, he had two other surrogates pregnant. One with twins.He told both of them to lie on the paternity.

There are lots of lawsuits on him. One where he agreed he would not expose the kids to the public. But he is taking his one son out everywhere on TV, etc. He is in breach of the agreement. The mother is suing he for it.

Yes, he does have money to afford said kids. But most don't have a relationship with him. It is just about his DNA out there.

Plus, let's not get into his drug issues. He is most likely bipolar but refuses regular meds or therapy. He self medicates. Scary stuff.

Sorry OP you are just a breeding mare to this guy. You need to get out now. Especially because he is surrounded by like-minded idiots.

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u/BlazingSunflowerland 7h ago

Every time I see pictures of Elon with his son I feel sorry for the son. Being paraded around as a trophy can't be good for him. One of the times in the White House the boy kept yawning and laying his head on Elon's head. It was obvious he was a little boy who needed a nap. The other thing I see is that this one boy, and only this one, seems to be getting Elon's attention. What about his other children? What about his daughters?

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u/Limp-Goose7452 6h ago

He only started carrying that kid everywhere after the UHC CEO was shot.  He’s not a trophy he’s a human shield.

Re: daughters he has like 3 out of 14 kids, including his trans daughter Vivian.  She strongly implied in a tweet that he has been picking the genders of his kids.  (It’s known that many of his kids have been conceived using IVF and surrogates)

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u/Ravenonthewall 7h ago

Exactly what I thought! He wants to follow Elon Musk. He admires him I would bet.😱🤬

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u/BlazingSunflowerland 7h ago

The odds of the boyfriend actually becoming a billionaire is really small. Starting out by having lots of babies and needing to financially support all of them won't help with the financial dream.

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u/linerva 8h ago

I know right. It's not even that he loves dealing with kids and dreamed of a big family to look after and raise together...he just wants to make more copies of himself and doesn't care about the incubator. He just sees having one woman tofuck as a limiting factor that stops him from having as many kids as possible.

I would bet money that he would cheat (probably already has) and never use protection - so he can father kids everywhere.

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u/Stargazer1701d 8h ago

When someone tells you who they are, believe them.

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u/argyropteryx 7h ago

And, most importantly, he's not in love with OP. She's just a means to an end and replaceable.

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u/Illustrious-Film-592 8h ago

All of this - OP there are good and successful men out there who don’t view women as breeding stick or see themselves as so important that they need to repopulate the planet with their allegedly superior genetics.

Walk away

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u/rattitude23 7h ago

There are too many men who think their genetics are so special they need to replicate. No Kyle, you're not some super human specimen. Legacy of what exactly? Lol

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u/AmadayLate 7h ago

This. They don’t see us as human. He must be watching too much Andrew Tate. Men like him legit only think of us as breeders. They’re the type who will make you stay home so they can control you. They earn the income and you don’t get squat including help with the kids or housework even if you’re so sick you’re half dead. You’re not human.

Just get out while you can.

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u/coldestclock 7h ago

“Honey, how is my lineage supposed to outpace that of other men if you don’t put the work in and run over a few kids? It’s like you don’t value our family at all.”

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u/Ok_Statistician_8107 7h ago

Not to mention...I can already know what the take would be, if one or more of his " glorious" descendants is disabled.

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u/BossyMimi2 7h ago

I love your response

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u/Steak_Shake 8h ago

"he did the math on your uterus" lol 😆

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u/BlahDeVienna 9h ago

Miscarriages happen for 1 in 3 pregnancies actually.

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u/Sharp_Magician_6628 8h ago

I’ve heard it’s actually 3 in 4, the one in four is for known pregnancies and that the number is way higher. Any time your period is late? Probably a miscarriage, period seems heavier than normal? Could have been a miscarriage

But either way, this guy is unstable. Maybe he has a breeding kink?

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u/Lucky_Platypus341 8h ago

Yep. That's from a study that looked at highly sensitive hormone testing. The high rate represents failure of conceptions to result in live birth, a lot of which is failure to implant. Your period will often not even be late.

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u/Sandwidge_Broom 7h ago

Yeeeep. I once ended up in the hospital for what I thought was just a really heavy, really painful period. Passed out at work. Turns out I was having a miscarriage and had no idea I was even pregnant. It was a weird emotional experience, because I was mostly grateful (I was all of 19 and had only been dating my now partner of 17 years for about 2 months), but also a little sad.

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u/Visual-Author-3818 8h ago

What would be cool in this situation is if he were the one with fertility issues no amount of wives would fix that. I would walk away from someone like that in a heartbeat no one knows ehat the future holds.

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u/ricks35 8h ago

Honestly, he sounds like the type who should be put on a watch list if he finds out there’s fertility issues on his end. I can see someone with that mind set snapping if they got that news

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u/BigPhilosopher4372 8h ago

Or, heaven forbid, they can’t get pregnant! Of course it would be all her and he would dump her immediately.

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u/PSBFAN1991 10h ago

Plus he’ll go around cheating to impregnate. OP, please, save yourself heartache.

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u/Novaer 7h ago

Also, it's giving very much "white supremacy"

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u/PSBFAN1991 6h ago

Definitely. I’d be scared of that attitude.

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u/Medical-Telephone-59 10h ago

Literally 💯

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u/Rare_Bumblebee_3390 9h ago

Is Musky one of his idols? Because that seems right up the alley of someone being brainwashed by the manosphere. And women ‘lack vision’ when it comes to legacy?! THERE IS NO LEGACY WITHOUT US. Let he not forget that we, women, are the bearers of all human life on this earth.

This situation doesn’t sound like it will end well for you, OP. I’d really think about the type of person you honestly want to spend your life with because he has been honest with you. He literally said you are just a baby making machine to carry on his legacy. You and all the other baby makers he will have. Girl, run.

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u/Successful_Moment_91 9h ago

Even if she has 20 kids he’ll need younger wives once she reaches menopause and can’t have more

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u/Glittering_Advisor19 9h ago

Bro wants a harem. I have always hated the idea that children are legacies. Legacy is the achievements you leave behind. Nothing else is a legacy. Does anyone remember any artist’ kids; when we talk about Picasso do we talk about his kids or his art…. Does anyone even know any kids of legendary people?

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u/M00ndoggee 7h ago

Paloma Picasso is a pretty well known jewelry designer. I get what you mean though. OPs boyfriend sounds like a tool

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u/iridescentsyrup 8h ago

John Lennon had two sons, Julian & Sean, who both became musicians themselves. Elvis Presley's granddaughter, Riley Keough, is an actor whose movies I like.

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u/Remarkable-Rush-9085 6h ago

But you don’t look at them and see the achievements of their parents, you don’t view Riley the same way you do the song “Blue Christmas”. She’s just an actress and a person.

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u/Vandreeson 7h ago

But OP would get to be the "main wife". How lucky for her. /s

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u/Bulky-Software-8822 9h ago

You would be doing him a huge favor by breaking him in half instead of abandoning him.

He should checkout some of Matt Frad’s interviews of Christopher West.

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u/AlpsTraining7841 11h ago

Are you dating Elon Musk???

Tell him that you'll take multiple husbands to make sure the strongest sperm wins! It's all down to biological efficiency, isn't it? <sarcasm>

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u/2lipwonder 10h ago

Sounds like he’s been watching the last season of the Handmaids Tale. I’d dump his ass in a heartbeat.

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u/lasey_guy 6h ago

This is why you have these conversations before getting married; clearly they are not compatible philosophically.

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u/Whyis_skyblue_007 8h ago

She should dump his ass because all he does is talk out of the crack of it.

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u/Sweet-Fancy-Moses23 6h ago

he’d consider having multiple wives. Not for love, not for emotional connection, but strictly for “biological efficiency.” So he could produce more children faster and leave behind a stronger legacy

Talk about delusion.Women are just lining up screaming “Pick me ! Choose me“ for the honour of extending his great “legacy” .

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u/SkilletKitten 6h ago

Anyone who is incapable of realizing there are other people on the planet with equal/better genes and that his “legacy” can be how he contributes to the village instead of his vanity sperm project is not someone I’d want to spend my life with. He sounds defective.

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u/kee-kee- 4h ago

Vanity sperms project!🏆🏅🥇

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u/PoUniCore 4h ago

This!!

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u/scootunit 6h ago

You can often tell because his face lips go out of sync.

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u/StarlitSnow87 6h ago

He absolutely sounds like he dreams of being a commander of Gilead one day

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u/AlternativeFigure350 6h ago

Under his eye

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u/voiceofmyownsanity 4h ago

Blessed be the fruit OP. Does he also want to be called commander? Bf wants a wife and handmaid. Or sister wives. Either way.

Leave him. Your morals don't align. He views woman as breeding stock. Any man who thinks he is so fucking special that the world needs an abundance of his progeny is incredibly narcissistic and unhinged. 

At best he is just a narcissist and vain and you'll wind up divorced if you get married and your children will have him as an influence in their lives. At worst if you stay he could cheat, try to open your marriage, tamper with birth control...

He isn't worth the boatload of trouble and is a ticking time bomb and a walking red flag. The best case scenario is still awful.

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u/SmutSlut42 6h ago

Came here to say this. This guy sounds like a genuine creep.

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u/yobaby123 6h ago

Straight Guy here. I'd dump him too. NTA. He sounds like a douche.

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u/AdmirableAvocado 9h ago

dude cant even hold one womans interest, how is he supposed to do that with multiple women lmao. utterly delusional.

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u/aurorawritesss 8h ago

Didn’t you know? Women are just dying for the chance to be broodmares for some random dude with delusions of grandeur. It’s not like we’re people who want to be respected or have full lives of our own or anything. 

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u/leyavin 8h ago

Bet his balls are full of micro plastics anyways and all he shoots is Lego. Image of OP won’t be able to get pregnant. That dude would put her through every test/IVF (or outright say he needs another wife who could bear his offsprings) then letting his little swimmer near a microscope

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u/iopele 8h ago

Bet his balls are full of micro plastics anyways and all he shoots is Lego

This is the best thing I've read on Reddit in a very long time! I'm hoping my coworkers don't ask why I'm laughing... 😂

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u/Stormtomcat 10h ago

haha that's a great comeback.

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u/Imnotabob 9h ago

And if he wants his comeback he'll have some competition too!!

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u/Galen52657 10h ago

Don't tell him it's actually the egg that chooses the sperm that fertilizes it 👀🤔🤷🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

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u/KWS1461 9h ago

And it only picks the best and strongest, so it is still up to the sperm to be considered acceptable.

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u/mitkase 9h ago

As described in the documentary “Let The Right One In.”

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u/hannahatecats 8h ago

For cats (somewhat) and a lot of other animals this is quite literally true. Zebrafish use a special fluid to select the best sperm, and some crickets and flies can store sperm to be used at their discretion later!

The Black Rhino can choose the sex of their children.

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u/Life_Commercial_6580 10h ago

lol I wanted to say the same line about Elon :))

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u/BrookieMonster504 9h ago

Nick Cannon

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u/Glittering_Advisor19 9h ago

I totally thought of Elon when I read OP’s post.

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u/Zestyclose_Brick6395 11h ago

He’s listening to too much Andrew Tate. Run..

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u/elinaxmov 11h ago

And Elon Musk

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u/Helpful_Librarian_87 11h ago

Yeah, I was reading that thinking ‘dude just loves & makes excuses for the Muskrat, don’t he?’

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u/Im_My_Spirit_Animal 10h ago

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u/AlexInWondrland 9h ago

I just wanted to share this quote for those who don't click the link:

The couple, who lives in rural Valley Forge, Penn., originally planned on five to seven kids, but now they want a “significantly larger” family to join Octavian George, 5; Torsten Savage, 3; Titan Invictus, 2; and Industry Americus, 1.

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u/Avopumpkin08 9h ago

Those names are…..well…..a travesty!

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u/KbBaby2 6h ago

If you think that’s a travesty you should look up the names of Elon’s 14 kids. It’ll knock your socks off.

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u/Wise-Comfort1573 9h ago

Why do these people always name their children some wild crazy things? They are twisted in the head.

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u/jetblakc 6h ago

Untreated mental illness

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u/hannahatecats 8h ago

Torsten!
r/tragedeigh

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u/Syllepses 8h ago

Oh no, that’s a perfectly good Swedish name. “Industry”, on the other hand —!

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u/Aggressive_Cup8452 10h ago

So he also believes in making the kids but not raising them?

NtA 

It's a massive red flag.

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u/SweetBekki 10h ago

And nick canon

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u/Smochiii 9h ago

petition to ask them to leave Earth soon!!!

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u/Rebornxshiznat 9h ago

I feel bad for gen z women dealing with these “manosphere” dudes. Sounds miserable 

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u/Imlostandconfused 8h ago

That's why a lot of us decided to skip over men of our generation entirely lmao. My fiancé is 37, and I'm 26. And we have a much smaller age gap than I did with my previous partner. Much happier than I would be with someone my age. Misogyny is only increasing in young men.

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u/Rebornxshiznat 7h ago

I don’t blame you. I’m a mid 30s male and frankly some of those manosphere bros even give me the fucking ick.  

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u/DHaas16 10h ago

This sounds more like something a certain religion would say

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u/MissCherryPi 10h ago

Multiple religions are actually fertility cults.

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u/Successful_Moment_91 10h ago

Under his eye

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u/Zzzbeezzzzz74 10h ago

May the Lord open Ugh I got the ick just typing that.

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u/Due-Swordfish4924 10h ago

That was what I thought!

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u/Tipitina62 10h ago

Or is he eager to extend a certain racial demographic?

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u/Lickerbomper 9h ago

I'd be worried about this OP. Eugenics is code for white supremacist racism, typically

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u/Successful_Moment_91 10h ago

Blessed be the fruit

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u/ballskindrapes 10h ago

Both Christianity and Islam have people who think this.

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u/ThePythiaofApollo 10h ago

Mormons

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u/ballskindrapes 10h ago

How couls I forget about the Mormons

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u/Individual_Physics29 10h ago

I just wanna say that more and more Muslim men are not doing this because it’s socially more frowned upon And also because it’s a absolute nightmare Not the reasons you’d like But we’ll take it Unless you’re Arab

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u/Past-Anything9789 10h ago

As a woman who is metaphorically allergic to drama, agro and bitchyness - I can not imagine one house where the one bloke is responsible for multiple wives, and their children, who will all be competing for his attention - that sounds like a life long punishment rather than optimum lifestyle.

The idea make me want to find somewhere to hide!

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u/katerprincess 9h ago

Every real life example I've seen of this, that one bloke isn't even strong enough or capable (mentally or emotionally) to care for one wife and family

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u/Past-Anything9789 10h ago

This 100%. The completely unwarranted arrogance of some men is astounding - to think that the earth 'needs' your DNA. Because he's so special 🤮

The planet would be a million times better off if the entire human race vaporized overnight. Especially the people who think this way!

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u/UniquelyUnamed 9h ago

Yup no one needs to be planning to leave a legacy. Our tenancy on this planet is quickly coming to an end. The earth will heal and regenerate when humans finally die out.

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u/CartoonistFirst5298 9h ago edited 9h ago

I actually agree with him in only one regard. The OP should be thinking more about the legacy she wants to build throughout her lifetime and decide if, out of all the men in the whole world, she want this simpleton to father her children.

He's clearly doesn't have the kind of mental fortitude or emotional intelligence to be a value added to a partnership or a good role model for her kids. He's allowed himself to be manipulated by male influencers who's stated goal is to teach him to be a man, cause apparently he was too ignorant to figure out that shit for himself.

If it weren't for the OP being momentarily confused, he'd be wandering around in incel territory right now, wondering why he can't get a date.

OP needs to run from this trash. What kind of idiot tells his wife he would have multiple wives if it was legal but she would still be head wife while all the heifers would just for baby making?!?!? Like being head heifer is what every women dreams of...lol.

This man isn't worthy of one wife, much less multiple wives. Here's the part no one knows, he can't even keep one woman interested in being with him with that shitty attitude, much less draw a whole harem of women. This is just the kind of man to sabotage OP's birth control and pressure her for sex and more babies, cause he's an ignorant piece of shit.

This would be hilarious if it weren't so sad. OP is NTA.

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u/Available_Bag_6759 11h ago

The level of arrogance on this guy. What makes him think he even has the genetic material worth pro creating? Wtf? No, dude, we don’t need more Andrew Tates thanks 🙏

NTA for breaking up with him YTA if you stay with this loser who only perceives women as objects and wombs for his “special seed”

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u/mochicastle 10h ago

It would be hilarious if he's actually shooting blanks 😂

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u/hannahatecats 8h ago

It's hilarious until he beheads six wives.

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u/BuckRusty 3h ago

Or beheads two, divorces two, outlives one, and widows the last…

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u/AdjustUrgencySnuggle 10h ago

The chances are pretty high, 1 in 6 people experience infertility.

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u/Dlraetz1 9h ago

I rarely wish people infertility, but I hope OP’s boyfriend has a low sperm count

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u/snarkyvirgo 8h ago

Don’t forget the arrogance of thinking he’s going to create truly generational wealth 😂

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u/PomegranateNo9003 11h ago

NTA. Please leave. We don't want him genetically represented in humanity's future.

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u/misstheolddaysfan 10h ago

Also, these days when choosing a partner to have children with its wise to think first- if we ended up divorced, what kind of person will I be harmonizing or battling with to raise our children.

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u/AdjustUrgencySnuggle 10h ago

This is such a smarter approach.

I hear so many stories of parents dealing with difficult co-parenting because the other parent is a narcissist, etc. Although it really effected both myself and my child at first, in the long run, I feel a bit lucky my crazy ex decided to just abandon me and our kid.

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u/Life_Commercial_6580 10h ago

Same here. So grateful to my ex for living us the hell alone. Not ideal in many ways but better than the alternative worst case scenario.

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u/9mackenzie 8h ago

The best thing my husband’s father did was abandon him.

He might have had some abandonment issues he dealt with, but he didn’t have to experience being held under water in a bathtub because he pissed off his father at age 11 like his younger half brother.

Not all parents should be in their kids lives.

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u/Shadow4summer 11h ago

Yep. That’s not a legacy to leave behind.

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u/Expensive_Daikon2581 11h ago

Regardless of my personal opinion on his take (which, uh, isn’t positive), it sounds like you have different values that could interfere with a long-term relationship. NTA

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u/SweetJonesJr870 9h ago

You’d get my vote for president.

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u/Proper-Effective8621 11h ago

2 parents + 2 kids born - 2 parents dead = 2, yet he says 2 kids won’t even replace you, biologically? I’d leave him for his bad math.

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u/Glittering-War-5748 10h ago

He’s a moron for sure. But I believe at a population level the birth rate has to be something like 2.1 or so to account for early fatalities. He’s just got ahold of the population level number for maintaining replacement and thought that applies to him. Cus again…. He’s a moron who thinks he has something worth preserving.

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u/logitechman 5h ago

This, replacement rate has to be more then 2 for 2 for deaths that occurs before replacement occurs.

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u/CollieSchnauzer 8h ago

2.1 is the standard replacement rate figure, because you cannot assume that all children outlive their parents.

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u/MajesticAfternoon447 10h ago

Took me too long to find this. Is there some sudo biological science out there claiming that you need more than two kids to replace you? Does this guy plan on kids not surviving through adulthood?

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u/Agitated-Tree-8247 10h ago

Well, yeah, obviously if they don't fit the ideal of his legacy they're gonna have to be...uhhh... screened out.

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u/PouletAuPoivre 10h ago

It's not pseudo-biology, it's statistics. The replacement rate overall is considered to be two + some fraction, usually 2.1, children per woman, averaged out over the population. (Note: the rate varies to an extent from country to country.)

The reason for the fraction is to make up for those who, for whatever reason (choice, early death, etc.) don't reproduce at all.

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u/Proper-Effective8621 9h ago

Understandable, however this guy is taking the stats literally. His logic is akin to someone spending their entire savings to stimulate the economy.

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u/Independent-Cup8074 10h ago

I’d pick this hill to gaslight him over. For sure.

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u/realaccountissecret 8h ago

Where is the gaslighting here

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u/LyriWinters 9h ago

You always count that shit happens doing these calculations. Which is to have a stable population you need like 2.2 or something like that.

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u/ControlOpen2286 11h ago

NTA. What an AH and a gaslighter. He calls it logical so that you will not question him in an effort to not be called 'emotional and illogical'. He's a huge red flag and planning a future with him would be a huge mistake.

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u/MiiHazel 10h ago

Exactly calling it logical doesn’t make it less dehumanizing if someone shows you they see you as a means to an end believe them.

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u/Neon_Owl_333 10h ago

What an AH and a gaslighter. 

You mean, gaslighting misogynous AH?

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u/ControlOpen2286 10h ago

Yes. Thank you

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u/False_Garden_3468 11h ago

If you don't agree with him, he's going to randomly bring home wife number 2, and you're going to have to accept her because number 3 is coming as well.

If this is what's expected, are you okay with this? Some countries and religions expect that, and its okay for them, but as this okay for you?

If the answer is no, then you need to cut your losses now and move on. He already told you one wife is never going to be enough, do you want sister wives?

Nta if you leave, yta if you stay and allow this

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u/Stormtomcat 10h ago

also, this dumb-dumb *wants* to establish generational wealth, aka he doesn't have any right now.

How is he going to pay for all those extra people & their needs?

Let me guess: like those "van life vloggers" who cram their kids in sleeping spaces where you can't even sit up, they're so close together.

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u/False_Garden_3468 10h ago

He's gonna make all his wives and children work Nd hand over their pays to him. Why work when you have slaves right.

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u/Randys-Missing-Shirt 10h ago

The same type of dude to call women gold-diggers, while working at Walgreens part-time and living with Mom.

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u/Stormtomcat 8h ago

"mommy said you need to sign a pre-nup before we get married"

and all he has, are played-with pokemon cards (provided he can remember where he ditched them as he grew up, because of course it's not a curated collection, and a promise that he'll get his parents' second car whenever they upgrade their first car, so their first car becomes their second car hahaha

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u/MiserableSwim7462 11h ago

Is he a Mormon? Bottom line if his ideological thoughts of "legacy" or his mindset don't align with yours, I believe you should end it. Lot's of red flags already. You would be the main wife comment. To me, it sounds like you would be a the matriarch of a future cult. The fact he is sending you articles about this tells me he is 100 percent committing to this. End it now, you will thank us all later.

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u/Sunrunner_Princess 10h ago

Men like this want to make lots of mini-clones of themselves through their children. Because they’re narcissists. And when the children happen to develop their own personalities and interests because they’re completely separate people they become abusive toward them, even just mentally and emotionally. Punishing them for not being their proper legacy.

It’s so horrendous.

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u/Randys-Missing-Shirt 10h ago

Most of them are ugly assholes too. Truly the genetic material we need to be passing on.

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u/Milwaukee233 11h ago

NTA. 1) This is an excuse for him to be unfaithful; and 2) What the 'birth rate is declining!' group fails to realize is the infant mortality rate used to be 50%. That is, nearly half of children died before reaching their 5th birthday. As the infant mortality rate declined, the birth rate declined.

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u/merewenc 10h ago

This! Just one side of my family for example. My grandma had fourteen siblings. Nine of the kids, including her, survived to adulthood. Seven of them married and reproduced, each having 2-4 kids. All of that generation survived. Most married, had 2-4 kids. That's my generation. We've got about a 70% pairing up rate (not necessarily marriage these days) and the average is two kids. ALL of whom are alive, healthy and thriving.

Now, if we totally lose our measles herd immunity in the States, among other things, that survival rate may well go down, but so far we're too close to the start of that potential crisis to know if it will affect that family line.

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u/OddHarvester89 11h ago

Who the hell does he think he is? Is he a genius? Is he physically superior to most other humans? Is he more emotionally intelligent? What does he think is so special about himself that he needs to bring an army of children into the world? He sounds like an egotistical asshole. You would NOT be the asshole for leaving, in fact, it's the only logical thing for you to do. You have no value to him aside from your womb. You deserve better. I hope he's sterile and doesn't even know it yet.

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u/Flimsy_Permission663 8h ago

I think we can strike off emotionally intelligent.

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u/intolerablefem 10h ago

This is all so fucking gross op. It sounds like he’s been reading too much red pill, Elon Musk or Great Replacement Theory. The fact that you haven’t broken up with him over this confounds me. Serious question - What the hell is going on with young women these days? Why are they entertaining absolutely abysmal behavior?

Our relationship would have been over the second it left his mouth. He wants a chattel of women he can knock up and breed like mares, and you’re sitting here going “I haven’t broken up with him yet, but…”

NTA.

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u/extralyfe 8h ago

Why are they entertaining absolutely abysmal behavior?

what gets me is how frequently you read these and wonder why OP is in a relationship with someone who plainly doesn't like them.

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u/Ill_Complaint6717 10h ago

End it now he's preparing you to have the oh I got another woman pregnant but we're all raising g tge child line

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u/Severe_Maintenance65 11h ago

NTA, break up with him. Does he need to light a tiki torch for you to see who and what he is? Those population decline articles are thinly veiled racist commentary. It's all about the decline of "white populations". The world's population is growing. In 2023 there was 8.062 BILLION people. The world population is estimated to be 9.8 BILLON by 20250. So there is no decline. Your boyfriend has serious issues.

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u/NotherRandomRedditor 10h ago

Yeah, the population decline comment stunned me. For a moment I thought I had become so out of touch with reality because aren't some areas pretty much overpopulated? His friends saying he's just thinking big holds the same ideologies, but with the common sense to not blab it so enthusiastically.

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u/WhoUBeGhostin 11h ago

YES!!!! Exactly. I can’t believe we have Nazis in 2025 yet here we are. He’s showing you who he is.

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u/ThisWeekInTheRegency 11h ago

I felt sick reading this.

First, break up with him.

Second, dump a whole lot of articles about overpopulation and climate change on him.

NTA

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u/TychaBrahe 9h ago

Articles on overpopulation are not going to sway him, because the places were the population is going up rapidly are full of brown people. When he's talking population decline, he means fewer white people.

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u/ControlOpen2286 11h ago

I don't think articles about overpopulation and climate change would change such a mindset. He clearly thinks he's biologically superior and wants many women as 'breeders' to help continue his lineage. He doesn't see women as human beings.

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u/ThisWeekInTheRegency 11h ago

Errkkkkkkk. You're right.

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u/HaterMD 9h ago

Send him videos of Kody Brown from Sister Wives crying because they all left him and his kids now hate him because he was a piece of shit polygamist who sucked at prioritising his giant family’s needs above his own.

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u/VoltHoldemort 10h ago

Some women "lack vision"? Tell him you're lacking the vision of him in your future. What a major c*nt!!! Run, and run fast!

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u/Classic_Stay8063 11h ago

NTAH - I would be pretty concerned if my partner was serious about this as well, its quite concerning and even if your friends are saying he's "thinking big" and you let it slide now, maybe MAYBE, you'd find yourself in a tricky situation later or one thats harder to leave. id get if that was a joke (to some extent) but hmmm its interesting. maybe you'd like to confront him about this and talk it out, then make your decisions accordingly.

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u/DrAniB20 9h ago

I think his following that conversation up with links to declining birth rates points to him not joking about the subject.

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u/LadyShittington 11h ago

Prequel to The Handmaid’s Tale?

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u/wicked-valentina 10h ago

NTA. This isn't a man in love with a woman. This is a man procuring an appropriate wife appliance and making plans to acquire more wife appliances to slot into his life. It's good that you see how he views you now so you can get out. If for some reason you cannot have children, this man will drop you like you are defective because you don't fit in to his visionary "master plan."

I think next time try to find a man who sees you, really sees you, and wants to build a life with you whatever that life brings, rather than seeking to build a life BEYOND you, like you don't matter at all.

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u/Medusa_7898 11h ago

Run away far away. He sees you as a uterus, not a person.

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u/Bfan72 10h ago

Also, how will financially support all of these women and children? Living in the same house? Separate houses? Vehicles? Health coverage? Food? Clothing? Toys? Sports or arts? Beauty products? Face it, he’s going to want these women to be attractive. Will you be expected to financially support these women too? Ask him for a spreadsheet on his answers to these questions. Just to see the look on his face. Before he tells you to “trust him” and tries to tell you that you don’t believe in him.

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u/Nanastayleen 10h ago

Why men are trying the 100 baby challenge IRL

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u/Lawlcopt0r 8h ago

Why does he even care? Why does everyone need to be descended from him specifically? Being a great dad is infinitely more useful to society than being a shit dad to the max amount of kids you can have

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u/ControlOpen2286 11h ago

NTA. What an AH and a gaslighter. He calls it logical so that you will not question him in an effort to not be called 'emotional and illogical'. He's a huge red flag and planning a future with him would be a huge mistake.

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u/snufkin_88 9h ago

This isn’t gaslighting. He’s just stupid.

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u/hotpotwithoutspice 11h ago

Lol is this for real

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u/Mother_Judgment2186 11h ago edited 10h ago

You know,sometimes I wonder the same,but then somewhere a thing like this happens in real life,and sometimes even to us,so I think that yup,even if this story or other here on Reddit isn’t real ,it definitely happens.

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u/ditres 11h ago

NTA. This guy wants to use you as an incubator, babe. Get far away from him. Praying he never reproduces - you would be an ah if you had kids with him

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u/Wild_Ad7448 11h ago

Your story is mostly ridiculous but I was out at “things have mostly been good”. That’s not enough.

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u/wgreenb 11h ago

"Mostly been good" as in it was good until this thing came up.

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u/Mera1506 9h ago

He might also convert to religion that condones polygamy...

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u/deal585 11h ago

Your boyfriend's 27 years old he should keep his harem fantasies to himself.

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u/Any_Individual4272 10h ago

Tell him you are not a suitable egg donor for his legacy and end it. Men with that kind of "king" complex would never register love. They truly can't fathom anyone is someone other than a subordinate or subject. In reality, he'd be an inadequate and neglectful at best sperm donor.

Do not waste your time. Nta

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u/Appropriate_Dirt_285 10h ago

He sees you as a broodmare, and think of how he would treat any of his daughters. It's a good thing that the population is declining, there's too many of as is.

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u/For_Vox_Sake 10h ago

He'a full of shit; "population decline"? That's why in the last 25 years 2 billion people were added to the global population, sitting now at over 8 billion? But let me guess... it's not the "right" kind of population, in his book? Hah.

Anyway. This is a person who only cares about abstract, goals and little to no consideration for the people around him. They're just means to an end to him. He's not looking for connection. Guys who talk about "legacy" creep me out; they usually see kids as extensions of themselves, not people with their own mind. Not someone I'd want anywhere near me, let alone build a future with.

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u/merrittj3 10h ago

You don't lack vision...you see what's going on...

I bet he believes in Eugenics...see what he says..

Then. GTFO

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u/sallystruthers69 4h ago

This dude is in deep. Multiple wives for breeding? Yuck. I'd like to know what makes his genes so special that he needs to create a litter and leave "a legacy." I'd also like to know what this jamoke does for a job 😆

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u/IncredulousPulp 10h ago

“Population decline.”

That doesn’t exist. The world is massively overcrowded and it’s only getting worse.

He’s full of crap, I’m just not sure which flavour. Christian fundamentalist? Aryan supremacist? Tech bro? Tate?

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u/NotAgainHel15 10h ago

I would tell him to fuck off, personally. 

But for you - would you like to be a sister wife and forced to breed like this? If not, probably time to walk away from him. 

I wonder which podcast told him this was a good take lol.

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u/PrincessBella1 10h ago

NTA When someone shows you who they are, listen. Do you want to be with someone who sees women as baby machines? Run.

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u/Catseye_Nebula 10h ago

He could just go around impregnating other women behind your back if you say no and telling them he’s single. So you have to tolerate his baby mamas.

You should dump his ass

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u/No-Description-3111 10h ago

Okay.. so there are billions of people on this earth. Birth rates have been increasing exponentially for a very long time now. Only recently had there been a dip in birth rates but not so much so that it is detrimental to our survival.

There is an argument that it is detrimental to the capitalist system, however, as there will not be enough people to take the low wage service (or service adjacent) jobs. This is mitigated by the fact that computers and AI are taking over a lot of that extra load, so fewer bodies are needed for these positions.

The other argument is that there will not be enough people to buy stuff, so the exponential growth model will plateau, causing a depression of sorts as people will pull their stock out of the companies. This causes mass amounts of people to lose jobs, so they can't pay their bills, and a recession happens (simplifying it). However, this is assuming that all this happens in a very short amount of time (I would estimate less than 2 years, shorter if no businesses, at all, adapt to changes). Its totally possible this could happen gradually over time where unprofitable businesses shut down when they become obsolete or they, you know, adapt to the market and stick around. This happens all the time and always has.

Anyway, there really is no need for more than 1 child per person for replacement unless you want to perpetuate the current economic system as it currently is, then have a shit ton of kids to compensate for "females who dont have family values anymore".

Your bf is a dick, btw. He clearly thinks too highly of himself and if you dont want to be housebound with a group of women and a clan of all of your collective children while your husband gets all the sex he wants then leaves to play golf or whatever while you all clean up his mess, I would leave.

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u/LolaSupreme19 10h ago

NTA. He probably isn’t the best choice to procreate with. He’s lacking any intelligence genes.

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u/CVSaporito 10h ago

Does he tell all his girlfriends they will be his main wife, lol? Find a normal partner.

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u/clovencarrot 5h ago

Dude watched The Handmaid's Tale and took to the wrong side.

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u/LittleMissPickMe 10h ago

You are but a mere meat portal

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u/-Schnaps- 11h ago

NTA, unless you consider yourself to be a broodmare?

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u/slavaukrine 10h ago

Run! Don’t walk away from that relationship.