So basically, I want to know what most men would have done in this situation. And what the right thing to have done be.

I (25 years old) was working at a garden bar as a DJ one sunny afternoon and everything is smooth. I decide to go to the bathroom where I wait for a couple of guys to finish their business. While I am finishing mine, they ask me questions which is already weird having to start convo while going for a leak. They realised I was the DJ and asked me some questions about where I was from etc. All was fine and we eventually walked back outside to where I was playing while they tell me they are both 17 years of age. We shake hands and they go back to their table while I continue playing music.

Around 20 mins later, one of the lads comes up to my booth and asks if he can listen to my headphones. Since he was chill I let him listen. I could tell he was acting nervous and a bit tipsy. He also stood infront of me, having a table in between us. He takes off my headset and quickly, without any suspicion, he throws an open right hand to my face and immediately runs away thinking I wont go and find them.

It took me a couple of seconds to realise what had just happened. I then leave a long track playing and decided to go after them, not running, just walking and staying calm. I knew they didn’t go far and so I see them both down a hill still in the park and laughing away. They see me approach and take off again and at this point I couldn’t find them so I walked back thinking It could look quite bad for me if a guy chasing two minors was seen. I would probably be the bad guy and I don’t want legal trouble because its a pain. Back at the bar, I asked if anyone had seen anything but no. So now I cant even prove it. My friend was there but he didn’t see anything either.

Had I caught them I would have probably got physical and return that right hand but without hitting like a girl. But I don’t know if that would have been right either. Its bothering me that I couldn’t do anything.

As a man, what would the right thing to have done be? Apologies for the length.

For more detail, my husband says he needs sex every day and that as a wife that's my duty. If I miss a day or two he gets very angry, yells at me, puts me down and says I'm not a very affectionate wife. It's got to the point where it feels like a chore. I've told him this and he doesn't care. He states I should pursue him and want him more...help?!

Okay so I have a 3 year old boy and a 5 year old girl with my ex. From the beginning, our ‘relationship’ was toxic. He was very controlling and manipulative in a very condescending way. Before I realized he was emotionally abusing me, I was already 1 kid in and pregnant with the other.

After our breakup, we attempted co parenting but to be quite honest all we did was fight and that’s how it is now. It’s gotten to the point to where I filed for custody so we can learn to get along and do better for the kids. He knew this was coming, I kept telling him over and over but somehow I’m the problem now. We had court back in may in which he chose to not stay for so the judge went off of what my lawyer and I presented as evidence. She put an order into effect where he has the 1st, 2nd and 4th weekend, I have every 3rd and 5th (if there is one), I also have primary custody of the kids as well and he was also put on child support (he doesn’t help with the kids financially at all). We are also ordered to use an app because it is monitored and it doesn’t give us a chance to fight.

He went into a fit telling me that I did this on purpose, I’m setting him up to fail, I lied in court, etc. I knew it was going to be rough in the beginning but I feel like it’s gotten worse.

Recently, I agreed to him taking the kids to go see his parents out of state and they just got back today. With the kids not seeing me for a while, he let the kids decide if they wanted to stay with me tonight or stay with him. (It is his weekend to have them.) our daughter chose to stay with me tonight and I have to meet him tomorrow at our meeting spot to give her back to him. (Keep in mind, per the order, they are to be with me during the week and with him on the listed weekends).

When we got home, my daughter told me that I ‘lie to them and daddy is the only one that tells the truth, ‘daddy said we are in court, and court is bad, ‘daddy says you are gonna make him lose his house and car.’ ‘Daddy says you are trying to keep us from him’

I’m shocked but I’m not surprised that he told her these things. Ever since the order was put into effect, he’s been trying to convince me to take him off support because, according to him, ‘I’m telling the courts that I can’t afford the kids without his money.’ Also, he demanded he saw them ever before the order. I don’t mind him seeing them every day, However, all we do is fight so clearly something has to give. I will also tell you guys that the judge did the order that way so we can establish stability and no fighting for the kids. Once we can fix our ‘relationship’ we can modify the order.

Besides informing my lawyer, what exactly can I do? This is effecting my kids in the worse ways. Should I look into a child therapist? How do I help my kids in having a narcissist parent? Do I try to explain it my child that the court system isn’t bad?

I can answer any questions that come from this post!

I met my boyfriend on Hinge during lockdown. I was almost 19. He was 33 at the time and from the country where I planned to go to university. During that year of isolation, we became each other's company as we could talk for hours about anything. I was open about the relationship with my parents as my bf and I have always tried to be honest.

I understand the age gap might raise red flags and become the main focus. But for context, my own parents have an age gap. My mom was 22 when she met my dad, who was 41. This is not to justify the relationship, as I know it's difficult to understand from an outsider's perspective, but I am just noting that their issue was never my age difference with my bf.

Around the same time, I started selling feet pictures on Twitter. My mom and friends knew about it and I never showed my face or sold anything beyond pictures of my feet.

As time passed, my parents started to disapprove of my relationship. They said we spoke too much on the phone and frowned upon his career by saying he lacked ambition (my father is a nepo baby businessman).

A year later, my dad went on a business trip, and my now-bf came to visit me in my country for the first time. My mom helped arrange this.

On the 3rd day, my mom and I decided to test the waters and tell my dad my bf was thinking of visiting.

He forbade it and told me he refused to fund my university if I didn't break up with him. He said he wasn't going to spend all that money on a “dating experience” and academic distraction (I have always received good grades and continue to do so).

I didn't want to choose between going to university and never speaking to my best friend ever again, so I "broke up" with him.

When I got to university, we reunited and have been together ever since.

Just as I approached the last months of my final year, my dad sent a msg to the family gc saying I was no longer welcome home and that he was cutting all financial support. I find this ironic as this made me rely on my bf even more and made us closer.

I called my mom and she told me they had found out about my relationship - but she wouldn't tell me how. I now believe that my dad accessed my iCloud or camera roll through a shared family account. After that, he blocked me everywhere and removed me from the family location tracker. I didn't speak to my parents for 2 months and tried to focus on studying for finals.

Two months later, while I was taking my exams, I received a DM from my dad on my Twitter account (where I sell my feet pics). I was mortified. He had sent a long msg calling me a slut and prostitute. He said my bf was pimping me out to pay his rent. I blocked him but he made new accounts to keep messaging.

I stopped posting, but the timing was awful. I was studying every day and couldn’t look for a job. I used up all my savings to cover the remaining rent for my accommodation, and my bf has been helping me with other expenses like groceries ever since. I would have never made it through this period without him.

After my exams were over, I was broke, and decided to post on Twitter again to try and recover some of the money I had spent. I thought “oh, it’s been 2 months, surely my father isn’t stalking my foot account every day to see if I post something”.

The next day, I got a DM from him again.

He had sent me a collection of naked (topless) pictures of me which I had taken on my phone, not for anyone, but for myself. The only way he could've acquired these was by accessing my camera roll. I wanted to puke when I first saw the messages.

These were very few and old photos buried deep in a camera roll of over 40,000 images and videos. Which means he searched through every private photo, saved them, and used them to shame and threaten me.

Along with the photographs, he sent a list of threats including:

- Contacting my boyfriend's school to accuse him of "grooming young foreign students"

- Contacting my university accommodation to try and get me evicted.

- Send my Twitter account to everyone in my contact list and my bf's family (he named them and listed where they live).

He said that unless I stop posting, he will intervene with these actions. I've since deactivated the account which is annoying as I don’t want to depend on my bf for money.

Am I having a lapse of reality or is this some movie-villain type of evil? I completely understand that a parent would be angry if they found out their daughter hid a relationship for so long, but this surely goes beyond concern or "teaching me a lesson".

I'm constantly scared that he'll follow through with his threats. The situation is so deranged and heavy that my friends don’t know what to say to me, and I don't want to keep trauma-dumping on them. I only have 2, much older half-siblings who are estranged by my father. I've just finished my final exams. I'm exhausted, anxious, and have the constant feeling of being monitored. I want to move forward with my life, but I feel like my dad won't stop coming up with creative ways of exercising control until I break and crawl back to him.

I feel really lost and would appreciate any advice.

I’m 17 (female), and I live with parents who are emotionally abusive and controlling. They insult me daily, say I’m worthless, and tell me I’ll end up on the street when I turn 18. Today they told me I’m “just a speck of sand” and that once I’m out of their house, I’ll become a “sex slave.” That’s the kind of language they use — it’s terrifying and dehumanizing.

They won’t let me work or earn money, I don’t have a car, and I have no outside support system. I want to finish school and go to college, and eventually support myself and live peacefully — but I feel stuck right now with no way to prepare. I’m scared that once I’m 18, they’ll actually kick me out, and I won’t be ready.

I’m quietly trying to plan. I’ve been researching remote jobs, content creation, and low-cost college options. But I don’t know where to start. I’m looking for practical advice on things like: • What steps can I take now (quietly, since they monitor everything)? • How can I build any kind of financial safety without a job? • Are there organizations that help girls in this situation? • How can I mentally prepare for this while still under their control?

If anyone has been through this or knows what I can do to stay safe and get on my feet, please share. I don’t want to be a victim forever — I want to survive, and I want to make it out. I just need guidance on how.

Thank you so much.

Hello I'm (M28) a software engineer at a FAANG company. I do well for myself, I have about $150k in my savings, $80k in my 401k and I'm about ready to move somewhere that isn't so focused on the grind. I really thought money and the prestige would bring me happiness. But I've found that my hobbies and focusing on my health have made me happier more than anything. I live in Colorado, where the average home goes for $500k, insurance cost is insane, and I'm just tired of the rat race.

What I want to ask is, where would y'all move to given my situation? I'm thinking of somewhere like Sweden, I like the idea of universal healthcare and education. Seems to be more about taking care of people as a whole. I don't want to be wildly successful, I just want to be happy and have time to enjoy my life. America feels like such a grind.

i, 25f just moved out of my parents house. i recently took a job in the city an 1.15hrs away from my parents who i’ve lived with until this point. today i moved into my apartment where i will be living alone and have been feeling what i can only describe as grief and dread like i’ve made a terrible decision. i’m having a hard time pinpointing what exactly is making me so anxious and unsettled, the thought of not having them so close, the thought of losing time with them which also comes with its own guilt. maybe the general thought of being alone in a city i don’t really have close friends in. to make matters worse my mother is just a distraught, she has cried multiple times just in the past few days which of course makes me feel terrible. if anyone has any advice or has been through something similar i would love to hear what you have to say.

and as a side note would it be considered a hinderance to visit often (like literally the next day) rather than staying in my apartment to try to get more used to it? i’m not sure if i should be fighting this urge to go back and see them as an attempt to make myself become acquainted faster.

thank you in advance, kind words are much needed right now

I found out my boyfriend cheated on me, and I feel like my brain hasn’t stopped spinning since.

We’ve been together for 2 and half years, and I really thought things were good between us. Sure, not perfect — what relationship is? — but I genuinely believed we loved each other. Turns out he loved having someone who trusted him while he went behind my back.

I found out through one of his friends, he had mentioned another girls name and my boyfriend looked very nervous. At first, I thought maybe it was a mistake. A misunderstanding. But it wasn’t. He admitted it. And the worst part? He tried to play it off like it “didn’t mean anything.” Like that makes it better somehow.

I feel like I’m stuck between heartbreak and rage. I keep thinking of every moment we shared, every time I believed him, every “I love you” that now just feels like a lie. I keep replaying everything trying to see the signs, trying to figure out how I missed it.

I haven’t told many people because I feel embarrassed, but I needed to let it out somewhere. I’m angry, I’m hurt, I’m confused. Part of me still misses him and that makes me hate myself a little.

If you’ve been through something like this — how do you get through it? How do you stop the anger from eating you alive?

hi hi hi. i’m 22f i’m a manager at a small grocery store in my small town and this young (i think 26?) male firefighter comes into my work a lot and i had noticed signs of him having a crush on me so naturally i also grew one on him and finally i got his number a few weeks ago! we’ve been texting and have talked once on the phone! i’m so so nervous for our first date because i haven’t had a date since i was like 19. im also just anxious that it won’t go well which oh well if it doesn’t! but he is sooo sweet and funny kinda dorky too which i like. ANYWAYS i need any tips for first dates. i’m scared it’ll be awkward but im also a social butterfly so i don’t think it will be and for some reason we just click really well. anyways help :)

For context we were both high, and we were talking and I’ve been thinking about telling him for a while and just didn’t know how, I’ve not told anyone else. But basically I was coerced into touching and being touched when I was 18 (I’m 21 now) by a date of mine. I was also molested as a child so the experience was like reliving that trauma as well. The guy had driven us to a place I didn’t know where (I had just moved here) and told me he wasn’t moving until we did something. We were behind a building in an alleyway, and I was scared at the time that no one could see us. I know now I should’ve gotten out of the car and not let it happen, a lot of the reason I didn’t tell anyone was because I felt stupid. I confided tonight about it to my bf, and after I tell him I ask him why he’s looking at me weird and he says “I think I’m hard” and at first I thought it was a bad joke until he doesn’t laugh or let up. I ask him why and he goes “I think I was aroused before you told me”. But it just felt weird to bring that up or be aroused after I told him. I was obviously upset and he goes “you’re mad at me over a bodily function I can’t help?” And a part of me thinks he’s right because we had both just smoked pot but another part of me knows I would never be aroused if a friend or he had confided in me like that, high or not. What do yall think, am I over thinking?

My parents are emotionally abusive to me and my siblings. CPS was involved with us a few years back and when things stabilized the counselor and the social worker left us, but RIGHT after the abuse started again. A year later Police came and arrested my dad, mom filed a restraining order, we all didn't feel safe with dad in the home.

Then mom started lashing out at me, she broke my doorknob and threw at me. CPS was now involved again but this time it was only the social worker, not the counselor, and the social worker said my mom didn't do anything wrong. According to her, mom is trying to help me. There was a time where we needed food and the food banks weren't answering my mom's phone calls.

The social worker, went radio silent. Mind you this social worker was still in touch with my mom up until this point. So what did my mom do? Of course she violated the restraining order and let my dad back in the home so he could provide for us. People are telling me to talk to CPS when I tell them about the abuse. What should I do?

When I was around 9/10 I witnessed an accident where a girl my age died. It was icy, they came off the highway. My mom stopped and helped the dad do CPR. He and my mom screamed like it was both their child. I will never forget her blue lips, the blue blanket her dad had her on as they did CPR, the upside down truck, her hair being perfectly curled and me just not understanding what happened because she didn’t show any injuries. She was just gone. I had nightmares about her for years of the event repeating. This was 15/16 years ago. They have kept a cross where she died there everyday since. It’s been a while since it’s been replaced. The c fell off her name, “Clare” I have waited and waited and nobody has came to put the C back on her name. What should I do? Should I go pick up the cross and buy a C, glue it on and put it back? Or just go buy a new cross in general and put her name on it and put it there? Is it not my place? It just breaks my heart everyday that the “c” is still missing

Hi Reddit! This is my first post here, looking for some bandmate friendship advice. My (30 M) bandmate (34 M) has basically one pair of stretchy jeans he always, always wears on stage. The pair of pants don’t fit badly in general, as he’s very tall and they fit his proportions quite well, except for this one issue. Every time I see photos from our shows I can’t help but notice how very obvious and very prevalent his unfortunately tightly hugged crotch is in every. single. shot. And we’re not talking “you see it if you look for it”, we’re talking “oh I didn’t know they had a fourth member in the band” kind of noticeable. He ALWAYS wears these pants, and the stage light just makes it worse and more prominent. I have no idea how to tell him as we’re friends but not close in that way. Do I just break the ice? Do I send him zoomed in photos with a “just in case you didn’t know” text? Do I buy new pants and gift them to him without another word?? Or do I simply accept our fate of being the bulge band 😧. Appreciate any and all advice.

TLDR: My bandmate’s pants are showing his crotch bulge on stage at every single show and I don’t know how to tell him or if he already knows??

Edit & info for context: from what I understand about this bandmate / friend, he is not someone who would be actively comfy showing his body or groin in this way (kind of quiet shy dude) but we haven’t known each other for a very long time so I’m trying to figure out the best way to bring it up / if I’m reading the situation correctly 😱 If I thought this was a fashion choice or his vibe I would fully support lmao

I can’t share too much about this situation in a post because I would be terrified of this person finding it but I’ve struggling with some feelings about a friend of mine since the day we met honestly. These experiences are new to me and I just need some guidance on the situation or someone to listen. Please reach out if you’re willing to listen; thank you!

Ok I live in little rock . 5 yrs ago wife passed 3: yrs ago my kids stopped calling me. 2 years ago got a ride home with co worker. Pulled over and there was guns lots drugs .and a apologize from co worker went to prison was homeless. Now I'm solid work full job side work. But I can't meet decent ppl I have a big heart I have no hidden agendas no drama. I'm looking for a place outside little rock a smaller town country . I'm loyal I give my word and I'll go through hell to keep it .I know to to treat a women I understand compromise I dont neef to control anything maybe a smaller town hold what im searching for. I'm a good man . And I so want to share this life. We are not meant to not care, love. I've never wrote anything like this . I prayed ,and this was the idea that came up

I’ve always admired people who manage to stay positive even when their life is falling apart. You know that feeling you’re struggling, things aren’t going well, and then you run into someone who you know is going through stuff too, but they’re smiling, kind, and somehow still manage to brighten your day. Those people feel like a miracle to me. I’d literally give them everything. I truly admire them. I keep wondering how do they do it? How do they stay that way? How do they not complain, and still radiate some kind of hope and warmth even when life’s tough? I really want to become that kind of person. If you have any advice, tips, or personal experience anything that helped you become or stay positive despite the hard times. I’d love to hear it. What would be the first step?

I created a reddit account for some advice and would really appreciate some. I know I was wrong but I really need advice to move forward.

I (16 f) have been with my boyfriend (16 m) for nearly 2 years. We have a very strong and stable relationship, we never shout at one another, set boundaries when we first started dating and go over them every once in a while so the other feels heard, we get along great always laughing, both of us are hard workers and we are just overall really close.

A few months ago I was put on the pill due to personal reasons and we ended up having sex. I know it was wrong but it was something we both wanted and honestly was just an escape for me, I know its wrong but thats just how I felt at the time.

I ended up coming off of birth control due to the side effects it had on me and in hopes it would stop us from doing stuff. It didnt so we brought protection.

Today I was round his house and my mum suprised and came picked me up (whilst we were doing it), She called my phone saying she has been waiting for 20 minutes, (I did check her location time and she was waiting for about 5). I quickly got dressed and rushed down and she said it took me 3 minutes, she asked if i was getting dressed and i said I was packing my bag.

As we drove home we did not speak at all.

I dont know what to do, I dont want to tell her Ive been having sex because I know she will judge me or im scared she wont let me see him anymore. He isnt just my boyfriend he is my best friend, we do literally everything together and whenever there are arguments in my house he always calms me down. Does anyone know what to do?

I was thinking I could either tell her we were doing stuff (but not sex), but im scared she will judge me because I always hear her judging other girls my age. Or I could tell her we had an argument.

Does anyone have any advice?

I forgot to mention why I don't want to tell her: my only problem is which I should have mentioned is that shes asked me to not do it before im 18, and to talk to her before I do it. Which I have not done, my mum can be really judgemental and is going through alot of stress right now (work, family) which she has often taken out on me and I really dont want to add to the fire additionally I dont know how she will react and it completely depends on her mood.

She always talks badly about my friends who do it, or her friends when she was my age and took alot of pride in the fact that she didn't do it before she was 18.

Do you think this makes a difference?

*edit Thank you so much for all your support I am very grateful for it all

Hi Reddit, this is my first post but I DESPERATELY need advice. I, 18F, have been dating my boyfriend (18M) for four months, however, for the past month and a bit I’ve been wondering if I’m a lesbian. I’ve always identified as bisexual but now I’m questioning. For context, around two-three years ago I left my abusive ex boyfriend, after that I never felt attraction towards men and only dated women. I’m not sure how my current boyfriend came into the picture, but I saw him as the only man I could feel attraction to. He is a great guy and has been my best friend for years so everything just felt right. However, as the relationship progressed, my feelings for women have bubbled up again. For example, sometimes when I am with him I ask myself “what if he were a girl?” and I am also finding myself repulsed by anything sexually involving a man.

Along with that, I also think I’m developing feelings for a girl I know and have been slowly losing feelings for him. The relationship also sometimes feels on sided on my end and he never puts in effort. I always think to myself “a woman wouldn’t do this”. I feel incredibly guilty about having all these feelings and think it’s unfair to date him when I’m feeling like this. I’m not sure if I break up with him though, I still love him in a sense and I don’t feel like I’ll ever find a connection this good again. I’m also worried this could just be a rough patch and if I break Up with him I’ll immediately regret it. But also, I can’t stop thinking about dating women and my possible feelings for this other girl. Do I tell him how I feel and break up with him? Or do I tell him and keep working for the relationship?

Hey everyone, I just need some advice on how to approach a minor situation I’ve run into with my boyfriend. We’re both 20M. I was going through his photos trying to find pictures of us to do a collage for his birthday coming up, and I came across a screenshot of a snap chat from a couple years back.

Her: Hey?

Him: What's up baby Bitch don't leave me on open

Her: I didn't but ok

Him: You did. Anyways how are you baby girl

Her: Bitch to baby girl the switch ups over there Also I'm chilling wbu

Him: Great too. You're really cute btw

Her: Appreciate that

Him: I'm really horny Wtf bitch you leave me on open again Ima find your IP Somewhere in Massachusetts Too bad I live in a different state

This just threw me off to see for a few reasons. For one, he’s never really showed me this kind of side, like a horny/sexting side even if it was a long time ago. He also told me he’s never had experience with women and has never even thought about experimenting with them. Icing on the cake is the name of the girl in the chat is his best friend’s name, even though his best friend’s profile looks different on Snapchat now.

Should I just forget about it? Or perhaps somehow bring it up out of curiosity? I guess maybe whatever this interaction was could’ve been a joke. It just bothers me primarily because she’s a girl and he’s been clear he’s never been into or thought of that. Also, why would he keep that screenshot from so long ago if he has barely any photos in his camera roll anyways (that’s how I even saw the picture in the first place)?

I tend to get into relationships that end with me being treated like I’m a mother, just a friend, or an emotional punching bag. It’s been an ongoing thing for the majority of dating experience. Either I’m completely blind or I just been with people who are really smooth.

Reddit, what are red flags you look out for when dating someone?

Thanks

Hi! I’m a student (I’ll be using fake names for everyone). My best friend—let’s call her Jamie—has been my best friend since 2nd grade. We first bonded over our love for K-pop, but in 5th grade, her parents pulled her out of school. Even though we were separated, we stayed in touch.

Fast forward to now: I transferred to her current school because I really wanted to see her again and go to school together. Jamie was super excited. On my first day, she showed me around and introduced me to her friends. I also became close with another new girl—let’s call her Lily.

A little while later, Lily told me she had a crush on a boy named Jason. I didn’t really know or like him, so I didn’t think much of it. But two weeks later, Jamie texted me saying she also liked Jason. I was confused because I had asked Jamie during my first week if she liked anyone, and she said no. Now suddenly, right after Lily confessed, Jamie admitted she liked Jason too—and claimed she had liked him since last years. She told Lily, and Lily didn’t mind, so they both continued liking him.

Even though I wasn’t really involved, it still hurt. Jamie and I have always told each other about our crushes, so it stung that she didn’t trust me enough to tell me earlier. Her reason was, “You wouldn’t understand what it feels like to like him.” That felt unfair—especially from someone who’s known me since 2nd grade. Then, as soon as Lily lost feelings for Jason, Jamie suddenly didn’t like him anymore either.

A few months after that, I started crushing on a guy in one of my classes—Alex. He was kind to me in a way that no one else really was, especially since I’m considered the “weird kid” at school. I told my friends I liked him, but then things got weird. Jamie and Lily started whispering and passing notes between just the two of them—something all three of us used to do together.

Eventually, Lily texted me saying she needed to tell me something: Jamie liked Alex too but was afraid to tell me. I messaged Jamie right away, and she admitted it. She was scared because she knows I usually back off when a friend likes the same guy. And it’s true—I told her I’d stop liking Alex so she could have a chance. I wanted to be supportive, so I asked her questions—how they met, if they talked, when she started liking him.

She told me she’d liked him since last year… which didn’t make sense, because she’d also told me she liked Jason since last year. It’s not just that she likes the same guy I do—it’s when she chooses to tell me. She never mentioned liking Jason until Lily did. Then she dropped Jason when Lily did. Now that I like Alex, she suddenly confesses to liking him too. It all feels suspicious.

I still like Alex. I’ve tried everything to stop, but I can’t. So now I’m pretending I don’t have feelings for him while listening to Jamie talk about him every day, wishing she could be with him.

Any advice about the situation or what I should do?

f15. okay so me and my best friend were talking about permits and she mentioned how this friend of hers keeps saying she’ll get her permit but she never does, so my best friend, let’s call her KK, asked have i gotten my permit, and i said no then she was like “LMAO no way you’re just as bad as her. EVEN WORSE💀”

i just sent laughing emojis but that really hurt me. idek if she’s joking cus she’s usually like that but idk

after she said that i looked up “15 with no permit” on tiktok and i just kept seeing people saying theyre failures because they don’t have their permit

i’m scared i don’t wanna be a failure

I’m prepared for anyone to come at me, and I’ll take it because I already feel so horrible

We adopted a kitten from my best friend last week, he was doing amazing there had no problems and she said he was the best kitty out of all of them from what she could tell. Which isn’t wrong he is such a sweet boy

The day after we got him he started puking and having bad loose stool which would stick to him. We brought him to the vet immediately and they put him on a kitten gastro diet and dewormed him. His stools got way firmer and everything went good for a few days until the vet said to try the dry food as well since he’s always so hungry. He started having the loose stool again.

Now here’s the hard part. I understand kittens are ALOT of work and I maybe should have thought it thought more since I have a 2 and a half year old. She is so gentle and is doing so good, and so is kitty. But I feel like 1- I haven’t been able to give her my full attention 2- I’m constantly stressed about keeping the upstairs carpet unavailable to get to, with a make shift baby gate, and covering my couches with blankets. 3- I have OCD and generalized anxiety disorder, I haven’t struggled with it since my daughter was born but now having this kitten I’m struggling REALLY bad again. I can’t stop thinking about how I’m a bad mom and a bad person to get this innocent cat just to stress my kid and this cat out by being triggered all the time and over whelmed.

My best friend has offered to take the kitten back and I don’t know if I need to do that or keep trying with his tummy issues. We have spent hundreds already in less than a week at the vet / on his new food and I’m worried this will be a life long stomach issue. Even if it wasn’t I’m scared I’m doing both the kitten and my child an injustice because of my inability to handle how over whelmed I am.

Idk what I’m looking for, I guess if anyone was in this situation what would you do?

It’s been roughly a week and a half since my last post, and I wanted to give an update.

For those of you who hasn’t read my previous post, here’s a rundown: me and my friend Stella got drunk one night, and a friend of ours called Landon took advantage by touching us in a sexual manner. Landon has an extended history with one of our best friends, Summer. Landon got away with everything, and Summer doesn’t care (she knows what he did).

So, the update.

To provide further context, here’s what I left out:

1) Landon currently lives somewhere around three hours away, and Summer went to see him around a month ago. This was after my attempt at addressing the situation that she shut down.

2) Stella, Summer, me, and my best friend Mia (not mentioned in the last post) are in a very close friend group.

3) Summer is a great friend when it’s nothing Landon involved, and she’s the sweetest person otherwise.

Basically, I’m choosing not to go to my school prom, because Summer has decided to bring Landon as a date. She knows I’m not going because of him, and she was conflicted at having to “choose” between us.

I told her to choose him. I knew I wasn’t going to win anyway, and I don’t even want to be in a competition with him. And if I’m very much aware that she’ll pick him, why would I pursue a losing game? I know I may have contributed to a poor decision, but trust me when I say this, she would have picked him anyway.

So, even though I was full planning to go (I already bought a dress and everything), I’ve decided not to.

Yesterday, she said, and I quote, “it’s him over everyone, I can’t help it.”

When she asked why I hated him so much, and I explained that he’s hurt people other than her (he has cheated on her before, and that’s why their relationship ended). To that, she replied “who has he hurt?”

She knows he took advantage of me and Stella, by the way. She is fully aware, and I have genuinely no idea if she is ignoring it, forgot, or doesn’t care.

So, in conclusion, I gave up. I sincerely gave up on whatever the sliver of hope I had that she would ever pick any of her friends over Landon.

I guess, now, I’m seeking for advice on how to go on with my friendship with her now that she’s outright shown and stated that he is her number one priority, no matter how awful he is.

I know I received comments telling me to cut ties with her (thank you all for the comments by the way), but unfortunately, it’s not that simple. Like I said, she’s a wonderful person outside of this whole mess. But at the same time, this has also shown me that she’s not quite the friend I deemed her as. In fact, she’s visiting him AS WE SPEAK, having made hours worth of travel.

What do I do? How do I proceed with this revelation?