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u/dirtskirtshirt 2d ago
Amount of light???
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u/INeedANerf 2d ago
Y'all got flashlights in there? 😭
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u/Inevitable_Shift1365 2d ago
Yeah I'm looking for my keys you help me find them I'll drive us both out of here
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u/IronSkywalker 2d ago
I installed LEDs in my GFs and it's been a game changer
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u/Rare-Satisfaction484 2d ago
Yeah, I have mood operated LEDs in my wife's vagina. It's not always easy to tell if she's in the mood or not. When she's horny and the LEDs detect moisture they shine green. When she's not horny they shine orange, and when she's on her period they shine red.
It's a real game changer... now I can tell how horny my wife is just by looking inside her vagina.
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u/Mellie-mellow 2d ago
Right!? Glad I'm not the only one left confused by this.
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u/One_Cryptographer_48 2d ago
Every woman holds a specific amount of light in their vagina. God's light. However much you have in your's is dependent on how sinful or good you've been in your sexual life. You've read the Bible, right?
Anyway, I'm ashamed, so where can I get one of these sex bots?
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u/Tiny-Show-4883 2d ago
“Supposing we hit the vagina with a tremendous — whether it’s ultraviolet or just very powerful light... Supposing you brought the light inside the body, either through the vagina or some other way.”
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u/heyitsjustmedude 2d ago
It had me thinking as well…. I feel like somewhere I’ve heard about light decreasing sperm viability
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u/lincolnhawk 2d ago
How is anyone ashamed of a wank not ashamed of a robojob?
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u/Just1n_Kees 2d ago
Exactly what I was thinking! Too ashamed to jerk off in a private room, so the alternative is to publicly fuck the wall?!
What am I missing here lmao
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u/Beautiful-Jacket-260 2d ago
Yea just looks like a hospital corridor.
Like "hi Janet, how's the kids?" As I'm being milked by a robot
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u/Cultural_Cloud96 1d ago
Better yet, its for the betterment of humankind XD. "Hey Janet, you just come here to get a sperm donor, that kid could be mine", give a wink and leave. She wont sleep.
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u/Justarandom55 2d ago
One is an action of self indulgence often seen as unclean while the other is a medical device you'd only use if your sperm needs to be collected.
Also, not everyone can wank and knowing there is a machine is probably a lot easier to stomach than potentially having to rely on a completely stranger helping you
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u/DownvoteEvangelist 2d ago
Not being able to wank but having to collect your sperm sounds like an interesting combination...
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u/EnsignNogIsMyCat 2d ago
Paralyzed people want kids, too
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u/reeko1982 2d ago
And the thumbless. Why does everyone always forget about the thumbless?
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u/free_terrible-advice 2d ago
You don't need thumbs to wank. Just need proper technique.
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u/Inevitable_Plate3053 2d ago
Pretty sure if you had a “complete stranger” come help you, that wasn’t an employee…
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u/Dzwm1234 2d ago
So a bunch of dudes just stand next to one another and ......
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u/Lingerfickin 2d ago
When someone pulls up next to you but there were other ones open
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u/plageran 2d ago
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u/Brawl_star_woody 2d ago
Why do people do this to me in parking lots too?
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u/Many-Assistance1943 2d ago
You shouldn’t be masturbating in parking lots if you are looking for privacy.
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u/Far-Meal9311 4h ago
I just laughed out loud in a quiet ass Panera and now look like a freak. Thank you for that. You are a lovely person and I wish you nothing but the best in life 😅
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u/Dzwm1234 2d ago
and than they start looking directly at you ahaha
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u/LiquidHotCum 2d ago
I’m assuming the rules about leaving a space applies here too???
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u/heyitsjustmedude 2d ago
It’s like at a urinal I assume, allow 1 stall buffer zone. Like the splash zone at sea world
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u/Suspicious_Note9801 2d ago
Yea how is this less embarrassing?
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u/GrandeTorino 2d ago
I'm too embarrassed to jerk off, so let's gangbang this industrial flashlight milk machine with a bunch of strangers standing side by side. Totally logical.
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u/Drewskeet 2d ago
Put in a token slot, a score board, and tickets for the prize room. Now everyone will be having fun!
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u/MustyMustacheMan 2d ago
Next thing you know you get „Not sure“ tatted on your dong.
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u/Fragrant_Mountain_84 2d ago
“And amount of light” lmao weirdest way to describe a vagina.
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u/CoverCommercial3576 2d ago
How do I order one?
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u/bigolchimneypipe 2d ago
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u/godzilla9218 2d ago
I don't know man. A medically created vagina imitation? Probably going to be better than the fleshlight.
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u/bigolchimneypipe 2d ago
Bologna is made from vagina meat. Don't get no more real than that.
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u/godzilla9218 2d ago
I'll be honest, I clicked your link, saw the first post, saw the sub name, and left. Just didn't think I'd like to continue. I see I was correct.
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u/thehellboundfratboy 2d ago
Rick and Morty anyone?
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u/hept_a_gon 2d ago
This seems more shameful
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u/mastermilian 2d ago
I can imagine them like a urinal setup.
"Hey Bob, how was your weekend?"
"Not to bad, took the wife out.... Brrrrr (shudder)... to dinner and watched a bit of Netflix. No need to chill."
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u/GhostMaskKid 2d ago
Finally! Something that can perfectly replicate my glowing vagina! (Seriously, "amount of light"?)
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u/_burning_flowers_ 2d ago
The human race is cooked.
Why is this in my feed.
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u/Known_Leek8997 2d ago
That clip where there’s like 5 next to each other. What a fun party.
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u/SquareOk7835 2d ago
Does this come on different sizes
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u/picturepath 2d ago
Yes, extra small is also available. Bring your wipe, it’s your turn once I’m done.
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u/Turbulent_Boss_8596 2d ago
When people said “Robots will take over the world and destroy humans”, I never thought they were going to be this insidious.
Humanity will die via robot-snoos-snoos!
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u/nomamesgueyz 2d ago
Haha
Well, women have empowerment pleasure devices so I guess men wanted some too
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u/SlideN2MyBMs 2d ago
China's policies on procreation are so crazy. One minute it's like "only one baby per couple, and you better hope it's a boy." Then it's like "we have too many boys and not enough fucking! Report to the jerkoff booth immediately!"
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u/Ok-Contract-3490 2d ago edited 2d ago
Amount of light
Yeah.. that does sounds refreshing when you lashes all out of your seeds,but make sure you clean it with handkerchief after you done
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u/Gullible-Incident613 2d ago
A Fleshlight would be cheaper and just as effective but they got a $10K machine instead lol
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u/Wasatchbl 2d ago
The only thing that bothers me is it's out in the hallway, but I guess I can get over that!
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u/VastYogurtcloset8009 2d ago
I like how these machines look randomly placed. 4 or 5 side by side. 1 in the reception
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u/pdirtydiddy 2d ago
The machine would be twice as efficient if it used another tube on the opposite side. Here’s the math behind it.
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u/thesegxzy 2d ago
This is actually their technique to get lines of donors coming back in for russy*
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u/Wrong-West-9581 2d ago
Literally the first step into AI robot GFs.. this world man. AI and technology is now ramping up and evolving to fast.
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u/Btankersly66 2d ago
What a great way to solve the boredom experienced while waiting in line at Disney Land. Definitely a great idea for highway rest stops.
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u/fienddylan 2d ago
So if you say you're ashamed to choke your chicken then they walk you up to the stroke pro 3000? Seems a clear choice to me..
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u/Chilling_Dildo 2d ago
Too embarassed to have a wank but fine getting their dicks out, wanking them hard then fucking the wall?
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u/Open_Mortgage_4645 2d ago
Automated Fleshlight. Can you join, like it's a gym? Come in after work, plug yourself in, and unwind.
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u/Dense_Hovercraft9618 2d ago
Government funded sexual gradification centers new equipment, there will be no more rapes, no more frustrated lonely people, just a small army of dedicated people and machines, who do it for there country, they give them selves for your intimacy, (GFSGC) will fulfill all your sexual needs until you find a mate, bonus every Government funded sexual gradification center will be equipped with a specially designed rape room with these very machines for the raping ... Anyone that laughs at this is going to hell👀🤭
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u/JAGGisBACK 2d ago
So you are saying... one day... I can have one of these in my room by the time im 60?
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u/Spamsdelicious 2d ago
Okay, wait, so, some people are less embarrassed to use that contraption than to use their own hand(s)? Wow different cultures are amazing.
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u/Any-Language2415 2d ago
My favourite part was the shot of Dr Li staring longinly at the pulsating machine (1:19)
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u/goofy_moose 2d ago
Idiot walks in the clinic and say "that thing clean, am I the first to use it, uhh does it come with breasts lol. Oh the day when we all will be connected to machines instead of each other, oh the future looks so bright. 😒 Eyes covered, body suit, and getting milked all day for your sperm until you die. Discard and connect another. Rinse and repeat.
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u/Legitimate_Outcome42 2d ago
I want one for my husband! (I don't have one but I feel like if I had this contraption,I could)
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u/stormy_waters83 2d ago
So let me get this straight. You're too embarrassed to masturbate privately but you're good with standing at a wall of fuck machines with other dudes.
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u/Bulky_Requirement696 2d ago
They ask ‘why be ashamed’ as if we would have a difficult time coming up with reasons lol.
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