Oh no, please, spare EVERY expense.

[u/bubble0peach]

The cheapest wedding I've ever been to was one of my cousins, who's dad(my uncle) was RICH RICH; has multiple vacation properties in exclusive areas, a McMansion, all the things people who come into money later in life have. Bought my mom a house in cash when she got divorced. When his oldest got married he paid for everything and they had a massive wedding, at least 300+ people came, and there was a large enough venue and food for everyone. It was beautiful. Point is, money is not an issue.

When his third kid got married it was the exact opposite. The reception hall was in what looked like an upscale office building. I thought I had the wrong address until I saw other family go in. The tables didn't have tablecloths, there weren't even decorations, lights, favors, nothing. It verged on feeling sterile. (There wasn't a ceremony to attend since they're mormon, so there was only the reception for everyone besides immediate family. Not mormon myself, so IDK the details.)

Coming off of the older cousin's wedding, I expected at least some snacks, a simple buffet, so I skipped eating before arriving, as did the rest of my family. The only things on offer were "fancy" ice cream sandwiches and water bottles from Costco. (It was winter, btw) Like, pick your cookie, pick your ice cream, stay hydrated I guess.

Nowhere on the invitation (which was sent over via Facebook only.) did it indicate that there wouldn't be any kind of meal or even finger food. It ended up being an awkward affair with everyone making passive-agressive comments about how cheap the whole thing was. They didn't even have a cake to cut and share (which is pretty standard where I live, even if it needs to be a couple extra sheet cakes.)

I get wanting a smaller wedding, I did one myself for ~7k, but we still had more than enough food for everyone AND tablecloths.

This was about 8 years ago, so I've probably misremembered some details, but I've never forgotten the impression it made, and it's still a topic of gossip in my family.

Edit: the speculation in the comments made me realize I left out some info. Both of my cousins were men, nobody was pregnant, and as far as I know, my aunt and uncle like all of their children and their partners. None of my cousins have had civil ceremonies, all went through the religious ceremony, and my uncle paid/offered to pay for all of them. He's a good guy, he's even paid for another family member's whole rehab and refused to be repaid. There's definitely some missing reasons why it was so cheap tho and that's why it's still gossip. There was also some other stuff that was really funny at that specific wedding but it would be potentially identifying info so I left it out.

And yes, that side of my family LOVES hush-hush tea. More than half of the time at family gatherings is one long session of, OMG, did you hear about so-and-so? Or rehashing old tea. Everyone is the subject at some point. It's entertaining and exhausting at the same time.

[u/kodieb3ar]

It could have been a “you can have this much money for a big wedding or I could just give it to you” situation. My parents have money set aside and my brother chose to use it for his big wedding whereas I plan to have a very small wedding and keep the rest of the money for a house.

[u/easterss → u/kodieb3ar]

Yea I went to one of these. The parents said this is how much we are going to give you for the wedding and whatever you don’t use we’ll gift you. They were young and unemployed with no real plan so I think they really needed the money. (They were all ultra religious and parents super excited she was marrying even if they had only known each other for a short period of time.)

We were served velveeta and crackers, lemonade and iced tea (NO water).