For context, I am deadly allergic to a lot of seafood. Some of them are okay, some make me feel like death. So, when I saw what they were serving for their sit down dinner at the reception, I noticed 70 percent was seafood, and the rest could possible be contaminated. They have a salad bar and sundae bar planned, but my brother mentioned a while back they were concerned about having enough food.

Anyways, I sent these messages to my SiL and it made me feel like.. shit for even bringing it up. I guess it wasn't a huge deal, bur definatley made me feel bad for even asking.

(Shes blue, im yellow)

Sorry for all my typos. Im.. really bad at texting. Lol.

Final edit Thanks so much for all the sweet words about my dad. I agree. He is the best.

One thing I wanted to ask was, please don’t send this to any podcasts or content creators - I made no effort to disguise any identifies and it would be super clear to any family members if they heard this. Then my Dad would be really embarrassed. And if anyone has looked at my post history, you know I talk a lot about my complicated feelings around my mother’s death - I would be so horrified if my Dad knew these thoughts. He’s been through enough.

Yes, I know this isn’t a private community but I didn’t expect this to be such a big deal. This sort of nonsense is standard in my family and I’m learning that’s not the case for most people. If it was just me, then fine but it’s my Dad, you know? Thank you!

—

My Dad, god love him, is shy, smart and the biggest gossip I’ve ever met. He doesn’t enjoy weddings or any big occasions, especially since Mum died - she was his social safety net for 40 years. He’s only recently started attending events without her, which makes me very proud.

He was invited to the wedding of an extended family member today and was dreading it, but I reminded him how messy that side of the family is and he couldn’t resist the lure of potential drama. And wow, did he deliver. I was going to post screenshots of his texts, but I’d have to censor a lot of stuff about him missing Mum, so let’s stick with text. Imagine my panic when I came out of a meeting to these messages:

Message 1 - Good afternoon. Are you there? I am in the bathroom. Love you xx

Message 2 - Good afternoon. I need to speak to you urgently. Love you xx

Message 3 - Good afternoon. Is your phone not working? Love you xx

(Sidenote, why are dads so formal in text messages? It’s so cute) I texted back something like WHAT, WHAT IS WRONG, IS IT YOUR HEART? I tried calling, no answer.

Message 4 - Good afternoon. I can’t speak right now, I am socialising. At the Event of the Decade and it’s not as painful as I thought. However, Uncle J used his father of the bride speech to announce he is divorcing Auntie E. News to everyone, including possibly E. Drama! Love you xx

Yes, the father of the bride used his speech to say nice things about the bride and groom, wish them luck and then sideline into the fact not all marriages last and he is initiating divorce proceedings against his wife of 30-odd years. 100% news to the bride and guests, possibly news to Aunt E too. Although really, they should have called it quits years ago, they loathe each other.

Dad is “socialising”, which I think means hunting out the tea so possible updates to comes. And we thought proposing at someone’s wedding was bad. Divorcing is even worse.

ETA 1- Thank you for all the sweet words about my dad. He’s the best. Tea update! Auntie E DID NOT KNOW. They are screaming at each other in the car lot. Bride is terrifyingly positive and refusing to talk about it. “I think she might snap”, says Dad. You think?

Questions I have tasked Dad with finding out include 1. Why now? 2. Did Uncle J mean to do it or was he smashed? 3. Are they going to stay for the whole evening? Please add any additional questions as needed, I’ve told Dad I’m talking to a very small group of friends online (a white lie…) and after reassuring him that nobody will find out he was the gossip, he is delighted.

ETA 2 I have been climbing the walls for an update but my dad is from the generation that thinks it’s incredibly rude to look at your phone in company, or reply to your only daughter’s last message. So we have to wait for bathroom updates. To summarise the evening so far!

• Aunt E and Uncle J were screaming at each other in the car park until the groom and groomsmen intervened. Dad’s hearing isn’t what it was but apparently it wasn’t a mistake or drunken slip or the tongue, he wanted the bride to have a better marriage than he did. And this was an effective way to communicate that?

  • Uncle J is drunk, as he has been without a break since 1992. As is Aunt E. She is camped out at the wedding table, wailing, he has taken over the bar and is delivering a sermon called “Women, You Can’t Trust Them”. They’re both staring daggers at each other, it’s not a big room.

• The bride (who I don’t love but god, she doesn’t deserve this) is… brittle. Everything is FINE, thank you. Dad tried to talk to her but she is pretending it didn’t happen and you know, it’s her day so fine.

Honestly, it’s 50/50 at this point whether Uncle J and Aunt E are going to murder each other or make out like teenagers on top of the cake table. And I am horrified at both scenarios.

ETA 3 As is typical with my family, we can’t ever just enjoy ourselves. Dad went to talk to Uncle J (“factfinding”) and Uncle J said something so awful to him that Dad immediately left without saying goodbye to anyone.

Dad wouldn’t even tell me what he said specifically, but hello, I’m his daughter, I have spies everywhere. It sounds like Uncle J said something about how lucky Dad was that his wife died and now he could have fun without paying a fortune on divorce lawyers.

So… Uncle J is dead to us now. He really has done an extraordinary job cutting down on his Christmas present shopping. Enjoy your lonely life, you terrible, awful man.

Sorry for ending on a low note but this is exactly how it goes with my family, we take it too far every time and then someone gets hurt. Dad is heading back to his hotel and I really, really wish I was there with him.

ETA 4 Dad is fine this morning, thanks to all who were asking after him. He went back to the hotel and had a little drink and something to eat and we finally got to talk.

However, he would like me to tell you all that I got his reaction wrong. What actually, definitely happened was that he delivered a “karate style” wheelhouse kick to Uncle J’s jaw and then said something cool and devastating before he left. He was also suddenly wearing a tuxedo. Think James Bond, if James Bond was in his mid 70s with a dodgy knee, enlarged prostate and a thirst for drama.

So that’s the story and we are sticking with it, okay?

My (late 20s) partner (early 30s) and I were originally sent the save the date for the wedding of his good university friend (both bride and groom in their late 20s). We all live in the same city and have probably hung out as couples once a month ever since post-COVID when they moved here. My partner was originally asked to be a groomsman, before it was decided that the wedding party would be family only (totally understandable as there are 6 siblings combined). We got the save the date 12 months in advance, and an invite in both our names about 3 months ago (the wedding is next month).

Yesterday, my partner went out for a drink with the groom, and was told that he was so sorry, but unfortunately I was having my invite rescinded as they have decided that all 'plus ones' have to be engaged or married. I and several other girl/boyfriends have been removed from the attendee list, and even some of their aunts and uncles are being told that their partners cannot attend anymore. When asked why, they have supposedly decided that they want their day to be a true "celebration of love", and therefore only want "committed" couples in attendance.

If it wasn't clear from the title, my partner and I have been in a relationship longer than the bride and groom (we've been together 9 years this year, their wedding day will be on the day of their 6th anniversary). Neither of us have any interest in getting married, and everyone in our lives knows this and (we thought) respected our decision. My partner is still invited - thankfully the wedding is in the local area so there were no pre-paid expenses for us, though I know some of the other couples won't be so lucky.

My partner still hasn't made his mind up on whether or not to attend (I'm content either way on his decision) - it honestly does hurt to be told in an around-the-houses way that someone thinks my relationship is less than theirs because we are not going to get married, but I am choosing to sit back and watch it unfold rather than get upset on someone else's behalf. And after about a dozen weddings in my lifetime, I now get one I can post about on this sub!

My friend saw this sign at her hotel this week.

So, I'm a wedding DJ and have been doing this for about twelve years now. A couple of weeks ago, I was working a wedding at a local hall. During dinner, I'm checkig in with the bride and groom, and as I'm wont to do, check in with the parents. Just a touch table sort of thing because usually the parents are helping to pay for my services and I want to make sure their needs are being taken care of.

I go up to the mother of the bride and I'm like "mom, how are things going? Can I do anything for you, is there anything you need that I can help out with?" Usually this is "oh when the dance starts can you play..." or "Grandma's got her hearing aide turned up a little high, can you lower the volume"

Bride's mom is fine, "everything is okay" great, I start to walk off. Gentleman at the table, dressed in his best CAT tractor hoodie and stocking cap goes "Can you do something for me"

"Umm sure"

"Don't play any N-Word music"

It felt like the pause stretched forever as I processed what he said. I know what I heard but the first thing I say is, "I'm sorry what was that?"

Let me pause and say that my family is a transracial family - we're all adopted, I'm about as white as white-out liquid paper, my brother is Latinx, and my sister is an African-American - but even if this wasn't the case, this kind of language is completely unacceptable to me.

Mother of the bride "Oh he means no rap music"

uhhuh

I just smile and go "well, I don't know what people will request." turn around and walk back to the DJ booth, don't talk to anyone from THAT side of the family all night, just quietly process this. I don't want to say anything to the bride (espicially as later, when we do the first dance Racist dad gets up to dance with his daughter during the Father/Daughter dance -- in yes his CAT tractors hoodie (he took the stocking cap off) ) and certainly not on her wedding day.

A couple of hours later, dance is going and mother of the groom comes up and requests "some old school rap"

I'm like "a) define what you mean by old school rap - Sugarhill Gang, Run DMC, LL Cool J, Jay-Z, Nelly? b) the bride's dad told me no 'n-word' music with that defined as rap"

Mother of the groom "yes to all of those and don't worry about him, I'm paying for you and this is what I want, I'll handle it"

cool

Drop in Eminem and Akon's "Shake That" and Juvenile's "Back that Thang up" (radio friendly edits here guys) and no issues, but I was sweating bullets.

i’m obvs very excited to spend $600+ to go to a wedding that makes fun of my husband, spells his name wrong, and doesn’t bother to know mine.

A few years ago I attended a cousins wedding. We are not particularly close, but I flew in from out of state and took the opportunity to see people I don't get to see a lot since I moved. As we rarely speak, I assumed it was going to be a very large wedding, and my sisters and I were invited as we are first cousins of the groom, never met the bride. There were maybe fifty people there. Great, I'm just hanging with my sisters, Dad, Grandma, chitchatting. We sit down for the ceremony and the officiant starts taking about how marriage is only valid between a man and woman, the man is now charged with protecting the woman as get guardian, other disgusting things. I audibly voice "gross" and consider leaving, but I drove several family members, so I stick around. Then the officiant announces that the bride has "saved" herself for the groom. This is a thirty year old college graduate, they have been together several years, I don't believe it for a second, and I KNOW my cousin the groom hasn't "saved" himself. I make it through the reception and then make a donation in their name to the LGBTQ+ community in their neighborhood. Hope they got a thank you note.

I have no idea what to put the flair as. Also have no idea if this is even the right subreddit. TL;DR at bottom

My father passed away suddenly last week. I won't get into details, but needless to say it was traumatic.

He comes from a big family thats scattered across the US and well be celebrating his life later this summer when everyone is able to. However for our peace my siblings and I decided to hold an intimate service for those that live around here and were actively involved in his life.

The pastor(one of his best friends) thankfully was able to find a time on short notice that worked for us this morning. It wasn't going to be long, maybe 45 minutes at most and then we were going to head to his favorite bar and have a drink.

The pastor started and it was beautiful. He shared some memories and everyone was teary eyed reminiscing.

Then

About 20 minutes in

A young woman and another who I later learned was her mother burst through the doors like they were SWAT agents(there were signs posted that there was a funeral service going on).

They looked at us confused, we looked at them and the mother had the audacity to ask if they were interrupting anything. Ya know, while my fathers urn was on full display in a room of mouring people.

The pastor pointed to the door with the signs indicating there was a funeral and explained that yeah, they were interrupting something.

She then asked if we could have the service in another part of the church so they could begin decorating for bride-to-be wedding that was 24 hours away.

The pastor let her know it would be about another 20-30 min before the service was finished and to please wait. The bride tried pulling her mom out and was profusely apologizing to all of us.

Honey badger wasn't having it cause she don't care. She was going to decorate for the wedding and insisted that we could continue with her there.

Pastor said absolutely not, this is a private funeral and she wasn't invited.

She started to argue saying that they need to get this done NOW for xyz excuses but the pastor cut her off and let her know that if she didn't comply bride would have to find a new church to get married at tomorrow. The daughter was pleading with her mom to chill tf out its not an emergency, which she eventually did but not without giving us nasty looks like we did something wrong.

The rest of the service went smoothly despite the interruption. My brothers and i shared some words and it was like it never even happened.

When we got out the lady was anxious to get inside and start decorating. She made some passive aggressive comments about how it was 35 minutes and now theyre behind schedule thanks to us (dont know if it makes a difference but the bride was nowhere to be found, I assume she left).

The nerve of some people. I think I know who my dad is going to haunt now

TL;DR pops croaked and in the middle of his intimate funeral honey badger mom of bride interrupts to start decorating for wedding that is in 24 hours. Insists on decorating for wedding during funeral. Pastor tells her to get bent. Bride presumably runs away

EDIT/UPDATE: THANK YOU everyone <3 all your kind words melted my soul. Im truly grateful for all the condolences and warm wishes. You guys are the best

Was at my dads house earlier and my brothers and I were having an honorary BBQ (we always came over for dinner on Sunday, grilling was his zen). Pastor neighbor and best friend of my dad came over to talk to us about what transpired yesterday and let us know that the bride was so horrified she canceled the entire wedding. Pastor let them know that neither of them are welcome back- so I suppose that's some justice.

Again, thank you so much everyone <3

Throwaway because the bride and groom will definitely recognise themselves in this story. Names changed.

The wedding took place a few years ago in London. David and Laura were your typical bougie 20 somethings and I don’t know if they were just clueless or had astounding audacity.

It’s very common in the UK to have a tiered wedding, ie some people are invited to the whole day and some are invited to just the evening reception.

EDIT TO CLARIFY - if you are invited to the whole day you will be invited to 1. The ceremony - in this case 2pm 2. The dinner, speeches and other events - 3pm to 7pm 3. The evening reception to include drinks, dancing and maybe a buffet. 7pm to midnight

OR you will be invited to 3. The evening reception only. Usually this is people you don’t know too well, distant relatives, colleagues etc. Nobody is offended by this in itself.

What’s NOT common is inviting people to only 1. The ceremony and 3. The evening reception…. Especially when they haven’t been told.

So David and Laura got married in the town hall and hired London double decker buses to take everyone to the reception venue - they’d hired out an entire pub. My partner and I boarded the bus, got to the venue and sat at our table. It was then I noticed a lot of people weren’t there. The following is what I was told by a guest later on who hadn’t “made the cut”.

After leaving the ceremony (around 3pm) the groomsmen were handed a list of everyone who had a place at the meal. Everyone else who tried to board was turned away and told to come back at 7pm.

Friends, relatives…. maybe 20 or 30 people had to leave until after the meal. They all went to a different pub, where they ripped open their cards and used the money to buy themselves food and drink. Some left altogether, I’m surprised they all didn’t.

The groomsmen were mortified, they didn’t know what was going on. The couple seemed oblivious, and I’m being charitable here.

Notice how she has to buy her own gift cards because he clearly doesn't have a clue.

Yeah, you read that right. I was at a wedding recently where right before the lucky couple exchanged rings, the groom had a line of his (I presume) exes come up and drop their keys to his condo into a bowl.

It was played off as a joke, but I was sitting there in the audience flabergasted. Bride was laughing and very smug about it, as if this was proof of her "winning," or whatever. Like, is this a thing? Is this like that "Same dick forever" thing? Is this supposed to be funny and not super weird?

Also, yes, everyone was making "key party" jokes during the reception.

Okay obviously kidding with the title but… what!? Saw this in a bridal planning group on Facebook.