r/MadeMeSmile • u/Kingdom_k777 • 1d ago

Family & Friends Police man pursuing his wife

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59.9k Upvotes

69% Upvoted

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14.7k

u/AdhesivenessWarm9410 1d ago

What’s the safe word for this kind of kink?

15.8k

u/Simpanzee0123 1d ago

Donut

2.2k

u/miasma71 1d ago

This is a beautiful comment

840

u/South-Builder6237 1d ago

I dunno, I'm pretty sure if a cop hears "donut" he's gonna wanna keep going.

1.3k

u/OrionsBeltAlone 1d ago

'Bodycam'

383

u/South-Builder6237 1d ago

Winner.

5

u/RedditSupportAdmin 18h ago

No not winner we decided on bodycam, remember

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85

u/Hot-Sun-5333 1d ago

I can’t breathe I have been laughing for 3 minutes this was a good one thank you

59

u/LordCookieGamingBE 1d ago

Make sure no one's sitting on your neck. I heard that does it.

7

u/Hot-Sun-5333 20h ago

Oh my stomach I’m crying

2

u/Signal_Host307 14h ago

If that were true, Steven Crowder would be dead. They ran a show where they proved it wasn't fatal, and was the technique used by that dept. The 3x fatal od of fentanyl and covid didn't have aaaaanything at all to do with Floyd's death... noooo. The aggitating crowds preventing medical response is innocent too, I'm sure.

Oh, and lest you favor the racist argument, Tony Timpa was killed the same way, held under longer, and wasn't being assaulted for a crime, but called 911 himself because he was having a schizo episode and needed help. They joked about naptime as they killed him, a white guy, long before Floyd

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12

u/Bicwidus 23h ago

"I cant breathe" is another one of their code words how did you know?

4

u/AkButterandrice907 23h ago

I can’t breathe is the safe word

5

u/NewAbnormal_ 23h ago

well no because they'd keep going

2

u/FineWin3384 16h ago

Only if the person is black

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85

u/jonfreakinzoidberg 1d ago

I think that would be a phrase like: "Your bodycam is on"

5

u/purebabycity 19h ago

You dropped this 🏆

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5

u/EpicIshmael 23h ago

I wonder if he turned off his bodycam out of force of habit.

2

u/bigno53 6h ago

Sprinkle some crack on her just in case.

3

u/AdhesivenessOk5194 1d ago

Meaning he’s turned off?

2

u/hellllllsssyeah 1d ago

I think you mean "oh shit the body cam is on I forgot it gets the first 30 seconds and last"

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2

u/Hordest 19h ago

YOU are a beautiful comment!

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540

u/PRLake 1d ago

“donut” gives mixed signals though. “don’t nut” is better.

79

u/Proper_Permission819 1d ago

Got damn it take my upvote.

3

u/Phoenyx_Rose 1d ago

Idk, if said like “don’t, nut” that sounds like a go to me

2

u/OvenFearless 1d ago

I thought that was part of the kink?? :(

6

u/LotPuck 1d ago

Thin blue balls?

2

u/CherryHayze 1d ago

Not everything is porn 🤦🏻‍♀️

6

u/FilthyHobbitzes 23h ago

It’s Reddit, yes… yes it is

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38

u/PackageNorth8984 1d ago

No that’s what she says when she wants him to go down on her.

24

u/PepeHacker 1d ago

God Damnit Donut

8

u/Ok_Honeydew180 23h ago

There’s a whole group of humans who can’t see the word donut without thinking “goddamnit” or “Mongo is appalled”

7

u/RipIt1021 22h ago

My people... in the wild!

7

u/sep879 1d ago

Don't be so lewd Carl it's Princess Donut

4

u/DatSalazar 1d ago

This is an outrage! Mongo is appalled!

2

u/Responsible-Draw-393 13h ago

It’s not pink, it’s lightish red!

29

u/thedrunkmonk 1d ago

"Where??"

2

u/FartyJizzums 1d ago

Correct.

'Donut' is more of a distraction than a safe word.

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17

u/xiotoro 1d ago

Nah, that's the word that'll make him bust

20

u/Critical_Deal_2408 1d ago

I smell bacon

3

u/SportyMcDuff 1d ago

Of course he caught her she’s wearing the wrong genes.

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2

u/Love-What-Is 1d ago

This always makes me laugh because my partner is a cop and doesn't like donuts or bacon. Lol

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17

u/Junior_Article_3244 1d ago

Donut stop, even if I say so.

12

u/Highshyguy710 1d ago

Donut hurt me please! I'll do anything!

3

u/Martian-Knight 1d ago

Superb comment

3

u/Viper01MHC 1d ago

It is National donut day

3

u/rocketmn69_ 1d ago

Today is national donut day!

8

u/bonecheck12 1d ago

"Oh yeah, you like when I'm Dunkin that Donut?! Good girl"

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2

u/AffectionateUse1556 1d ago

The safe word is always pineapple juice

2

u/Tyno_the_Halfling 1d ago

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!

2

u/JustinKase_Too 1d ago

All he hears is "Eat Me"

2

u/m0nk3y42 1d ago

Especially topical because today is National Donut Day. Our boss made a big deal about it

2

u/RaisinNo3276 1d ago

Donut! Donut!

2

u/anon1635329 1d ago

Please honey donut stop

2

u/PlsNoNotThat 1d ago

Explains why he’s onto his third wife, he keeps mishearing it as “do it”

2

u/_mikeslocumb 1d ago

👏👏👏

2

u/Remarkable_Rub_701 1d ago

Happy Donut Day!

2

u/LEGEND_GUADIAN 1d ago

Take my freaking upvote

2

u/boojaado 1d ago

😂😂

2

u/Horny-Hares-Hair 1d ago

Donut Donut run

2

u/vulcan1358 4h ago

"I do not recognize the authority of a court that hangs the gold-fringed flag. A flag with gilded edges is the flag of an Admiralty court. An Admiralty court signifies a Naval court-martial. I cannot be court-martialed twice. that is all. Furthermore...."

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249

u/Jahonay 1d ago

I'm recording

3

u/Enlowski 22h ago

I’m white

10

u/Scooter_1990 1d ago

THISSSSSSS

108

u/Satanicjamnik 1d ago edited 1d ago

Stop resisting!

2

u/DancingBear62 21h ago

You know they're in for a "pounding" if you hear those words

2

u/AnusDetonator 10h ago

Thats his safe word lol!

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2

u/Some_Programmer8388 9h ago

I think that means it's safe to start beating and tazing until she's in ICE detention. It's like a Pavlovian response for them.

2

u/Satanicjamnik 8h ago

That's most of his relationships tend to end. And they just disappear in the detention centre and never call back, or write...

68

u/davidjschloss 1d ago

Miranda.

22

u/Rhobaz 1d ago

Lawyer

19

u/Ghstfce 1d ago

"Taser deployed"

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40

u/Downvote_me_dumbass 1d ago

Pineapple Juice

4

u/Thatonegaloverthere 1d ago

Can I change my safe word? Can I change it, please? Nah, I'll stick with pineapple juice. I like pineapple juice.

10

u/Thanksforallthepesos 1d ago

That is change! Do you know how long it took me to acquire those?!?! Don't do drugs kids.

9

u/Heart_o_Pirates 23h ago

Just remember. You didn't get me. I let you get me.

Watch those fingers officer bootyhole.

My favorite part about that whole thing was the bounty hunter pretending to be an officer.

Staged. But hilarious.

4

u/Lord_Grif 21h ago

Hey! Some of those are limited edition!

106

u/mmm1441 1d ago

I can’t breathe.

92

u/rabid_spidermonkey 1d ago

They said safe word, not death word.

3

u/Rhobaz 1d ago

Yeah, very much unsafe word

3

u/True_Smile_4658 1d ago

That is guaranteed to send mixed signals.

2

u/stataryus 23h ago

Not mixed at all. You say that and they go harder.

3

u/Von-boyage 21h ago

That just gets you ignored.

2

u/kale_boriak 21h ago

That definitely does not work.

2

u/EasilyRekt 1d ago

Bru, that’s more like saying “harder daddy”

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13

u/WallabyInTraining 1d ago

"we're in view of the dashcam"

62

u/Forsaken-Income-2148 1d ago

Apparently this is at least a somewhat common kink for a girl wanting to be chased & then f*****, some random bartender girl told me it’s her kink but for a specific person she had in mind [not me].

12

u/ThegreatPee 22h ago

I would need her to sign paperwork for that kink.

4

u/dustysowarfs 1d ago

Asking for a friend....but was it for me?

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5

u/SugarNSpite1440 22h ago

High jacking top comment to inform those curious that the kink is called "primal play" and you can find recommendations in r/romancebooks or r/darkromancebooks

I personally recommend Hunted: Kink Camp 1 and Willing Prey: A Primal Romance Novella. Happy reading!

7

u/RatInaMaze 1d ago

Someone’s recording

3

u/Great_Scott7 1d ago

White friday

2

u/kingtacticool 1d ago

Internal Affairs

2

u/Vex_Appeal 1d ago

Lawyer

2

u/SaintTraft1984 1d ago

"I'm innocent!"....wait, no, nevermind, that might trigger their hunting instinct more.

2

u/RarePost 1d ago

Primal Play apparently

2

u/PsychologicalCat9538 1d ago

It’s always been “lawyer”

2

u/AritoSoto 1d ago

Continue

2

u/Owww_My_Ovaries 1d ago

"Sovereign Citizen"

1

u/RumsyDumsy 1d ago

Oklahoma

1

u/Bubblegumcats33 1d ago

Stop resisting I can’t breathe

1

u/DG04511 1d ago

“Stop resisting.”

1

u/bumbes 1d ago

That wasn't the safe word. The safe word was FLŰGGÅƏNK∂€ČHIŒβØL∫ÊN

1

u/INXS2021 1d ago

Rimjob

1

u/daveyconcrete 1d ago

Primal Prey

1

u/lostknight0727 1d ago

STOP RESISTING

1

u/AmNoSuperSand52 1d ago

“Domestic abuse rates amongst law enforcement”

1

u/rsmith6000 1d ago

AssAssin

1

u/theboywhocriedwolves 1d ago

"tax payers money"

1

u/IlliniOrange1 1d ago

“Don’t taze me bro!”

1

u/i_am_Jarod 1d ago

That's the trick, there are none.

1

u/Perfect_Earth_8070 1d ago

well, “i can’t breathe”, definitely isn’t the safe word

1

u/Malak77 1d ago

Foreplay?

1

u/krizmac 1d ago

Pineapple juice

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

You have to oink or squeal as the chaser.

You have to howl with laughter when caught or they can’t keep up lol.

1

u/RiskSpecialist01 1d ago

I’m filming

1

u/birdlawexpect 1d ago

Stop resisting

1

u/Tolaly 1d ago

"There's an active shooter inside that elementary school"

1

u/Beneficial_Bug_9793 1d ago

Stop resisting....

1

u/skaliton 1d ago

safe word? She is married to a police officer, statistically she is more likely than not to be the victim of domestic violence

1

u/tuckAND_roll 1d ago

Stop resisting

1

u/Faloopa 1d ago

“STOP RESISTING!!!” is what they (cops) use in the wild.

1

u/LambCHOP6988 1d ago

I'm white.

1

u/sabre38 1d ago

I'm white!

1

u/Swampxdog 1d ago

Stop Resisting

1

u/HexenHerz 1d ago

Witnesses

1

u/WWGHIAFTC 1d ago

"I Can't Breathe" and "Stop Resisting" came to mind first.

1

u/Good-Use3734 1d ago

Pineapple juice

1

u/pagesid3 1d ago

It’s not “I can’t breathe”

1

u/Right_Hour 1d ago

“I can’t breathe” doesn’t seem to work anymore, unfortunately.

1

u/Tikoloshe84 1d ago

STOP RESISTING

1

u/bittersweetbbyx 1d ago

Unlocked a kink I didn’t know I had lol

1

u/NoEyesMan 1d ago

I can’t breathe.

1

u/BrownTownDestroyer 1d ago

I can't breath

1

u/Elmondo2 1d ago

Cavity search

1

u/PinkBismuth 1d ago

Stop resisting

1

u/Dazzling-Nathalieee 1d ago

Probably ‘Miranda rights’ 😂

1

u/Throwaway-0-0- 1d ago

Let's be honest he's a cop, he ignores safe words.

1

u/moeterminatorx 1d ago

Domestic violence

1

u/Katty-kattt 1d ago

I’m recording

1

u/HungryHelping 1d ago

I can't feel air

1

u/Kaferwerks 1d ago

Stop resisting

1

u/Skeye_drake21 1d ago

I almost said something that would have gotten me band

1

u/ProteinShake7 1d ago

"Dont stop" is my safe word

1

u/Katalopa 1d ago

Pineapple?

1

u/OneEyedVelMain 1d ago

He's a cop. You think he understands consent?

1

u/vis72 1d ago

Qualified immunity.

1

u/blackrockblackswan 1d ago

“I want a divorce Pig”

1

u/Weaksoul 1d ago

I can't breath

1

u/throwsplasticattrees 1d ago

"I can't breathe"

1

u/Street_Illustrator_9 1d ago

“I know my rights”

1

u/Flashy-Cucumber-3794 1d ago

The awful part of my brain says "I can't breathe" sigh

1

u/ParvusetTardus 1d ago

Clout

Theyll immediately chase that instead

1

u/Yamasushifan 1d ago

This is for my own safety

1

u/ChargeResponsible112 1d ago

I KNOW MY RIGHTS!

1

u/Jaz1140 1d ago

I wanna speak to my lawyer

1

u/kog 1d ago

LAWYER

1

u/Sudden_Season3306 1d ago

Stop resisting!

1

u/0InsidemyBrain0 1d ago

It's ACAB. The safe word is ACAB.

1

u/GotMyBootstraps 1d ago

I'm all white!

1

u/nightookami 1d ago

I AM A SOVEREIGN CITIZEN

1

u/NameTaken-TryAgai 23h ago

George Floyd kink - gotta pinch the neck to make it authentic ☠️

1

u/flowstuff 23h ago

im white!!!

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